I’m petrified of heights and water. But I have an irrational fear that I’m going to throw myself or my belongings off the edge. I live near water and there’s a popular walk around the river, I have to walk pressed against the wall as far away as possible, hold on to my boyfriend and he has to take all of my things off of me, I can’t even have my phone in my pocket.
There’s been times he has taken his own phone out and I’ve been so scared I was gonna bat it out his hand in to the water
I don’t know why I would ever throw anything or myself over but I honestly crawl up inside myself at the thought and urge that I’m going to do it