Eoghan McDermott - Irish radio stars face social media allegations.

[rebremm99]

Let me tell you what I have to live with.
I was 14 when a man in his mid 40's groomed me. I'd have considered myself very intelligent.
I was bullied at the time, so had no friends, no one to confide in. I was played like a violin to believe that someone genuinely cared for me.

I didn't want to do any of the sex stuff, which I know know was abuse, but I did it because I was so afraid of what would happen if I didn't.
He never threatened me, he didn't have to. I knew enough to be afraid.
It did come out what was happening, he was jailed, but once it came out I put it in a box in my head.
The box was always there.
With every dysfunctional relationship that followed, the box was there.

I finally, 10 years later, got counselling.
No one had told me I was abused, until then.
All I could think was it was my own fault.
Because I kept returning, so I must have liked it.
I didn't, but sure, as you have clearly said in your post, why go back after the first time???


Within the last 20 years I've made several attempts on my life.
I bear physical scars from where I've harmed myself, because I needed to see actual physical damage to be able to say to myself "now you can cry, now you have a "reason" To feel so disgusting, so ugly, so broken, because now your skin is.

I will never ever hold a full time job again.
I am not able for it mentally.
I'm medicated for the last 10 years.
I had dreams
I had wishes.
I had hopes.

Yes overall my life is good now, but it is not the life I dreamed of.

I will never do the job I dreamed of, help the people I wanted to help.
I will never be a functioning member of society.




He got 3 years.

I got life.

I am now in my mid 30's

My heart is broken reading this I stand with you x

 

[Emerald37]

I think the key point from that posters original point is to "please try let the evidence and the courts do what they are supposed to do".

Idle speculation and a desire for media articles about it can actually harm the potential for a prosecution. Plus, it should be possible to say that he could be innocent whilst also being aware that far too many sexual assaults go unpunished. We don't know the specific circumstances in this case, so I don't think it's fair to make wider judgements on it.

Bib but in sex crimes all you need to do if you're a perpatrator is prove reasonable doubt. The burden of proof is always on the alleged victom to prove they were assaulted and their behaviour and previous sex life is always used in these instances. Courts do not favour any victim

 

[Freddie101]

It derails the conversation when we say things like not all men, or it happens to men too. We know that. However statistically women are at a much much higher risk and it's much harder for us to make things change, look at our government, our judges, our lawmakers. They're men. Men wrote the laws and men enforce them or more often than not they don't, and so men as a group benefit the most from this broken system. The current system was written for men by men so it's important not to queiten the voices of the women battling for a fairer system by including men in the problem we face. Because it just isn't the same fight. Women have a massive disadvantage. Physically, statistically and legally.

While I agree there are levels of sexual violence each one plays a part in creating rape culture as a whole. I have been catcalled, had my boobs commented on in work from as young as 15 right up until my 30's, been groped more times than I can count and I've been raped. Obviously some of my experiences as worse than others but every one of those incidences contributes to a wider problem. If we want our kids to live in a safer world we need to have zero tolerance.

I stand with you & I believe you.

Apart from my CSA, I was subjected to being flashed twice by 2 different men.
1 an uncle and the other was a bestfriends Father.
Those 2 places were my safe places when I was growing up and they took those away from me as I couldn’t visit them anymore as I was so absolutely disgusted & violated.

With my uncle I was sent up by my aunt to get an iron from their bedroom, he was in the room so I knocked and asked if he could give it to me, he said to come in and get it so I edged the door and I could see he was undressed and I said oh no I’ll wait. He then called me in and said it was fine, he was completely naked holding the iron at his crotch

The second one I was leaving my friends house to go home, I forgot my jacket in her bathroom (I think we were bathing her dog and I left it in there) so I went and knocked on the door, her Dad was having a shave and said “oh come on in (insert name)” so he knew it was me. He was completely naked in the bathroom.

I have one more experience which I can’t disclose fully as it will “out” me but it involves someone close to me having a bf at least 8 years older than me when I was 15 & what I understand now as being groomed via text. He kept on trying to get me to meet him “just for a kiss”. I never did.

