That bastard Ian hangs his bleep washings in the living room.This bleep needs tae see a doactur, that amount of sleep for a 40 yer auld who only works 4 hoors a week, has nae weans, or real responsibilities, it's no normal. Suhin wrang wi him, either that it he's the laziest bastard Ian the planet.
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FFS phone dain me durty again. When the contract oan this phone is up I'll definitely no be getting a Google pixel phone again
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Have youse still got them lilac leggings?
Perfection takes time, practice makes ok. Think it's a quote from Dalai Lama ma lovelie
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Madge is now deleting her first OG Cleaning_wi_Madge notebook post oan that app that isnae her joab.No because how bleeping dull must your life be to make an Instagram story about buying a notebook!?! Most of us (normal humans) just buy notepads without a second thought. Absolute sad sacks need validation for buying a cheap arse notebook!
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A pyoor stapul tae wear wi ma Gucci badboy trainers.
Today ah'm booked in fur a Nathan Todd haircut, then gawn fur brunch at China Sea Restaurant, then on tae the Barras tae see Danyell fur a collab fur the Madge bed, also. The Daily Record ur coming tae dae an article oan me so ah kin act aw surprised when ah get ma blue tick.
#moapkick
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That door handle 
Jesus H Christ
Utterly bespoke and so forth also
Jesus H Christ
Utterly bespoke and so forth also
Bet he disny even need to buy a full tin of paint to do his hallway, a tester pot probably covers it
Snakes oan that app, he seen us discuss his handles the other day. That bleeping gap at the top where the old handle was looks so bespoke and utter bougie vibes
duck me, I need my sleep and could sometimes sleep standing up12 hours fecking sleep
but I work mare than 4 hours a week and have a lot going on, which means I sometimes go to bed to zone out because if I'm sleeping I'm not worrying 
but that's bloody ridiculous for someone who does such little and has a bleeping easy life with no commitments! 
Has Marlon died and been reincarnated as a Sloth? π¦₯He needs a collab wi a
duck me, I need my sleep and could sometimes sleep standing up
The way he carries on about being so busy and tired really rips my knitting.
He has no clue about the reality of an exhausting stressful day in the real world.
Long lie, wipe a surface, stroll to work mid morning for a few hours, stroll home, eat processed food or takeaway, tap face with out of date skincare, pout in mirror, sleep.
Genuinely the most overwhelming part of his week is hanging the washing, and even then, with only two of them living there, he has a tiny amount of washing compared to families with multiple human weans.
Baffling. I think he thinks heβs being relatable? But itβs just offensive tbh. False equivalence ya Fanny!
Madge ma lovely, he IS a knob business and nae debates
Always big up your pals?????
Martin, you had to bleeping buy a ticket to see her when she went to Glasgow - she isn't your pal
They have met twice - once when he had to pay to stand in a queue to see her, and another when wax melt woman brought him along. How sad to be making out she is your friend hahahaha
I'm sure they don't even have each others numbers - they just communicate through that vile app that isn't his job.
New York in Amerca
Blind Nikita Dug
Factual
bleep's washings
Also.
* high footfall areaBet he disny even need to buy a full tin of paint to do his hallway, a tester pot probably covers it
How can I change my name on here
Mines boring compared to you lot
Help plz
Name suggestions welcome also
Mines boring compared to you lot
Help plz
Name suggestions welcome also
I don't think you can anymore
I want mine changed to NewYorkInAmerica-Also.Can we make another account or isnβt it allowedI don't think you can anymore
thatβs a good one
I like
Worth my weight in gold - also
Can we make another account or isnβt it allowed
thatβs a good one
I like
Worth my weight in gold - also
love it.I think I tried to look a few weeks back and read somewhere no more name changes but maybe admin will see this and take pity on us
New York in America
Also
xxxx
I've long wanted mine to be changed to @blindnikitadug.....Can we make another account or isnβt it allowed
thatβs a good one
I like
Worth my weight in gold - also
Oo yes, Iβd like mine to be CuntWashingsAlso
I think I tried to look a few weeks back and read somewhere no more name changes but maybe admin will see this and take pity on us
New York in America
Also
xxxx
I'd go for Debbie Harris
I think these suggestions give admin/ mods a real reason to allow our user name changes as much as Marioooooo changes his sofas, aye
New York - America
Also
New York - America
Also
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