Shared by a parent on Instagram.
Yes, good luck with the lifestyle that YOU chose.
Yes, good luck with the lifestyle that YOU chose.
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Exactly.Shared by a parent on Instagram.
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Yes, good luck with the lifestyle that YOU chose.
Oh you great big martyr
! I'm sitting here with my feet up, browsing tattle and drinking coffee.I’m glad I had a mum who didn’t complain about me on social media and had the grace to do it with her friends and family behind my backShared by a parent on Instagram.
View attachment 2889013
Yes, good luck with the lifestyle that YOU chose.
I never once heard my mum say anything bad about being a parent, she loves being a mum and that made me feel really wanted, loved and secure. I do feel sorry for kids whose parents do nothing but complain. Some people I know/have seen on social media say stuff like ‘my child(ren) ruined my life/holiday/weekend/day’ and sometimes that they resent them for it - hmmm no, you did, you chose to have them, they’re children, they’re being children it’s not fair to resent them for that.
Had a bit of a heart to heart with my dad today and it’s the first time I mentioned not wanting to have kids and he was so supportive 
makes a change from everyone else saying I’ll regret it
He just demanded grandcats instead which I’ll be happy to oblige
makes a change from everyone else saying I’ll regret it He just demanded grandcats instead which I’ll be happy to oblige
Tempted to post this in response
Honestly, I was in Asda earlier and two little girls were actively competing with how loudly they could scream and trying to harmonise with each other whilst doing it 🫨🫨🫨
What did their parents do? “Girls if you don’t stop, we won’t buy any sweets”
for gods sake. I bet they did buy the sweets and they didn’t stop I could hear them when I went a few aisles away.Kids don’t fear their parents anymore, at all and to be honest I think it’s necessary
I wasn’t scared of my mother as a person, I adored her and I still do… but I was terrified of the consequences of disobeying her. If I’d have acted like that I’d have been hauled out of there and sent straight to bed for the rest of the day!I grew up with a parent constantly telling me how i was a mistake, they never wanted me, they wished me dead (or sometimes themselves to get away from meI’m glad I had a mum who didn’t complain about me on social media and had the grace to do it with her friends and family behind my back
I never once heard my mum say anything bad about being a parent, she loves being a mum and that made me feel really wanted, loved and secure. I do feel sorry for kids whose parents do nothing but complain. Some people I know/have seen on social media say stuff like ‘my child(ren) ruined my life/holiday/weekend/day’ and sometimes that they resent them for it - hmmm no, you did, you chose to have them, they’re children, they’re being children it’s not fair to resent them for that.
), i ruined their life etc etc... yeah I wonder why I don't want kids now!I’m really sorry for what you went through. This is why I get angry when people tell me ‘everyone’ should have children, no they shouldn’t!I grew up with a parent constantly telling me how i was a mistake, they never wanted me, they wished me dead (or sometimes themselves to get away from me
"It's different when it's your own"
"unconditional love"
I have had people nearly knock me out cos i like to say "oh there's that unconditional love again" when i see parents in the news after killing their kids
the truth hurts, I guess!
twit, that’s all!Shared by a parent on Instagram.
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Yes, good luck with the lifestyle that YOU chose.
The only unconditional love I need is for my two furry babies, even if one hates me in return…
Mama Noddy last week decided to impart the words ‘well you know I love you and everything, but if your dad hadn’t worn me down I’d never have had kids’ (at least she only had the one!). Thankfully she still hates children so at least that means no pressure for any grandkids!
Mama Noddy last week decided to impart the words ‘well you know I love you and everything, but if your dad hadn’t worn me down I’d never have had kids’ (at least she only had the one!). Thankfully she still hates children so at least that means no pressure for any grandkids!
I don’t believe in unconditional love, so people telling me I’ll never have it doesn’t matter to me.
My mum is my biggest advocate for my childfree life
Don’t get me wrong I absolutely adore my mum, especially since my dad passed 24 years ago and it’s just been us two, but she seriously struggles with the boundaries between being a mother and a friend/fun auntie. We’ve had so many arguments over the years around her obligations (eg no, you can’t actually leave me after a general anaesthetic, I do need you there 24 hours in case I die!). But we muddle along just fine. I’m under no illusions that she was never made to have kids thoughMy mum is my biggest advocate for my childfree life
I'm happy for you, I love my mother but I've often listened to what a burden I was in one way or another whenever she was in a bad mood and it really messes with the head of a child. I hope these martyr parents don't reflect this air of misery to their children.
