Dating after Lockdown

[realhousewivewannabe]

Hmm..poor excuse!

What on earth is that excuse!! Omg pathetic

 

[Likkleone]

I matched with a guy on bumble on Tuesday. Tbh I only swiped him because I could tell it was him from his pixelated photo in my “beeline” He’s 5 years older than me (he’s 40) with 2 young sons. He extended the match within an hour of us matching, so I had 2 days instead of 24 hours to send the first message! keen. Anyway, we’ve only been messaging once a day and tbh I’m not bouncing off him conversation wise and it’s kind of put me off that he’s swapped his profile pic about 3 maybe 4 times. Who’s benefit is that for? To reel in other potential matches?! Ugh apps are like a cattle market. He sent me a message this morning telling me he was free tomorrow for a coffee, but I’m not feeling it. Anyone else get like this?!

Totally get this... some people aren’t great at texting? I wonder if you met it could be different? But don’t take my advice, I’m yet to meet up with ANYONE from a dating app - they always seem to put me off just before meeting

 

[coconochanel]

He has the cheek to like my FB post!

 

[it’s not been changed?!]

Totally get this... some people aren’t great at texting? I wonder if you met it could be different? But don’t take my advice, I’m yet to meet up with ANYONE from a dating app - they always seem to put me off just before meeting

I did think to give him the benefit of the doubt and that he might be easier to talk to in person. I know I said he was only five years older than me but I’m getting intense older guy vibes




I’m just trying to put myself off him lol.

 

[CynicalV]

Been using Bumble for a couple days now and started talking to one guy who from his bio seemed funny and had things in common. About 5 messages in he used all of these emojis across one single message:
Unmatched.

 

[realhousewivewannabe]

My fellow singletons: How are you coping with being the “single one”?

At the moment it feels as though EVERYONE around is either pregnant, buying properties with their other half or getting engaged.

If it’s not on Facebook (lol) it’s over Instagram or it’s on WhatsApp.

Don’t get me wrong I am so happy for people in this life phase including my friends and family members who are all of the above including two of them getting engaged this weekend but at the same time I am really struggling with it all.

In my friendship group I am the only single one, living with parents and it’s just a bit disheartening especially when all that is discussed is boyfriends, babies, house, fiancés, wedding planning, double dates (which you get left out of and just see on social media) or you get asked what’s new when really what’s being implied is when are you going to find someone, or that there must be something wrong with you if you haven’t found someone yet.

I am starting to feel overwhelmed by it all and freaking out at the same time as it just feels like I’m stuck on this crap single ride i can’t get off and online dating is doing my head!

 

[Travelmehomee]

My fellow singletons: How are you coping with being the “single one”?

At the moment it feels as though EVERYONE around is either pregnant, buying properties with their other half or getting engaged.

If it’s not on Facebook (lol) it’s over Instagram or it’s on WhatsApp.

Don’t get me wrong I am so happy for people in this life phase including my friends and family members who are all of the above including two of them getting engaged this weekend but at the same time I am really struggling with it all.

In my friendship group I am the only single one, living with parents and it’s just a bit disheartening especially when all that is discussed is boyfriends, babies, house, fiancés, wedding planning, double dates (which you get left out of and just see on social media) or you get asked what’s new when really what’s being implied is when are you going to find someone, or that there must be something wrong with you if you haven’t found someone yet.

I am starting to feel overwhelmed by it all and freaking out at the same time as it just feels like I’m stuck on this crap single ride i can’t get off and online dating is doing my head!

I 100% feel your pain. I did buy a few months ago by myself though, I was sick of people saying "oh wait till you meet someone" - I've reached a point where I doubt I will actually meet anyone. I have up and down days, sometimes I am content but other days I really wish someone would be there to eat dinner with at night or go for a walk with. 4

I don't have any answers but you aren't alone!

 

[Likkleone]

My fellow singletons: How are you coping with being the “single one”?

At the moment it feels as though EVERYONE around is either pregnant, buying properties with their other half or getting engaged.

If it’s not on Facebook (lol) it’s over Instagram or it’s on WhatsApp.

