Toddler advice thread

[Jellybean093]

Does anyone have any good toddler recipe books to recommend? I pull out my hair regularly at how little interested in food my little girl is and i struggle to know what to give her. I’m running low on ideas of things she will actually eat!!!

I don’t have recommendations, as my toddler is exactly the same he’s amazing with breakfast, after that, he won’t really eat. We’ve tried everything! We sit down together, and I don’t let anyone else get up until he’s eaten as when he sees them get up, he gets up, we’ve changed plates, I’ve tried all different foods, nothing! I might be lucky if I get a brioche down him at lunch time

 

[BettyCrockerr]

Does anyone have any good toddler recipe books to recommend? I pull out my hair regularly at how little interested in food my little girl is and i struggle to know what to give her. I’m running low on ideas of things she will actually eat!!!

Have you tried taking her shopping?? Take her to the supermarket and get her to pick a few items - guide her to the fruit & veg/meat etc - talk her through what things are, what you can make with them and let her shop - make an event of it. Then let her help make dinner - something simple like homemade pizzas - use shop bought dough or use ore made bases but let her put the topping on/put it in the oven etc

Get her exited about food and cooking and the excitement about eating will come.

id also suggest making a big pot of something that you can put in the middle of the table and let everyone take a portion - including your daughter. Sometimes having a bit of control over it might be the thing that helps?

 

[Definitelyme]

Does anyone have any good toddler recipe books to recommend? I pull out my hair regularly at how little interested in food my little girl is and i struggle to know what to give her. I’m running low on ideas of things she will actually eat!!!

A girl a follow on Instagram has a book out, the Instagram is Zayne’s plate, so you can probably find it on there. I don’t have it, but sometimes make the recipes she posts on Instagram and they are always good.

 

[imtakingabath]

Hi everyone,

Does anyone have advice on helping to teach a very boisterous 2 year old boy on how to walk alongside me safely?

My son is exactly 2.5 years and I am having to use reins, or the pram still with him as I absolutely cannot trust him to walk alongside me safely. He will bolt, and refuses to hold my hand. Doesn't seem to retain any concept of road safety.
I've got a small baby too, who I'm currently putting in a sling so I can use the pram for my son. This makes it even more difficult as the sling means if he does bolt I struggle to run after him! Any tips?
Am I expecting too much? I see similar aged and younger walking alongside their parents, but he just won't do it.
He is smart for his age, and his language is very developed but there is no reasoning with him at all

Oh wow, I feel like I could have written your post myself (except we don’t have another child yet!) it made me feel better about my son’s behaviour. I think giving them more freedom to run freely in the park etc is a good idea so I’ll try to do that more often.

Does anyone have any good toddler recipe books to recommend? I pull out my hair regularly at how little interested in food my little girl is and i struggle to know what to give her. I’m running low on ideas of things she will actually eat!!!

My son’s favourite recipes both come from the Healthy Little Foodies blog. He doesn’t like meat texture, and seems to prefer strong flavours, so I tried the red lentil curry and the vegetarian chilli and they’ve been our go tos ever since. Obviously your daughter’s preferences will be different but worth a look to see if anything seems suitable!

 

[bottombanana]

I’m potty training my nearly 2.5 year old for just over a month. He’s amazing when he’s not wearing anything on his bottom half, he’ll take himself off to the potty when he needs it. He’s doing quite well in trousers at home, he’ll have the odd accident but they’re really infrequent. However, the moment we go out or he goes to nursery he has more wet accidents than successes (he very rarely if ever poos his pants) even when we remind him of the potty or take him to sit down and try. Sometimes he’ll wet himself straight after we’ve taken him to the toilet. I always make him stop and change his trousers and pants before he’s allowed to carry on playing, we give him loads of praise when he does go on the potty, he has a special sticker chart that he colours in for each time he goes to the toilet. Is there anything I could be doing to help him when we’re out and about?
I’m at a bit of a loss and am starting to feel like I’m doing something wrong because I don’t think we’ve had any success in the potty when we’re out