And @ the OP of that post, if the kids are complaining about the "fun" thing you're doing, maybe stop trying to turn every free moment into an event and let them get bored and learn to entertain themselves. Just a thought
I’m really sorry you went through that, it’s awful. It’s exactly why everyone shouldn’t be a parents and parents should complain anonymously or away from their children.I'm happy for you, I love my mother but I've often listened to what a burden I was in one way or another whenever she was in a bad mood and it really messes with the head of a child. I hope these martyr parents don't reflect this air of misery to their children.
And @ the OP of that post, if the kids are complaining about the "fun" thing you're doing, maybe stop trying to turn every free moment into an event and let them get bored and learn to entertain themselves. Just a thought
And I agree with you about everything not having to be some huge #MakingMemories event, just let them be!
I'm hoping it's ok to post asking for some advice in this thread as I don't really know where else to vent! I have a friend, C who I've known since we were about 2 (I'm 31). We've been friends but also had different life paths/she's very opposite to me (shes Christian, never smoked, drugs etc, small C conservative). 2 years ago I moved counties to where she also is, and had her kids (twins). I saw them when they were young but it's pissing me off that in the 2 years we've never met up just us 2. She said before she would come down to (my town), but because I don't have a living room she wouldn't be able to bring the girls down She has a husband, why tf can't he look after them and we go out for coffee? Why can't we go out for drinks? It's ALWAYS me going up to her town, and then all we do is go round her house. I can't talk to her because it's always the girls feeding/nap time/entertaining them. I'm "Aunty__" then to top it all off for the last 7 months whenever she rings its for a 2 hour monologue about some family drama, every time. I dread answering her phone calls, she doesn't seem to give a tit about anything going on in my life. I was telling her about my recent trip abroad and she wasn't even listening. I'm not a bleeping counsellor! Its so one sided. We have nothing in common anymore, and I don't enjoy spending time with her and the kids, and the one time she did come to a works leaving do without them.all she did was bang on about them. Shes unhealthily attached to them theh wonders why they don't do well around others - you're not socialising them or making them used to other people!?? I'm not into kids but because I'm generally ok with hers for a few hours its "ou you'll be a great mum" I say "I don't really want kids" and shes all like "oh i was like that before I had them". No!!?! It's exhausting, I don't want to go round to see them ffs.
How can I cut contact slowly when we have mutual work friends in common, and I do like her I just feel like we've outgrown each other. She doesn't know the half of my life really?
Also everyone at my work has kids/wants kids and it's insufferable. Talking of work I needed medical time off for a colposcopy + biopsy last year but did I get it? Nooo! When I was booking it I said to the team oh I'm having to use annual leave or flexi and they said "what but its a medical procedure", I said yeah our policy says women are only allowed it if they're pregnant. bleeping riles me.
/end rant.
She has a husband, why tf can't he look after them and we go out for coffee? Why can't we go out for drinks? It's ALWAYS me going up to her town, and then all we do is go round her house. I can't talk to her because it's always the girls feeding/nap time/entertaining them. I'm "Aunty__" then to top it all off for the last 7 months whenever she rings its for a 2 hour monologue about some family drama, every time. I dread answering her phone calls, she doesn't seem to give a tit about anything going on in my life. I was telling her about my recent trip abroad and she wasn't even listening. I'm not a bleeping counsellor! Its so one sided. We have nothing in common anymore, and I don't enjoy spending time with her and the kids, and the one time she did come to a works leaving do without them.all she did was bang on about them. Shes unhealthily attached to them theh wonders why they don't do well around others - you're not socialising them or making them used to other people!?? I'm not into kids but because I'm generally ok with hers for a few hours its "ou you'll be a great mum" I say "I don't really want kids" and shes all like "oh i was like that before I had them". No!!?! It's exhausting, I don't want to go round to see them ffs.How can I cut contact slowly when we have mutual work friends in common, and I do like her I just feel like we've outgrown each other. She doesn't know the half of my life really?
Also everyone at my work has kids/wants kids and it's insufferable. Talking of work I needed medical time off for a colposcopy + biopsy last year but did I get it? Nooo! When I was booking it I said to the team oh I'm having to use annual leave or flexi and they said "what but its a medical procedure", I said yeah our policy says women are only allowed it if they're pregnant.
bleeping riles me./end rant.
