Can't keep anything private can you, Mario. That's the narcissist in you 
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So if this tale of him encouraging claire and Alan to continue with fertility treatment is true, he’s literally just shared someones very private conversation and situation with thousands of people. What a wee wanker. Why does he think this is ok? And he thinks that people reading it will be impressed with him? No Marion, it just makes you look like a total narcissist.
I mean I know it is totally made up, as if anyone would share that kind of information with that wee scheme rat.
I mean I know it is totally made up, as if anyone would share that kind of information with that wee scheme rat.
No wonder he's exhausted - making up all those stories and typing essays are a fhull time job and nae debates! 
Who the duck does he think he is?
It's actually quite funny because he genuinely thinks he's some kind of agony aunt! I know none of these things happened but it's still funny that he thinks people will believe him!
Who the duck does he think he is?
It's actually quite funny because he genuinely thinks he's some kind of agony aunt! I know none of these things happened but it's still funny that he thinks people will believe him! He must surely make those stories up, who seriously watches him sit oan his arse swearing into the camera, wash his bedsheets a hunners times a week and go out eating average meals 24/7 and thinks “wow I am truly in the darkest of days but Mario is what gets me through”. Sorry but in a pit of depression or illness he’d tip me ower the edge. Get over yirsel hen. Deek needs to get him telt to wind his neck in, his hooter is well oot it’s ain lane
I mean who else would you speak about a fertility journey other than Mario. He's the obvious choice isn't he for these matters. I'm sure he knows all about the heartbreak, hormones, financial burden, anticipation, stress and pressure of this process.
Mario. duck off.
No one does. The whole story is definitely invented.
Not Claire and Alan. I Cannae.
I Cannae.
Another. Chapter in the book of things that didnae happen monocchio, is he saying he is responsible for the baby?
Monzo nightingale so aye hens
C.U.N.T
Monzo nightingale so aye hens
C.U.N.T
It really is worrying how deluded he is. Thinking the programme Hunted should be reaching out to him for their show as he’s a “big influencer”. Making up stories about how his foul mouthed rants have encouraged Claire and Alan to continue with their fertility journey. Saying he can’t share the private conversation and then proceeds to share the private conversation as he thinks it makes him sound like a saviour.
He’s one messed up wee creep.
He’s one messed up wee creep.
Maybe our resident artistical director @hopethishelpsallthebest could transform florence nightingale into monzo if yer no mop kicking yersel into this easter weekend ma luvlee so aye
I can’t share our convos but here’s her name, her partners name, she lives in the area he does, she’s having treatment for being ill. The only thing he didn’t reveal is who was on the top while the baby was conceived fs
Perhaps they’ll name the baby Mario or Marion. I mean. It’s the least they could do.
I think the only people actually watching him are doing so because the can't believe how weird he is.
He's definitely no influencer.
- He has the worst skin so can't promote skincare.
- Has no hair so can't promote haircare.
- He definitely can not promote anything beauty wise because the lash lift was non existent, the hair cut was bleeping crap and even when he has the driest lips - dandruff lips i call him. He looks orange anytime he wears makeup too, like a little fat oompa loompa from the famous choc factory.
- He has terrible taste in clothes that not even a blind Nikita dog would be interested in so he can't promote fashion.
- He can't cook and only eats beige food in the worst establishments so can't promote cooking or healthy eating.
- He lives in pencil case with no space anywhere for anymore shite so can't do interiors or anything about his prison cell.
- He has no outside area at all apart from the dog shite infested green in front of Beirut Towers so can't promote anything outdoorsy
- He doesn't clean, just surfaces cleans the worktops because there is so much clutter so he can't promote cleaning. Buying tit loads of floor cleaner & changing the bed doesn't count
So I do struggle to see what kind of account he is. Therefore I have to the decision he is a parody account and the only reason anyone watches him is for a daily dose of the laughs that Martin keeps on giving us. Everyday he comes out with something worse. He's absolutely mad
Aye, they goat fed up watching his doats of doom, so decided tae huv a shag #fact
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Dandruff lipsI think the only people actually watching him are doing so because the can't believe how weird he is.
He's definitely no influencer.
- He has the worst skin so can't promote skincare.
- Has no hair so can't promote haircare.
- He definitely can not promote anything beauty wise because the lash lift was non existent, the hair cut was bleeping crap and even when he has the driest lips - dandruff lips i call him. He looks orange anytime he wears makeup too, like a little fat oompa loompa from the famous choc factory.
- He has terrible taste in clothes that not even a blind Nikita dog would be interested in so he can't promote fashion.
- He can't cook and only eats beige food in the worst establishments so can't promote cooking or healthy eating.
- He lives in pencil case with no space anywhere for anymore shite so can't do interiors or anything about his prison cell.
- He has no outside area at all apart from the dog shite infested green in front of Beirut Towers so can't promote anything outdoorsy
- He doesn't clean, just surfaces cleans the worktops because there is so much clutter so he can't promote cleaning. Buying tit loads of floor cleaner & changing the bed doesn't count
So I do struggle to see what kind of account he is. Therefore I have to the decision he is a parody account and the only reason anyone watches him is for a daily dose of the laughs that Martin keeps on giving us. Everyday he comes out with something worse. He's absolutely mad
Oan yoursel hen, nail on the heed an awe that, no ma quoteI think the only people actually watching him are doing so because the can't believe how weird he is.
He's definitely no influencer.
- He has the worst skin so can't promote skincare.
- Has no hair so can't promote haircare.
- He definitely can not promote anything beauty wise because the lash lift was non existent, the hair cut was bleeping crap and even when he has the driest lips - dandruff lips i call him. He looks orange anytime he wears makeup too, like a little fat oompa loompa from the famous choc factory.
- He has terrible taste in clothes that not even a blind Nikita dog would be interested in so he can't promote fashion.
- He can't cook and only eats beige food in the worst establishments so can't promote cooking or healthy eating.
- He lives in pencil case with no space anywhere for anymore shite so can't do interiors or anything about his prison cell.
- He has no outside area at all apart from the dog shite infested green in front of Beirut Towers so can't promote anything outdoorsy
- He doesn't clean, just surfaces cleans the worktops because there is so much clutter so he can't promote cleaning. Buying tit loads of floor cleaner & changing the bed doesn't count
So I do struggle to see what kind of account he is. Therefore I have to the decision he is a parody account and the only reason anyone watches him is for a daily dose of the laughs that Martin keeps on giving us. Everyday he comes out with something worse. He's absolutely mad
Only way to describe them without making myself sick you see my lovely. Maybe because he has no hair he gets dandruff on his lips insteadDandruff lips
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xxxxxxignore the bad grammar and words I've missed out in parts, trying to decipher martin's posts on a daily basis has killed a brain cell or two hen so aye and so forth. he's a parody account, has to be. xxxxxxOan yoursel hen, nail on the heed an awe that, no ma quote
Maybe the dandruff lands on his lips from his eyebrows...or his facial hair....oh waitOnly way to describe them without making myself sick you see my lovely. Maybe because he has no hair he gets dandruff on his lips instead
ignore the bad grammar and words I've missed out in parts, trying to decipher martin's posts on a daily basis has killed a brain cell or two hen so aye and so forth. he's a parody account, has to be. xxxxxx
Bet her legs get dandruff. It always shocks me how hairy his legs are. Just don’t expect it on him
I think he's changed the Maws make to Claire but it's actually Michelle and Alan, you know Eric and Beth's neighboursNot Claire and Alan.
he's so full of tit
Odious little bleep. That's all.
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