Gabriella Lindley #32

[Swipeuplikeandshare]

Sew guyzz
What are the goalzzz for our Gabzz this year? I’m thinking she might go and create a second spreadsheet...maybe that’s beyond the possible tho

 

[Randomlyorange]

When Gab says “new year new me” knowing full well she is still gonna stay indoors with no friends, have more operashuns, cat will get fatter and she will have another scandal or two

 

[Creep]

I know I keep going on but I just can't get my head wrapped around how much of a victim she plays when she's sew sew poorly or has an operashun. I had foot surgery earlier on this week, I'm having to be up and about a little despite the doctor saying stay off it completely for at least a week. But guess what Gobble, not everyone has 24/7 care as my fiancé does actually have to go to work

I cried this morning as I got up before fiancé, came downstairs to then feeling like I needed my first tit after surgery. I got up the stairs and got stuck because I can't do everything on my own and I hate having to rely on someone else. So I cried lmao. It's so frustrating having to constantly wait on someone else to do basic things for you

That just reminds me, perhaps I just need to have a box downstairs for me to tit in a la Gobble

 

[Influenzapandemic]

My husband asked me once who Gabbo was and when I told him, he got increasingly annoyed at her and asked why I followed her. I said to him I think I keep up with her because of this forum, I love it here
Happy new years yew trolls

And happy birthday Janey, you deserve everything Gobbs gives to you this day

I follow her feeds on here for the laugh. I’ve never followed her or watched her

Sew guyzz
What are the goalzzz for our Gabzz this year? I’m thinking she might go and create a second spreadsheet...maybe that’s beyond the possible tho

Woah woah woah pace yourself. Maybe another tab on the existing one!

 

[Littlemisadoughnut]

Can I just say I only dip in and out of this thread because I honestly hate Gabby that much I struggle to follow her in any capacity. But every time I come here I ROAR you guys are bleeping hilarious! Even gabby has to chuckle reading this thread seriously!

 

[trularajcica]

She had a meltdown at his housewarming party and locked herself in the loo crying.

how do you know about this? was it in a vlog/twitter/instagram?
always crying in the loo, such a drama queen, no wonder nobody wants her in their life.

 

[Lemonz]

Amazing, she’s seeing in the new year with a pot noodle. I swear she’s trolling us half of the time.

Is that prescription paracetamol in the background? Sorry Gobs but i thought your pain was SEW horrendous, surely they wouldnt have just fobbed you off with a standard painkiller?
Also who doesnt just buy paracetamol lol its like 50p a pack

 

[Swipeuplikeandshare]

I know I keep going on but I just can't get my head wrapped around how much of a victim she plays when she's sew sew poorly or has an operashun. I had foot surgery earlier on this week, I'm having to be up and about a little despite the doctor saying stay off it completely for at least a week. But guess what Gobble, not everyone has 24/7 care as my fiancé does actually have to go to work

I cried this morning as I got up before fiancé, came downstairs to then feeling like I needed my first tit after surgery. I got up the stairs and got stuck because I can't do everything on my own and I hate having to rely on someone else. So I cried lmao. It's so frustrating having to constantly wait on someone else to do basic things for you

That just reminds me, perhaps I just need to have a box downstairs for me to tit in a la Gobble

maybe try putting your feet up on a box to get a better position and a bit of Lukewarm water on your bum - also try a heat pad on the bottom of your back might help xxx

 

[Alrighthunxo]

Is that prescription paracetamol in the background? Sorry Gobs but i thought your pain was SEW horrendous, surely they wouldnt have just fobbed you off with a standard painkiller?
Also who doesnt just buy paracetamol lol its like 50p a pack

You can guarantee she did the “I need to take all 8 a day and don’t want to be going out every day ” thing despite the fact she’s being going to Greggs and OLIVER bleeping BONAS

PS- Happy New Year scummy wee trolls

 

[mindlessness]

My little contribution to our musical.

Don't cry for me, Starbucks Barista
The truth is
I never left you
All through my sick days
My sad existence
I kept my rewards points
Don't keep me waiting.

edited to add: Happy new year I only ever check in on her to keep up with you all and the many funny jokes. Especially a big tattle hug to anyone struggling at the moment. We’re here for you!

 

[Hurrah54]

This has probably been said but I'm sure she said she was on her period over Christmas day but she's on her period now as well? ...

Also.. pizza, a doughnut yum yum thing and pot noodle.. this girl must not have had a tit for daysssss.
Food is just fuel tho pot noodle is sewper and sew incredibly fewlling for the body

 

[Fillyjonk]

She has eaten pure crap. Carbs upon carbs upon carbs. I know she says period poos are awful with endo, but come on girl, constipated period poos with endo are gonna be even worse. Eat something that's green.

Uh oh! Earworm alert.

I know carbs are the greatest
Don't put veg on my plate, you sadist
So I've stretched out my band
And my diet's a scam
Still I'll live on mashed taters
Dieticians are jealous haters
And I dream of a place
Where I can live entirely on ham

A chimney made of pork
A field of sausage trees
The walls papered with bacon
Jane's car runs on the grease
A floating bath lasagne
To eat while I get clean
I'll never have to eat
Something that's green.

