Cleaning with Mario #105 Jizz on his face, he’s a big disgrace, waving his snail snot all over the place

[HappyLittleSnail]

It’s “gone by”!! I hate it so much when people say went, when they mean gone.
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Tattle ads trolling Mario today. What happened to the Ugg slippers again?? Why would you wear £2 ikea sliders when you have Ugg slippers?

 

[Bluebellsinthewoods]

I bet he gets a wee braid on his 3 strands doon the beach.

 

[Tinkerbell cat]

Well hello my lovelies, hope you're all well. I've been off this the past week as I've been in that wee bespoke city of Krakow. Couldn't and didn't want to read Martin's threads as was feared of seeing any selfies of him and didn't want to be sick.
Have I missed anything really exciting hens? Like a cheeky castle avicci? Maybe a wee bed sheet change? Wax melt haul? More idiotic spending on tat?

 

[HappyLittleSnail]

Well hello my lovelies, hope you're all well. I've been off this the past week as I've been in that wee bespoke city of Krakow. Couldn't and didn't want to read Martin's threads as was feared of seeing any selfies of him and didn't want to be sick.
Have I missed anything really exciting hens? Like a cheeky castle avicci? Maybe a wee bed sheet change? Wax melt haul? More idiotic spending on tat?

Scroll back to the last pages of the last thread so see some truly epic Bespoke drinking vessels for his year away holibobs.

 

[Tinkerbell cat]

Scroll back to the last pages of the last thread so see some truly epic Bespoke drinking vessels for his year away holibobs.

I am raging I've missed this There won't be any room in his case with the amount of shite he's bought so far. Imagine cutting about the pool with those cups like a 12yr old girl Oh I would love to be a fly around that pool next year watching these two idiots. I would be scunderd handing that cup over to the bar man

 

[AllieBee]

Hen, it just doesn’t make sense. Husband and I are taking our kiddo to that place Abroad in a few weeks and I haven’t bought ANYTHING. We already have summer clothes and I’ll get the kiddo some pool toys here because it’ll probably be cheaper. I’ll bring some of our usual SPF for the wean because he’s got bespoke sensitivity of the night highest spectrum skin. Job done!

I'm going to abroad in just under two weeks, I've bought nothing! Not even dragged my cases out the attic. Nor have I bought myself a toddler cup with my name on it. And I didn't wash my trainers last year and pack them away because I only have one pair of trainers, not being wasteful like Maria who buys a new pair every week.

 

[peachy-keen]

Ma hens I've been at my job that is my job the day and this wee slug nearly got me in bother. Company failed a visit and my boss said to us all "these are all things you should know and if you don't know, get to know!" Holding in the giggles was actually painful

aw hen, practice makes ok xx

 

[Sloppys]

Im avoiding the canaries at all costs next year. Imagine trying to relax on your sun bed from your actual fuhl time joab and these pair of saddos are mincing around you with their primark cups wearing their garish kiddies co ord sets. They'll probs smell all musty aswell seen as their suitcases have been packed 18 months before take aff. It's just no fur me.

 

[YR80]

I’m doing holidays all wrong lovelies. I go to that wee place abroad in about 2 weeks and I only got the case down from the attic yesterday and that was only because I panicked that two large cases won’t fit in the boot of the car. Me and my husband are getting a few bits of top-up clothes today. I feel I’m missing out by not packing last year.

As for books, I’ve just looked at all the ones I have on my shelves and pulled out any that I’ve been meaning to read and not got round to it yet. Sorted. Should I have bought one of this years bestsellers and then stored it for next year? I’m just doing it wrong.

 

[HappyLittleSnail]

I am raging I've missed this There won't be any room in his case with the amount of shite he's bought so far. Imagine cutting about the pool with those cups like a 12yr old girl Oh I would love to be a fly around that pool next year watching these two idiots. I would be scunderd handing that cup over to the bar man

The only time it's EVER acceptable to, as a grown adult, hand your own cup over is when you're getting a coffee and they give you 50p off for bringing your own cup.

 

[menopausalmargrit]

I can't get my head round this buying all tour holiday stuff a year out. What's going to happen if deek finally hits puberty and has a growth spurt into size 13-14? Primark might no let him return the PlayStation swimming trunks that far out

Don’t forget that he bought his EUROS nearly a month ago!!!

 

[YR80]

I still reckon Mario is going to Lanza this year and will pop on when he’s back with a “So, we did a thing. Needed to keep it quiet because I didn’t want my security to be compromised”

 

[blueblue]

I know we all love a holiday, but in Derren Brown's book Happy he talks about how holidays are one way people strive for happiness then arrive and realise they are still the same individual just in a different part of the world. It's why being content and grateful for small, routine activities and generally working on your own innate happiness is what the real, formally qualified therapists explore.

 

[hopethishelpsallthebest]

A passport holder, in pink. Labels on their cases. Cabin bags that (hopefully) are too big to be allowed in the cabin. One of those neck cushion thingies. A straw hat.

Nah. Can't think what you mean also.
Oor two boujee beejons would never, so aye.

 

[SuzyE]

I'm sounding as thick as Mario here, but what the feck does August feel like?! Fresh to me would be autumn, but it's still summer.

 

[Daisy Uncle]

Nah. Can't think what you mean also.
Oor two boujee beejons would never, so aye.

View attachment 2353295

When they arrive the customs guy is going to say to Deek, seňor you can't bring an anteater into the country.

 

[peachy-keen]

I'm sounding as thick as Mario here, but what the feck does August feel like?! Fresh to me would be autumn, but it's still summer.
View attachment 2353307

did he just…cancel autumn??

 

[twilightgarden]

Imagine them on Nothing to Declare.
“Sorry sir you can’t being toxic wax melts into the country”

 

[HappyLittleSnail]

I'm sounding as thick as Mario here, but what the feck does August feel like?! Fresh to me would be autumn, but it's still summer.
View attachment 2353307

I think he means there's fresh air outside of his little shoe box that's filled to the rafters with wax melts, scented candles and reed diffusers. Hope that helps xx

 

[Bluebellsinthewoods]

I know we all love a holiday, but in Derren Brown's book Happy he talks about how holidays are one way people strive for happiness then arrive and realise they are still the same individual just in a different part of the world. It's why being content and grateful for small, routine activities and generally working on your own innate happiness is what the real, formally qualified therapists explore.

I like to call it same tit, different location
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When they arrive the customs guy is going to say to Deek, seňor you can't bring an anteater into the country.

Ffs nearly spat my tea across the High footfall area