I don’t think anyone would bash you for this.I have lots of regrets but one of my biggest ones is that in my early 20s after uni I started going out with a guy who was black. At the time I was friends with a really toxic group of people who just weren't pleasant but because we had been through uni together and worked in the same field I was really preoccupied with staying friends with them. They were all couples and very stuck up and were also very racist as became apparent.
Their constant digs and judgement meant I broke things off with him. Not saying he would have been the love of my life or anything like that, I mean who knows? But I am so angry with myself sometimes when I think about it that I let this horrible group of people influence me like this because that wasn't my opinion, or values. I'm Irish as well and they used to be so horrible about it I was basically the running joke of the group.
What I don't regret is "falling out with them"...the world didn't end and after a few months I realised duck them they were awful people. I often pay too much attention to what people think but this is my biggest regret that instead of just telling them to duck off I dumped this poor guy and he was lovely!!! And gorgeous! And I liked him! That should have been enough!
Please don't bash me I've done it enough to myself over the years!
I’m sorry this happened to you and him. That’s really unfair.
it’s great that you have got that toxic group away from you: they weren’t friends and you definitely don’t need them.
Can completely understand you beating yourself up over the years but please don’t. By your post you clearly don’t hold those views and sought to remedy the situation by getting rid of that friend group. Now you know that if you ever met a black/POC man and were interested in a relationship that nothing would hold you back.