Gender Discussions #2

[emm]

How much are Indian women generally paid to be a surrogate? I can’t imagine it would be a lot if it’s the more ‘cost effective’ option. Ugh just typing that in this context feels wrong. It’s exploitation pure and simple. Women’s bodies are not for sale.

yeh i wonder this too. Even just in the sense of wanting the best for your child it seems strange to go for a "low cost" option (regardless of the ethical implications), if you can afford this surely you would prefer to pay someone who is in a country where you understand the medical system, that the woman will be eating well during the pregnancy etc?

 

[SqualorVictoria]

Where can I find the link to the first thread to this please? The search bar only comes up with this thread "#2"

Here you go

Gender discussions

This is truly becoming a bit terrifying, isn’t it? I’m so glad JK has the balls to stand up and speak the truth, in such eloquent terms. What is happening in the world that someone can’t hear a differing opinion without branding whoever said it a TERF, bigot or [other base insult]? It’s so...

tattle.life

 

[barmj]

Not ~caping just for bi men but women too. Bi men have a hard time as well, imo. Obviously men as a whole are favoured and have it easy ... but. Some gay men won’t date bi men (some of them are actually misogynistic about it, they’re like “ew you touch girls/pussy”), and some women won’t date bi men. I respect that it’s personal preferences but I won’t respect the insults and prejudices that come with it - like yes, I’m bi but I don’t cheat on anyone and I don’t want several partners at once. I’m not confused, and I don’t deserve being treated like dirt.

I forgot to add this in: some lesbians won’t date bi women, and some men won’t date bi women. I can’t edit my post for some reason??

 

[Vee6]

He really really hates women and the GMC don’t seem to give a shit.

The NMC are really harsh with nurses’ use of social media but the GMC doesn’t seem to give a shit what doctors do. Or certain doctors anyway.



Interesting. Further to that Glinner post re Damian Barr & Baroness Nicholson, this has just appeared on my Insta stories timeline... Mr Barr isn’t quite what he seems.

There are lots of horrible tweets from this man that came to light yesterday

 

[PleasantlyObsessed]

what's that?

It's a phrase to describe all the senators, congress(wo)men, state officials, and local officials that are also GOP or Democrat, or a third party. They probably have more power over protecting women locally, honestly. So even if Trump is awful, you could still vote Biden and the rest GOP. This is what I meant by having research to do.

Edit: it's also called "down ballot," because it's lower in the ballot or ticket you vote on.

 

[Vee6]

Omg that’s so selfish. And they will have to answer to those kids about it one day. Imagine what twins would do to your body... for a stranger

 

[Zenchick101]

This man is a GP!

didn't understand that tweet but that man is a gross misogynist. It's scary to think of all his female patients in his care.

 

[Zenchick101]

Stop this madness. The police cali ng people in for their GC views.

holy shit never in my life have I seen a movement this authoritative. Heck #Metoo was called dramatic by the same men who have no problem with this

 

[mindlessness]

Yes, I believe these days transgender is the word used regardless of whether someone MTF or FTM has had surgery. But basically someone choosing to live as/identify as the opposite 'gender'. As per some googling, I understand the distinction used to be that if you got surgery you were Transsexual. So the very early people to do so still use that world (and are, obviously, of an older gen) and younger TRAs see it as a bit perjorative these days?

Then I think Transvestite is someone who just enjoys dressing up as the opposite sex. Grayson Perry refers to himself as a transvestite. See also: Rocky Horror Picture Show.

It’s so annoying. And Carrie is supposed to be an author herself. Aren’t authors supposed to read books first before judging the book. As the saying goes, NEVER JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER! Clearly Carrie can’t even read the book. She hasn’t made any comment about other books like silence of the lambs. And I bet soon she will post any tweet saying some bullshit about her being bullied and getting hate

oops! I've judged her books by their covers and decided to definitely not read them.

 

[Mamacita]

what are you talking about? I’m rly fed up of people thinking bi people are pretending to be straight. Do you also think bi people are greedy, cheating sluts too? I can’t believe people still believe this shit in this day and age.

I thought this was a thread about gender, not shitting on people who dare to be attracted to both men and women.

I don't think that's what that post said at all?

 

[barmj]

Yes that's not fair, as someone mentioned above, it's to do with a person not their sexual orientation. If you're an asshole you're an asshole, no matter what gender you prefer but yeah it's also a bit disheartening to be accused of being bi, homophobic, or transphobic, just because of your personal preference

yeah, I get that completely. People should be able to have their personal preference, as long as it doesn’t deny other people’s rights, like gay people should be able to live without fear and stuff. The thing is, you don’t normally tell someone you just met your sexual history, do you? If I meet someone, I have to make it clear that I’m bi because otherwise we’d like each other but they get grossed out when they find out, and I’m made out to be the bad person and being secretive but dude, I’m just vibing. I’m not being nefarious or anything

Anyway, it’s a bit tricky with trans people. Like I think they should be allowed to live but I’m also concerned about allowing them access to women’s only space

Also, @creme.egg92, absolutely. I agree. I suppose I just want people to be honest with their opinions, you know? Like, you can prefer not dating black people, it is a personal preference but it’s also racism. As long as you’re not being bigoted and denying their rights in everything else, then it’s just personal preference. But it’s important to recognise that personal preferences can hurt people too. Like if someone decided not to date me because I’m bi then it’s like okay, fine. You do you. It still hurts me though because it’s who I am lol I can’t change my sexuality. The girlfriend I mentioned said she loved me despite me being bi, and tbh, that hurt a lot. She made it clear that she found that part of me disgusting.