Don’t get me wrong I am so happy for people in this life phase including my friends and family members who are all of the above including two of them getting engaged this weekend but at the same time I am really struggling with it all.

In my friendship group I am the only single one, living with parents and it’s just a bit disheartening especially when all that is discussed is boyfriends, babies, house, fiancés, wedding planning, double dates (which you get left out of and just see on social media) or you get asked what’s new when really what’s being implied is when are you going to find someone, or that there must be something wrong with you if you haven’t found someone yet.

I am starting to feel overwhelmed by it all and freaking out at the same time as it just feels like I’m stuck on this crap single ride i can’t get off and online dating is doing my head!

i know this feeling!! I’m just entering the ‘stage’ of seeing pregnancies and marriage regularly on my feed. I get really down seeing pregnancies if I’m honest as I’ve only recently come out of my relationship where this was in our plans.

However, I am honestly filling this time with all the things I’ve loved to have done in the past but either didn’t do because of my ex or felt nervous to do it!!

I believe we’ll all find someone, whether they’re the ‘one’ that’s a different question, so I’m essentially getting it all in until then! I also feel that when you put less pressure on yourself things tend to come into your life unexpectedly for the better. Searching on tinder and having meaningless conversations (mostly) only reminds me of the fact I don’t have someone I love to spend my time with. But doing all the things that make me happy and challenge me have been hugely beneficial.

When you’re feeling like this, try to limit your social media time. It’s not worth scrolling for hours comparing yourself to others, I’m terrible at this but it never ever makes me feel better so I have to stop it!

 

[under the ivy]

I’m nearing 30 & my longterm relationship ended a few month ago. People are moving in together, getting engaged, buying dogs together etc on my Insta and it does hurt. But I’m embracing single life it’s such a weird age to be. Part of you feels like a failure, part of you feels independent.

I’m going to let love find me. I’m not going looking for it anytime soon. If it happens it happens. If not, then so what!

 

[it’s not been changed?!]

 

[DivineIntervention]

Has anyone ever had a bad gut feeling about going on a first date and cancelled? With no evidence of why you should be cautious, not first date anxiety but just a gut feeling telling you not to go?

 

[ThreeSteaksPam]

Has anyone ever had a bad gut feeling about going on a first date and cancelled? With no evidence of why you should be cautious, not first date anxiety but just a gut feeling telling you not to go?

Me I did it literally this morning. Although it wasn’t a first date, it was someone I was seeing a bit last year but then I got with someone else, that all went to tit during lockdown and this other lad has been lurking around in the background ever since waiting for me to become single again. Which is sort of off putting in itself..

 

[Wowitsme]

I’m thinking of doing this, we’ve had 3 dates but I can’t shake the feeling he’s creepy and gives me an un easy feeling. I may be wrong but I have no idea and thinking I should just listen to my gut even if it may be wrong

 

[coconochanel]

I’m thinking of doing this, we’ve had 3 dates but I can’t shake the feeling he’s creepy and gives me an un easy feeling. I may be wrong but I have no idea and thinking I should just listen to my gut even if it may be wrong

Id say go with your gut. I must say though dating is bloody exhausting.

 

[under the ivy]

The thought of dating fills me with dread. I thought I’d be with my ex for life (hahaha) but he dumped me. Just can’t ever imagine putting myself out there ever again nor do I want to

 

[CynicalV]

It's difficult to imagine yourself trusting someone else isn't it. 3 years of abuse from a narcissistic sociopath will do that to you though I guess...

 

[it’s not been changed?!]

@CynicalV sorry, meant to “sad” react to your comment, not “like” it!!

 

[yankydoo]

Guys, been online dating for almost 1.5 years now. Just before lockdown I got to about 3 months with someone I liked but he dumped me.

Then met someone else. He’s (so far) what I’ve been looking for. He’s had 3 meltdowns now where he’s turned round and said he’s not sure what he wants blah blah blah. The first two were early on (tbh I didn’t care as it was so early and I just expect the worst now) and then the third one was after about 2.5 months of dating (This really upset me). he didn’t dump me but said he needed time to work out what he wants and requested space. He proceeded to message me the most he’s ever done and we met up the following week and something had definitely changed in him and he’s been lovely. It’s been about another month but not seen him for almost 3 weeks due to overlapping travels. Been messaging daily though.