I feel as sick in my stomach right now as I did all those years ago.

Thank you to everyone that has shared stories and given others the courage to speak out. I have never written or spoken about the above to anyone before
So thank you for creating a safe space on this thread

 

[testingonetwothreefoiur]

I’m sure Aoife won’t appreciate him dragging this up and making such a private statement public, with her having clearly moved on with a new partner and all. This is the kind of thing you might (MIGHT) send by private text if at all, not blast on your insta story.

 

[Aoifeek]

The solicitors letter is very carefully worded. She admits to making a series of false allegations like how she was under the age of consent at the time, (maybe she thought her being 17 was under the age of consent, who knows). I would advise those who believe she has admitted to making the whole thing up to read the letter again. There seems to be an acknowledgement between both of them that a relationship took place, but Eoghan denies her version of events.

She admits to making false allegations about his family members being guards and that he fled the country (possibly influenced information by third parties as addressed by her solicitor in the letter) and she apologises for retweeting claims of alleged abuse from third parties - but I don’t see where she takes back any claim about an assault taking place? Just that she accepts that Eoghan fundamentally disputes her version of events - she does not say it never happened or takes back the claim. Him saying in his tweet that a “series of false allegations were made about me” is very clever as people would ultimately think the whole thing was lies. And for clarity I am not for one second saying I believe he did anything to this girl. I just find the wording of the letter interesting and noticed that she never took back or apologised for her initial claim like some people assume she did.

Isn't the timing convenient also.....the second the Two Johnnies were socially exonerated he releases this very cryptic letter. The whole thing seems like a settlement.

 

[AnnaBananaPie]

Doctors can be high profile jobs in small communities, and if you’re from a small area like I am everyone knows who the local doctors are. I’d imagine if you worked in McDonalds you could at least maintain a bit of anonymity.

Its also a job of huge responsibility and face to face personal and private communication. A lot of doctor patients relationships revolve around trust -if it’s maybe someone seeking help for a mental health or family issue

whether we like to admit it or not if a family member /partner /husband /sister etc commits a high profile crime people judge and speculate and would possibly loose trust and confidence with someone like a doctor they have a personal private relationship with if they thought their partner was grooming young girls ?

 

[Transparency]

Wow! Sorry for asking a question. How am I victim blaming! I asked a question? I did not victim blame, nor have I ever! I’m also not assuming anything, maybe read it again and you’ll see who’s the idiot! Very mature of you!

By questioning a victim you doubts a victim and you blame a victim so yes this makes you an idiot !

 

[ahtisyourself]

There is something very embarrassing about him posting that. He’s looking for attention I assume. Pathetic individual.

 

[onetwothreesquealonme]

Here are the Reddit posts sorry not in correct order!

 

[PepsiCherry]

LOL a BOT could have written a better spiel. You’re full of shit and clearly came here to write that in an attempt to bully/ scare the victim.

110%.

My cousin worked on a show on rte and became great mates with Eoghan. He stopped being mates with him when he realised he was absolute creep.

Eoghan and RTEs silence is DEAFENING. He is a prick and we don't know the full extent what he's done yet and doubt we ever will with our poxy legal system.

Stand up for victims !

Everytime I see this thread has a new post I think YES, eoghan is now being prosecuted ! remaining hopeful

 

[Tazzie]

I have also been a victim of sexual assault. It happened over twenty years ago and up
Until recently I have blamed myself for being drunk and allowing myself to be in that situation. It’s only been in the last few months that I have come to terms with how it impacted my life and how but so many walls and behaviors around myself to protect me. Thankfully with the help of an amazing therapist I have put a lot of those issues behind me. I would didn’t speak up 20 years ago, as I felt it was my fault because I’d had too much to drink, if I hadn’t then it wouldn’t of happened. This is partly true it may not have happened to me but it may have happened to someone else. I often think at my lowest points did my silence mean another woman was subjected to this man also. The guilt I have felt for so long paralysed me for 20 years. Thankfully I am well on the way to peace now

 

[MollyMalone]

I imagine it's probably because people are entitled to a fair trial. Innocent until proven guilty etc

I dont think anyone is actually arguing this. I dont think anyone feels anything but sympathy for the girl in question but people are entitled to a fair trial.

