Not gonna lie, I think Derek will get treated to a half pizza supper take away and a black orchid candle lit blowie if he's been a good boy and remembered to take his shoes off before entering the plush padded palace 
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has he gone for a black and white version of coronation street? Looks tacky as f*Ck
Maybe Melv will treat Derek to a bespoke hand job 
Not the walls I was expecting to be papered, but that is a busy busy print for that wee room 
Our Dez will be lucky if he gets a gob jobValentine's day tomorrow folks. We know our wee darling Dezza has treated Melv to a new dressing table, Melv has treated himself to a mega bulbed mirror for it, but does anyone think Melv will actually treat Dezza to something that's just for him?
Melv strikes me as the sort that will treat Dezza to something that also benefits himself, you know like "the Dominos is on me tonight, cos I love you so".
Guesses anyone?
Edited to add it will be a bespoke pizza and so forth
duck me! That is the worst thing I have ever seen and I was in 'NamNot the walls I was expecting to be papered, but that is a busy busy print for that wee room
Content idea alert. An x rated demo of what a sph2onge can mop up.Maybe Melv will treat Derek to a bespoke hand job
Too much???
Inspiration if they had a wee back and front door. Built from the groound up
Code blue code blue.
You have to live dammit. You are NOT dying on my watch lady
Oh god it's awful What happened to him not being able to show his kitchen journey til tomorrow night? Think someone's been reading here and realised what a cockwomble he is going on all his journeys
I wonder if the wallpaper woman from the other day is raging he's not promoting cheap ebay wallpaper haha
What happened to him not being able to show his kitchen journey til tomorrow night? Think someone's been reading here and realised what a cockwomble he is going on all his journeysI wonder if the wallpaper woman from the other day is raging he's not promoting cheap ebay wallpaper haha
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Right who the duck wants this fuckin wallapper wallpaper in their kitchen.... Fuckin Stevie Wonder
I'm fair ragin at him. My babycham isn't chilled in readiness!Oh god it's awful
I am genuinely speechless after seeing the kitchen decoration. Surely he doesn’t think that looks good? SURELY?
Nobody. NOBODY asked. I can guarantee it.
It's a good job my drinking night is a Thursday night, because I am living for the Melvin kitchen reveal right now 
Share my white lightning my love xx There is plenty of room on my park bench
Thank god there’s still a magnum of Prosecco in my fridge from Christmas. I am opening that bad boy and projecting his kitchen reveal onto my living room walls.
All are welcome to join me. I also have gin and schloer (for non drinkers).
All are welcome to join me. I also have gin and schloer (for non drinkers).
Where are our main witches @Frankensooze and @cleaningupthecrap ? They will be ragin' to miss this proper unveiling of Melvin's fablon castle kitchen
I'll bring the beige canapes. Can someone else sort the Whitney play list?
He has the brass neck to type that he paid the same.
AS IF SOME FUCKER IS GOING TO HIKE UP THE PRICE BECAUSE OF HIS INFLUENCE.
Melv, mate (we are mates now we're on this journee through hell together),the wallpaper will be half price tomorrow. No-one wants it, that's why it's on ebay for £7.99 you giant double ended dildo
AS IF SOME FUCKER IS GOING TO HIKE UP THE PRICE BECAUSE OF HIS INFLUENCE.
Melv, mate (we are mates now we're on this journee through hell together),the wallpaper will be half price tomorrow. No-one wants it, that's why it's on ebay for £7.99 you giant double ended dildo
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