I'm hoping it's ok to post asking for some advice in this thread as I don't really know where else to vent! I have a friend, C who I've known since we were about 2 (I'm 31). We've been friends but also had different life paths/she's very opposite to me (shes Christian, never smoked, drugs etc, small C conservative). 2 years ago I moved counties to where she also is, and had her kids (twins). I saw them when they were young but it's pissing me off that in the 2 years we've never met up just us 2. She said before she would come down to (my town), but because I don't have a living room she wouldn't be able to bring the girls down
How can I cut contact slowly when we have mutual work friends in common, and I do like her I just feel like we've outgrown each other. She doesn't know the half of my life really?
Also everyone at my work has kids/wants kids and it's insufferable. Talking of work I needed medical time off for a colposcopy + biopsy last year but did I get it? Nooo! When I was booking it I said to the team oh I'm having to use annual leave or flexi and they said "what but its a medical procedure", I said yeah our policy says women are only allowed it if they're pregnant.
/end rant.
I have a ‘friend’ who I’ve known a long time. We’ve been there for each other through some really tough times. She now has 2 young kids. In the past year, we’ve seen each other once and she had child with her and was pregnant with 2. I’ve tried to arrange a couple of times to meet up but she cancels on me last minute. I no longer text her and we’ve not spoken for months. I’m currently having a really tough time mentally which I’m struggling to talk to anyone about, in the past I would have reached out to her and we’d have gone out for a drink, a walk or anything but I can’t. Another of my friends has also recently had a baby and I haven’t seen her or baby since as I can’t bare to be asked to hold it when I have zero interest. Other friends are off travelling, high flying careers etc and I am finding right now super tough. I’ll muddle through and don’t need the help of crisis line or anything so please don’t think that CF tribe
My friend once said people are either drains or radiators, they just drain your energy or radiate you and bring something to your life! I think you just need to stop making the effort to go to her, if she asks about meeting, say sure, do you want to come for a drink, etc. If she says no, then you can respond like ah ok, no bother.I'm hoping it's ok to post asking for some advice in this thread as I don't really know where else to vent! I have a friend, C who I've known since we were about 2 (I'm 31). We've been friends but also had different life paths/she's very opposite to me (shes Christian, never smoked, drugs etc, small C conservative). 2 years ago I moved counties to where she also is, and had her kids (twins). I saw them when they were young but it's pissing me off that in the 2 years we've never met up just us 2. She said before she would come down to (my town), but because I don't have a living room she wouldn't be able to bring the girls down
How can I cut contact slowly when we have mutual work friends in common, and I do like her I just feel like we've outgrown each other. She doesn't know the half of my life really?
Also everyone at my work has kids/wants kids and it's insufferable. Talking of work I needed medical time off for a colposcopy + biopsy last year but did I get it? Nooo! When I was booking it I said to the team oh I'm having to use annual leave or flexi and they said "what but its a medical procedure", I said yeah our policy says women are only allowed it if they're pregnant.
/end rant.
Ah she sounds like such a downer!I'm hoping it's ok to post asking for some advice in this thread as I don't really know where else to vent! I have a friend, C who I've known since we were about 2 (I'm 31). We've been friends but also had different life paths/she's very opposite to me (shes Christian, never smoked, drugs etc, small C conservative). 2 years ago I moved counties to where she also is, and had her kids (twins). I saw them when they were young but it's pissing me off that in the 2 years we've never met up just us 2. She said before she would come down to (my town), but because I don't have a living room she wouldn't be able to bring the girls down
How can I cut contact slowly when we have mutual work friends in common, and I do like her I just feel like we've outgrown each other. She doesn't know the half of my life really?
Also everyone at my work has kids/wants kids and it's insufferable. Talking of work I needed medical time off for a colposcopy + biopsy last year but did I get it? Nooo! When I was booking it I said to the team oh I'm having to use annual leave or flexi and they said "what but its a medical procedure", I said yeah our policy says women are only allowed it if they're pregnant.
/end rant.
Some things I've found helpful for phasing out draining friends...
When they say 'we should meet up soon', I used to reply with dates I was free but now I just say 'yes we'll have to do a meet up soon' and then the idea just dies a death without any plans being made. But I don't seem unfriendly. If they push for dates, say 'let me see in a few weeks, it's a busy time coming up with some weekends away and work stuff' and then just don't take it further.
And if she calls you with her dramas, you could answer but go 'sorry, just getting in the car/ the train/into the supermarket and only have a minute'. After a few times of that she won't use you as a go-to person to moan to.