Hi everyone!
I wrote on here the other day, but deleted it straight after because I got scared. I only usually go on this website to take the piss, but might as well use it as a community now that this thread is here.
My husband had cancer and has no sperm. So we will be going through fertility treatment user a donor sperm as soon as the clinics will re-open. We have decided to pay for private treatment rather than waiting on the NHS.
We will be having (up to) 3 rounds of IUI and then maybe consider IVF if they dont work. The donor we will be picking will have the same features (or as close to) that we both have and only very few friends will know the baby is a donor baby.
But I came on to say that I have suffered horrendously with comments from someone who has been my best best friend for 10 years. We tell each other everything. She is 9 years older than me and well into her 40's and has never gotten married or had children. Which is absolutely normal and perfectly reasonable, as everyone lives a different life.
But when I confided in her and told her I desperately wanted to be a mother (ive never been pregnant before), and told her our plans to go about doing it, I was knocked off my feet with her reaction. She told me that I was "bleeping with nature" by using a sperm donor, and then really pushed the boat out and said "having children is disgusting" and "I cant think of anything worse than growing a baby inside of me, makes me feel sick"
WTF!!! I drove home in floods of tears. This clearly isn't someone that I now want to continue a friendship with and I am now almost grieving a 10 year friendship. I could not believe her comments. My husband thinks its a hard hit of jealously and she is reacting in a very defensive way because shes never met someone and had children of her own?... I have no idea, all I know is her comments were very uncalled for, and hurtful.
I wasn't expecting everyone we told to be delighted for us, but for someone who's been my best friend for 10 years, we expected at least a degree of support!!!! But to say to my face that its "disgusting" and "I cant think of anything worse", makes me feel sick and my stomach gets in knots whenever I think about it. To think that I now wont share this exciting journey with a friend hurts me so much. But im not having negativity to that extent in my life - we've been through enough.
Sorry for the massive rant, but I wanted to give my story across as I will be open on this forum and it has shown how supportive people can be
xx Love to you all xx