Does anyone remember when Roxanne Pallet accused ryan thomas on Big Brother of hitting her? Only that a camera was rolling at the time his career would have absolutely been ruined.

I havent actually heard anyone say the girl in the eoghan McDermott situation is lying. It's more like concern that the way she has chosen to speak out may mean that he walks away from it because he has already faced a trial by media.

He is entitled to a fair trial, just as she is entitled to report the incident to the authorities without being questioned and blamed for waiting 11 years to come forward or for doing it on social media. There have been a few commenters on this thread wondering why so long, why now, why not the guards etc. It's irrelevant. she has her reasons and that's all we need to know. she shouldn't have to face social media trial either

 

[testingonetwothreefoiur]

If it's an active investigation, the papers will not be able to report on it or the nature of his departure from RTE. RTE are being really careful here for the same reason, and it's why Eoghan's fallen completely silent on social media and all of this family's profiles are now private. I used to be a journalist and this is quite a common thing to happen in media, you'll know a lot of messed up things about a lot of celebrities / politicians and be unable to report for legal reasons.

 

[Irishjools]

I think the Guards were dealing with it at the time or there was some kind of investigation happening whereas with Eoghan it was with the guards and isn’t going forward from what I could gather and in some cases people haven’t gone to the guards yet maybe ?

IMO homophobia had a huge part to play in the difference between Al P and other cases mentioned on this thread.

 

[DailyGlitter]

Doireann is about as likeable/funny as a dose of the clap but I think its unfair people are asking her about him.

 

[DailyGlitter]

The silence is deafening from someone who is such an attention whore.

He was able to play the media game - telling them when he as much as sneezed.....but nothing now. Funny that.

 

[AnnaBananaPie]

His personality was very Unlikeable , for me anyway -even before this scandal

 

[testingonetwothreefoiur]

The fact that every single news website that has published this story has disabled the comments says it all. There's some sort of media moratorium happening where every journalist in Ireland has heard these rumours but is unable to publish unsubstantiated allegations while some sort of investigation takes place. Defamatory laws in Ireland are really strict around this kind of stuff and you can't touch with a bargepole for fear of being sued.

 

[Future]

I must say this is what I find worrying. Seems to be 5-6 women who have been his victims and the victim alliance have stated outright they are helping these women with the criminal and civil suits. I’ve probably said before but in 2007 I had a sexual assault happen me (not rape to be clear and I apologise to anyone who thinks I should use a different phrasebut to me it was sexual assault but I got away). I knew him and a week later he wrote to me, a vague letter saying sorry and a cheque for €1000 which in 2007 got you more than it would today. I went to the guards and I was asked did I really want to take him on, that he was a big rich businessman and he had invested in half the town and it would be hard to prove.the scared young girl I was fled of course from the guards that day. so in 2012 I visited a fabulous female solicitor with the apology note I had kept in my car for years and the cheque I never chased. I started a civil claim with her and it got settled out of court for a decent amount of money. I had awful anxiety around relationships and trust for years and even driving through that town used make me vomit .sorry for the long winded story I’m trying to say you may not always have a criminal case or charge but there is a lot you can do civilly in terms of personal injury with the right support

You poor thing, that's awful. Glad you got the fucker in the end x x

Yeah i guess your story has reminded me of the McGregor case that's going on at the mo with the girl who was raped in the hotel. Hopefully the girls will get some sort of acknowledgement from all of this.

 

[Plainwhited]

It's just crazy! And for them all to just not mention it on air, talk about the elephant in the room. Love to be a fly in the wall in the Rte canteen
If he did do it though, I presume the girl is going down the public shaming route rather than going to court? I don't know much about the legal system but surely all this talk online would prevent him from having a fair trial?