 

[Sanctified]

She has eaten pure crap. Carbs upon carbs upon carbs. I know she says period poos are awful with endo, but come on girl, constipated period poos with endo are gonna be even worse. Eat something that's green.

Uh oh! Earworm alert.

I know carbs are the greatest
Don't put veg on my plate, you sadist
So I've stretched out my band
And my diet's a scam
Still I'll live on mashed taters
Dieticians are jealous haters
And I dream of a place
Where I can live entirely on ham

A chimney made of pork
A field of sausage trees
The walls papered with bacon
Jane's car runs on the grease
A floating bath lasagne
To eat while I get clean
I'll never have to eat
Something that's green.

Jewniper mewn makes little shop of horrors even more relevant

 

[Randomlyorange]

This has probably been said but I'm sure she said she was on her period over Christmas day but she's on her period now as well? ...

Also.. pizza, a doughnut yum yum thing and pot noodle.. this girl must not have had a tit for daysssss.
Food is just fuel tho pot noodle is sewper and sew incredibly fewlling for the body

Fewling

 

[Doc]

She’s Sewper-Gabby-Tragic-Bitchin-Endow-is-Ferocious!
Even though the sound of her
Is pitchy and atrocious
She’ll always tell you loud enough
‘Cosss ailments are her focus!
Sewper-Gabby-Tragic-Bitchin-Endow-Is-Ferocious!

Um-dittle-ittl-um-dittle-I
Um-dittle-ittl-um-dittle-I
Um-dittle-ittl-um-dittle-I
Um-dittle-ittl-um-dittle-I

Because we are afraid to speak
We gather in this place
she can’t block, her power’s weak
we avoid her slapped-arse face
But we think she reads the board
She always has a nose!
There’s a word for her artful fraud
And this is how it goes

Ohhhhhhh! SewperGabbyTragicBitchinEndowIsFerocious!
Even though the sound of her
Is pitchy and atrocious
She’ll always tell you loud enough
‘Cosss ailments are her focus!
Sewper-Gabby-Tragic-Bitchin-Endow-Is-Ferocious!

Happy New Year wee scummy trolls

 

[runforitmarty]

She’s Sewper-Gabby-Tragic-Bitchin-Endow-is-Ferocious!
Even though the sound of her
Is pitchy and atrocious
She’ll always tell you loud enough
‘Cosss ailments are her focus!
Sewper-Gabby-Tragic-Bitchin-Endow-Is-Ferocious!

Um-dittle-ittl-um-dittle-I
Um-dittle-ittl-um-dittle-I
Um-dittle-ittl-um-dittle-I
Um-dittle-ittl-um-dittle-I

Because we are afraid to speak
We gather in this place
she can’t block, her power’s weak
we avoid her slapped-arse face
But we think she reads the board
She always has a nose!
There’s a word for her artful fraud
And this is how it goes

Ohhhhhhh! SewperGabbyTragicBitchinEndowIsFerocious!
Even though the sound of her
Is pitchy and atrocious
She’ll always tell you loud enough
‘Cosss ailments are her focus!
Sewper-Gabby-Tragic-Bitchin-Endow-Is-Ferocious!

Happy New Year wee scummy trolls

Holy tit you are a lyrical genius

 

[judgejohndeed]

I love how Gabby must be silently fuming reading all these brilliant Gabby-themed songs but hasn’t said anything about it the creativity, she could NEVER

 

[Sanctified]

She’s Sewper-Gabby-Tragic-Bitchin-Endow-is-Ferocious!
Even though the sound of her
Is pitchy and atrocious
She’ll always tell you loud enough
‘Cosss ailments are her focus!
Sewper-Gabby-Tragic-Bitchin-Endow-Is-Ferocious!

Um-dittle-ittl-um-dittle-I
Um-dittle-ittl-um-dittle-I
Um-dittle-ittl-um-dittle-I
Um-dittle-ittl-um-dittle-I

Because we are afraid to speak
We gather in this place
she can’t block, her power’s weak
we avoid her slapped-arse face
But we think she reads the board
She always has a nose!
There’s a word for her artful fraud
And this is how it goes

Ohhhhhhh! SewperGabbyTragicBitchinEndowIsFerocious!
Even though the sound of her
Is pitchy and atrocious
She’ll always tell you loud enough
‘Cosss ailments are her focus!
Sewper-Gabby-Tragic-Bitchin-Endow-Is-Ferocious!

Happy New Year wee scummy trolls

The fact that you can come up with this as a joke, and Gobs hasn't come up with any original songs is so funny

Come on gabs, step your game up girl.

 

[BoomTimesTwo]

I hope she’s furiously screenshotting all these songs to send to her lawyer!!! Can you imagine trying to keep a straight face reading these in your super duper fancy expensive lawyer office?! Sitting on the toilet during their break merrily humming tunes to VelvetBlocked the Loosical.
If I was Gabby I’d steal the whole lot of your lyrics and make my west end debut! Zoe can sing and so can Lucy and Lydia, they could have background roles.. and of course Hobbie as the love interest in her tragic life type of illness, bullying and mistreatment

 

[judgejohndeed]

In case anyone wants to see the quantity of stuff she's ordering

I was just about to post this - 2.5k thank you cards? Looooollllllll she’s off her rocker