Sorry, I know this thread isn’t about me or bisexuality, I apologise for going off topic

 

[svdwoodsen]

yeh i wonder this too. Even just in the sense of wanting the best for your child it seems strange to go for a "low cost" option (regardless of the ethical implications), if you can afford this surely you would prefer to pay someone who is in a country where you understand the medical system, that the woman will be eating well during the pregnancy etc?

Surrogacy is illegal where they're from (Sweden) and I believe Denmark (where the egg is from), unless the woman uses her own egg and gives the baby up for adoption without a fee (effectively like helping out a friend).

I think their options were Eastern Europe and India and for whatever reason, they decided India was a better option. They also seriously considered the U.S. but it's very expensive with lots of legal restrictions so it would've taken longer and been more difficult/expensive.

 

[judgejohndeed]

Looks like Crispin Blunt is trying to lose Liz Truss her job - isn’t he the guy who left his wife for another man but voted against gay rights?

 

[Vee6]

Also on podcast. I listened to this the other day. And it’s haunted me ever since. What happened at the youth groups and collages is really twisted and the abuse from grown ups in horrific. Worth listening to, to see how the youngsters are captured under everyone’s noses

 

[Vee6]

Does anyone know anyone in real life who is an active pro-trans lobbyist (as in, militant and outspoken about it)? Or is it all just contained on Twitter and within Jameela Jamil's timeline? Is it more common in the U.S? I have never met anyone IRL who actually believes JK Rowling is a transphobe, but I would really like to know where these people actually are. I move in fairly liberal circles and I'm in my early 30s, not like I'm a dinosaur hanging out with old people who only read the Express. Any IRL stories greatly appreciated.

No.
During lockdown two people on my fb friends have teenage daughters who have come ‘out’ as trans. One is 15 or 16 the other 12.
A middle aged (37) man I used to go out with 20 ago came out a few years ago as a trans woman who was not going to even dress as a woman. He doesn’t say much on there but put a fuck you jk thing the other day that I ignored. I don’t think for one second he is trans gender just attention seeking.
i can’t think of anyone in my life that has mentioned anything to do with it all, unless I’ve said something

 

[openbook1]

Therein lies the problem... social media power. It used to be localised peer pressure, now it’s a global phenomenon that pushes and pushes.

That is how certain presidents managed to gain so much traction with their abhorrent views. SM is a scary place.

My jaw has hit the floor!!

WTF. Nah, I am raging AGAIN.

 

[thatstupidcat]

The Marie Stopes stuff is terrible. I haven’t seen their weepy response though. Must have a look for that.

They seem to have deleted all references on Twitter and Facebook overnight. It was ratio’d as hell before I logged out.

Who’d have thunk it.

 

[Doc]

I do believe Emma Watson too but she’ll jump on any bandwagon.

She’s a self interested twat.

Ive just read on aSky article - Eddie Redmayne, Daniel Radcliffe, Stephen King, Emma Watson, Labour MP Lloyd Russell-Moyle. So 4:1 men then.

 

[PleasantlyObsessed]

So I was active on "gender critical" reddit and none of it was particularly hateful, many voicing the same opinions that we have here. Anyway, today that reddit page was banned for "promoting hate." We are literally being shut up. There were rumours yesterday it was going to get deleted and people asked if there is an alternative so I pointed towards Tattle.

Was that you? I read that and thought, "Just in case, let me screenshot this," and I thought I'd never look at it again. Thank you! And inferring from a clue in the username, I think it was you.

 

[LittleMy]

I’ve had a friend online since the age of eleven; we have a mutual friend who while born female identifies as non binary. Because they’re an internet friend they’re not a friend I see often. They’re on a website similar to this but with more customisation in the profile area - name, age, picture of yourself etc. The main area where you chat is forum based and you have to click through to look at their profile. The problem? Being ‘non binary’ to them means switching between male and female presentation/pronouns staunchly each day. I got it mixed up once and referred to them as a dude, “aw dude, how are you?”
Apparently I should’ve looked at their profile and saw which pronouns and name they were going by that day (no photo, and the name thing doesn’t help as they have a ‘purposefully gender neutral name’ e.g. Pencil) because they find terms like ‘man’ and ‘dude’ offensive if they’re presenting as female.
I very nearly lost that other friend - who has ‘known‘ me since I was eleven - because then, in a private conversation talking about our non binary chum, I accidentally used she/her pronouns. Genuinely, the venom I had spat at me that day. I got ignored for weeks, labelled transphobic, had to apologise to my friend (not the NB person) or ‘he’d tell them what i did’, and now only talk to them briefly.
I’ve genuinely had it drummed into me to use they/them and happily will to people I know IRL if that’s what they want but I hate that there’s no leeway whatsoever - you make one mistake, you’re the devil incarnate. And I think if someone changes something big about themselves like their gender identity of COURSE people will find it hard to cope with at first?! How is it okay for the trans/NB person to question, tie themselves in knots, over their identity - but those around them can’t ever mess up? It’s not just here, you see it a lot on twitter, oh your transphobic parents didn’t refer to you using your pronouns, they’re EVIL. No!

That person was just being precious and needs to grow up.

We need an eyeroll reaction emoji. Honestly!

Been saying this for months