I think schools and parents and TV and films need to focus again on teaching kids about puberty. Not just the biology and sexuality, but about growing pains, hormones, social anxiety, fear of growing up, body dysmorphia , etc. What I think kids are missing in general is being told that yes puberty can be a right mindfuck, but that we all go through it and we all progress into adults. We should be focussing on supporting the tackling of intrusive thoughts, and teach teens to respect the process, to nourish themselves physically and mentally, to engage in society e.g. part time jobs, hobbies, volunteering. Getting out there and making a difference or at least taking part in something that's part of the bigger picture.
I think, our parents had to go out and make money to feed families after periods of financial depression, our grandparents and great grandparents all had to muck in to war effort whether than be fighting or growing food or healing the sick.
Our great great grandparents did not sit idle at home, no, very likely they didn't get a childhood, they would have either been married off or working in order to survive. Now I'm not saying we need to go back to young marriages or working up chimneys as kids again. But it has not escaped my notice as a 30-something kid from the 90s, which is not THAT long ago, that teens now don't have what I had:-
- only 1 telly that was in the living room which was shared among my siblings and my parents. Watching TV was a communal exercise that we looked forward to after homework or on a Saturday Night (remember Gladiators and Fort Boyard, anyone?)
- actually going round friends houses to socialise and going to the park to run off steam, rather than sitting chronically online.
- family time that is not taken over by mobile phones/ screen time. I remember family dinners were spent talking about our day, and being almost counselled by my parents if anything was bothering me. (I appreciate not everyone has a good family life, but surely on the whole, more adults and children are glued to phones these days and don't necessarily prioritise meaningful and sometimes difficult conversations these days).
-fads were often more localised and too longer to "take off", whereas now whole ideologies take off online worldwide, within weeks/months
- youthful indiscretions, mistakes, goofiness etc were not posted and shared online, you weren't cancelled by thousands for saying the wrong word, more likely we had someone take us aside and explain why not to do/say the thing again, and your character was allowed the opportunity to improve/grow. For example at school there was a trend to say "you dropped your gay card" and other stupid things like that. We all did it, we were reprimanded and we understood it was wrong. If it were now, someone would have filmed us and we'd lose everything for the rest of our lives, because you're not allowed to make childish mistakes these days without severe social recriminations.
- I don't think 90s kids' egos were pandered to, a lot of us got sense knocked into us, now it's like adults are afraid of teens.
-schools educated us on facts and generally encouraged debate and didn't overtly indoctrinate us towards one political persuasion over the other, from what I personally recall.
-parents were able to tell us when we were in the wrong, now parents fear the schools/police will come take them away for questioning.
-schools didn't get involved in hiding stuff from parents.
-there used to be places teens could go to blow off steam and have fun, where are all the roller discos, adventure parks, youth clubs now? You barely hear of Brownies/Guides Scouts etc these days, and even those have been captured.
- parents could generally trust counsellers to help their children resolve issues, now, some counsellers will actively steer kids towards harmful medical procedures or harmful behaviour.
Every generation faces battles but it does seem that today's teens have the most technology and opportunities at their disposal than ever before, but they seem typically so miserable, egotistical, and demanding. It's refreshing when you meet good kids who are untouched by all this ideology.
When you think about it, it seems so sad, and these kids are being told that all adults are bigots or boomers or whatever, so they don't want to relate to us and have calm, considered debate.
Not all teens, obviously, but it is blatant that kids are suffering with social contagion. They are being fed lies on an unprecedented scale, so quickly, so intensely.
I don't know how we solve this other than schools going back to facts and healthy debate, kids having less screentime and adults having frank conversations with kids to manage expectations. It seems so desperate now
listening to JK speak, this is what it means to live as a woman not fucking dresses and lipstick. To lose babies, to feel much more magnitude and vulnerability if you move away/abroad, to feel at the mercy of dangerous men, to never escape your social position or physical vulnerabilities because of your biological reality.
hmmm
