I do hope that Derek realises he can do better and dumps his ass like toxic waste. Maz would lose his tit. I do think he treats Derek with little respect or care - just does whatever suits himself and doesn’t seem like there’s any regard for his “partner” (doesn’t seem like a partnership!)
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Aw this prick can get to duck today! I’m absolutely baffled as to why somebody would cook a potato cake in oil, don’t people do them in the toaster like I do or under the grill! 
honestly that turned my stomach! And I know it’s been said but he’s such a spoiled little witch he must just sit there moaning to poor derek n he gives in n gets him stuff just for an easy life, poor sod! 
honestly that turned my stomach! And I know it’s been said but he’s such a spoiled little witch he must just sit there moaning to poor derek n he gives in n gets him stuff just for an easy life, poor sod! 
Cosy is something I want to be in Autumn and Winter. I want comfy in Spring and summer. But that's our Melv - a man for no seasons!
He did buy him a shiny Trackie - I think it was in the colour white so when they dress like his n his, they fit the colour palette of the tat cave. The pop of pink is introduced by the fact that Melv is a bell end
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The cereal dispensers seem to be missing, which is strange given what he fancied this morning was something “not greasy”I don’t know where to begin todayNothing greasy
Two hash browns in the air fryer & two potato scones in a pot (WTAF?) absorbing a sea of vegetable oil like two thirsty sponges, all 4 of them battered right onto a white roll with lashings of HP
Ive an idea... have some bleeping cereal!!
Yasss got to fry tattie scone in oil its the only way, on a roll, square sausage, raw onion and tommy kDon’t want you all hating here but a fried tattie scone on a buttered roll is an absolute delight
Fried tattie scone if you're trying to shift a hangover, no tattie scone if you're trying to shift weightDon’t want you all hating here but a fried tattie scone on a buttered roll is an absolute delight
If you’re Scottish, there’s no other way to eat a tattie scone except fried! Yum. But Marion claiming he doesn’t want anything greasy then scoffing that 
he’s a professional troll, I’m sure.
he’s a professional troll, I’m sure.I've come to bed because I'm hormonal, hungry, missing my parents and feeling pissed aff with everything 
, so I'm going to try cheering myself up by watching his 101 make up stories, ma lovelies..... so aye! 
, so I'm going to try cheering myself up by watching his 101 make up stories, ma lovelies..... so aye! Who is Siobhan Procurer of Shelves and can we get her into a deprogramming session stat?
The fried tattie scones and a wee slice of black pudding are the reason I am now man mountain but still can’t say noFried tattie scone if you're trying to shift a hangover, no tattie scone if you're trying to shift weight
Don’t understand why the need to talk shite and say nothing greasy then shove that in your mouth! Big stodgy roll too!
Prototype candle jar?
Chanel working with Melv then. Good to know.
Chanel working with Melv then. Good to know.
Jesus Christ.... why in God's name does Mazza need that sheer amount of make up!? 
He's got like 2 of everything, bloody crazy! The only thing I fancy trying is some Aldi make up, I'd not pay silly prices for high end brands! He's honestly in a boujee, bespoke world of his own! 
He's got like 2 of everything, bloody crazy! The only thing I fancy trying is some Aldi make up, I'd not pay silly prices for high end brands! He's honestly in a boujee, bespoke world of his own! 
Yeah, that was weird. I presume he bought some knock off chanel stickers, maybe from the cereal box woman? He did seem to weirdly skim over that bit though.
Jesus Christ.... why in God's name does Mazza need that sheer amount of make up!?
I love how you went off, all innocent, to watch his stories. I wished I had time to warn you that you would come back on here all agitated Haha, aww thank you!Yeah, that was weird. I presume he bought some knock off chanel stickers, maybe from the cereal box woman? He did seem to weirdly skim over that bit though.
I was feeling fed up and annoyed before - now I'm baffled, amused and confused AS WELL! 
If I lived below Melvin and watched his 'stories' (which let's face it, everything that comes out of his mouth is fiction) I would be putting in for a new flat pronto.
His 'hoose' is like a real-life version of Buckaroo. It's just going to take one more sparkly grey piece of tat and the whole lot is going to go.
His 'hoose' is like a real-life version of Buckaroo. It's just going to take one more sparkly grey piece of tat and the whole lot is going to go.
Absolutely.. that's the way my wee granny did it and the way I still do it..Don’t want you all hating here but a fried tattie scone on a buttered roll is an absolute delight
Lots of oil.. no toaster! And I actually do have IBS
I’ve just sat here pissing myself for the last 10 minutes watching his for the laughs stories, the big bowls, “aye for a fuckin St bernard”, and being chased by a blind “Nikita” say what you like about our Marion but he’s fuckin hilarious
No longer hunners of messages now my lovelies, it’s now thousands all because he shared his make-up.
No Marion, you are just trying to make yourself seem more important. Why, because Hannah no longer needs you to flog her wax melts. She has traded you in for newer models in the name of TDIL.
No Marion, you are just trying to make yourself seem more important. Why, because Hannah no longer needs you to flog her wax melts. She has traded you in for newer models in the name of TDIL.
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