A shower, in the garden, in suburbia. And they don't even walk to the beach.
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They’ve got a kitchen in the garden, might as well add a bathroom as well 
He's such a grumpy old man who doesn't appreciate how fortunate he is. He'll find ANYTHING to complain about.
"It's not special," he says about living where he does.
Yes it f***ing is. How many people in the world do you think would trade places with you in an instant? How many people can only dream of having a family to carry things for and having all that open space practically on their doorstep?
The beach isn't everybody's thing of course and you don't have to rave about it, but I can't imagine there are many parents who would come back from taking their children to the beach and then make a long list of things they hate about it (half of which are about parenting itself) and publish it where their children can read it.
"It's not special," he says about living where he does.
Yes it f***ing is. How many people in the world do you think would trade places with you in an instant? How many people can only dream of having a family to carry things for and having all that open space practically on their doorstep?
The beach isn't everybody's thing of course and you don't have to rave about it, but I can't imagine there are many parents who would come back from taking their children to the beach and then make a long list of things they hate about it (half of which are about parenting itself) and publish it where their children can read it.
I can picture it now.
We’ll they had already had a perfectly good bath in the garden for ages ( which they’d they ripped out of the perfectly good bathroomThey’ve got a kitchen in the garden, might as well add a bathroom as well
God yet another love island villa addition to the garden.
It’s neither big nor private enough for all this tat? Get a hose attachment with mist or spray mode and call it a day, it’s not like Aesop will be sending you gifted bits for it anyway.
It’s neither big nor private enough for all this tat? Get a hose attachment with mist or spray mode and call it a day, it’s not like Aesop will be sending you gifted bits for it anyway.
It’s the same as their house, proof that money can’t buy style. Just because you can squeeze more unnecessary tat in, doesn’t mean you should!
I have never watched love Island (feel smug about that) but I now have visions of us being treated to him in the shower.
His latest story with the dogs water bowl. Most staged video ever.
He just happened to have a phone set up to film him entering the kitchen and "tripping over" their bowl. I turned myself inside out with cringe and second hand embarrassment.
He just happened to have a phone set up to film him entering the kitchen and "tripping over" their bowl. I turned myself inside out with cringe and second hand embarrassment.
I also reported it as the same, it's absolutely sickening that he shared that!Reported the bra story to insta…as with previous I doubt they’ll do anythingbut one of the options is child semi naked/nudity so selected that!
Middle class problems
Just watched. How cringe at how set up that was! What a loser! Def doesn’t have a job!
‘That’s gratitude for you’ what that you tripped over a dog bowl has anything to do with the dog
Laughing at his story.
The dogs moved the bowl. We need the sure Jan gif.
The dogs moved the bowl. We need the sure Jan gif.
The guy next door is an actual banker and his wife is a lawyer. The really rich folk don’t have points to prove their wealth.The Hoopers come across as trying too hard.Middle class problems
Lucky us !
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It’s not even going to be nicely done that’s the thing, I saw a v fancy garden house on Insta with an outdoor bath that was clearly done by an architects firm / was in the huge garden of a huge house, so worked…? But this is gonna be a monstrosity FOD cobbles together from B&Q, a hose really would be more chic than something that’ll be falling to bits come one single winter!
I don't wish harm on people, but stupid set up tit like that deserves a slip and broken ankle to be fair.‘That’s gratitude for you’ what that you tripped over a dog bowl has anything to do with the dog
Remember when he slid along on ice for content then ended up on his arse?
Imagine he injured himself and rocked up to A&E, and they ask how did you do that?
Oh I was filming myself tripping over a dog bowl that I knew was there for IG content, and ended up slipping and rolling over on my ankle.
Absolute bellend
Hey Simon, if you want us to believe you've got an always-on camera in your kitchen, then show us the footage of the dogs moving the water bowl.
You can't
You can't
It’s too much to hope that even the dogs are sick
of him and so nudged their water bowl into his path in the hope this smug faced twonk would smash his face on the kitchen counter
of him and so nudged their water bowl into his path in the hope this smug faced twonk would smash his face on the kitchen counter
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% - honestly you’ve summed it up perfectly as ever Axa.Also, sorry to backtrack slightly, but how staged was the pier story that had him with a twin watching the older girls? He filmed a convo with a twin and commented on them crabbing together. Twin made a profound comment “I’ve never seen them enjoy each other’s company so much”. He then commented how much he loves it when little ones have conversations they don’t understand. Totally content created. Zero need for the convo to have been filmed at all so he’d very obviously staged it and set up his 6 year old with a script to comment on her sisters. Just thinking about that makes him just get worse and worse in my mind. He’s utterly despicable.
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