Ive not come this far with online dating. Ive stopped dating others as I want to focus on him and it didn’t feel right. We haven’t had a conversation About our status and where we are going. If I’m being honest, I’m scared to bring it up Due to his meltdowns and also in my gut I feel it’s too early to have the convo. But I’ve missed him so much and I feel I need to bring it up. I don’t want to coast along aimlessly. Any help with the next steps?

i can feel he really likes me. he met my brother recently at a party and was lovely. in my gut I know any reservations he has are to do with commitment and not because he’s not into me.

sorry for typos And rambly post. I’m on my iPad and hard to type!

 

[it’s not been changed?!]

I matched with a guy on bumble on Tuesday. Tbh I only swiped him because I could tell it was him from his pixelated photo in my “beeline” He’s 5 years older than me (he’s 40) with 2 young sons. He extended the match within an hour of us matching, so I had 2 days instead of 24 hours to send the first message! keen. Anyway, we’ve only been messaging once a day and tbh I’m not bouncing off him conversation wise and it’s kind of put me off that he’s swapped his profile pic about 3 maybe 4 times. Who’s benefit is that for? To reel in other potential matches?! Ugh apps are like a cattle market. He sent me a message this morning telling me he was free tomorrow for a coffee, but I’m not feeling it. Anyone else get like this?!

Giving you all an update so he had sent the last 2 messages and I hadn’t replied. I think the last one was Saturday morning telling me he was free on bank hol mon to meet up. He’d at least stopped alternating his profile pic the last few days but then last night he sent me another message telling me he was coming off bumble and good luck in my quest.... I didn’t reply and that was half 11 last night. I’ve had a look this morning and he’s unmatched me. this is why i go for men my own age. A little bit older and they all come across intense

 

[yankydoo]

Giving you all an update so he had sent the last 2 messages and I hadn’t replied. I think the last one was Saturday morning telling me he was free on bank hol mon to meet up. He’d at least stopped alternating his profile pic the last few days but then last night he sent me another message telling me he was coming off bumble and good luck in my quest.... I didn’t reply and that was half 11 last night. I’ve had a look this morning and he’s unmatched me. this is why i go for men my own age. A little bit older and they all come across intense

Lol sounds like you're well rid!

Guys, been online dating for almost 1.5 years now. Just before lockdown I got to about 3 months with someone I liked but he dumped me.

Then met someone else. He’s (so far) what I’ve been looking for. He’s had 3 meltdowns now where he’s turned round and said he’s not sure what he wants blah blah blah. The first two were early on (tbh I didn’t care as it was so early and I just expect the worst now) and then the third one was after about 2.5 months of dating (This really upset me). he didn’t dump me but said he needed time to work out what he wants and requested space. He proceeded to message me the most he’s ever done and we met up the following week and something had definitely changed in him and he’s been lovely. It’s been about another month but not seen him for almost 3 weeks due to overlapping travels. Been messaging daily though.

Ive not come this far with online dating. Ive stopped dating others as I want to focus on him and it didn’t feel right. We haven’t had a conversation About our status and where we are going. If I’m being honest, I’m scared to bring it up Due to his meltdowns and also in my gut I feel it’s too early to have the convo. But I’ve missed him so much and I feel I need to bring it up. I don’t want to coast along aimlessly. Any help with the next steps?

i can feel he really likes me. he met my brother recently at a party and was lovely. in my gut I know any reservations he has are to do with commitment and not because he’s not into me.

sorry for typos And rambly post. I’m on my iPad and hard to type!

Doesn't dating make you guys just go crazy?! I said in this post we have been messaging daily but he has not replied to me for over a day now, and I had asked him a question. I know there are many reasons why - he's still on holiday - and it's not even that long but I can't help but feel crap. It's like walking on egg shells and no matter how hard you try not to get your hopes up or be mature, you just fall into this pit of uncertainty and self doubt.