 

[saltandvinegarcrisps]

Sounds like he's not ready, my toddler potty trained in a couple of days just after he turned 3. He was never keen to sit on his potty and always asked for his nappy on so I never really pushed it, but once he turned 3 and I think moved class in his nursery helped too as he was around bigger kids... he just did it.

since training he's had 1 accident a few days after starting, been fine at nursery and never when out or in the car. But it was so easy and he just got it ( I was starting to worry he was a bit old for nappies and would talk to him about being a big boy and big boys use the potty etc but no pushing it) he's also completely dry at night and holds it until the morning. We used bedtime pull ups for a week or so after he potty trained but they were always dry so just let him wear his boxers instead as that is what he asked for.

I would say don't worry about putting a nappy on if he's constantly wetting himself, scared using unfamiliar toilets or when distracted, he will get it once he's ready.

 

[BettyCrockerr]

I’m potty training my nearly 2.5 year old for just over a month. He’s amazing when he’s not wearing anything on his bottom half, he’ll take himself off to the potty when he needs it. He’s doing quite well in trousers at home, he’ll have the odd accident but they’re really infrequent. However, the moment we go out or he goes to nursery he has more wet accidents than successes (he very rarely if ever poos his pants) even when we remind him of the potty or take him to sit down and try. Sometimes he’ll wet himself straight after we’ve taken him to the toilet. I always make him stop and change his trousers and pants before he’s allowed to carry on playing, we give him loads of praise when he does go on the potty, he has a special sticker chart that he colours in for each time he goes to the toilet. Is there anything I could be doing to help him when we’re out and about?
I’m at a bit of a loss and am starting to feel like I’m doing something wrong because I don’t think we’ve had any success in the potty when we’re out

I don’t think he’s ready yet for toilet training. If you’ve been at it for over a month and he’s still not able to stay dry under normal day to day circumstances I’d stop trying for now and give it another shot in a month or so.

my honest advice is, get rid of the potty completely. Give it a month or so and then start trying him on the toilet. Spend a full weekend at home, put him in proper pants and trousers etc and just go back and forth to the toilet every 15minutes or so initially - go through the routine of pulling clothes down, sitting on the loo, even if he doesn’t do anything go through the routine of flushing the toilet, washing hands etc.
He will wet himself and go through umpteen pairs of pants trousers etc but it should click after a few days of that - if he’s ready. It won’t take weeks and certainly not over a month. At the moment your boy just isn’t there yet - which is fine. Take your foot off the gas, try it again in April/May.

 

[bottombanana]

Should he just be able to stay dry whenever we’re out then? I thought he’d need to learn that aspect as well or once they know when they need to wee they just ask to go or take themselves regardless of being in a different environment?

 

[Definitelyme]

I’m potty training my nearly 2.5 year old for just over a month. He’s amazing when he’s not wearing anything on his bottom half, he’ll take himself off to the potty when he needs it. He’s doing quite well in trousers at home, he’ll have the odd accident but they’re really infrequent. However, the moment we go out or he goes to nursery he has more wet accidents than successes (he very rarely if ever poos his pants) even when we remind him of the potty or take him to sit down and try. Sometimes he’ll wet himself straight after we’ve taken him to the toilet. I always make him stop and change his trousers and pants before he’s allowed to carry on playing, we give him loads of praise when he does go on the potty, he has a special sticker chart that he colours in for each time he goes to the toilet. Is there anything I could be doing to help him when we’re out and about?
I’m at a bit of a loss and am starting to feel like I’m doing something wrong because I don’t think we’ve had any success in the potty when we’re out

I think he sounds like he’s doing well enough it’s so common for kids to get distracted when they are busy and out and about, and as frustrating as it can be it does end eventually.
What we do is get them to do a “try wee wee” before we leave, when we arrive before we start our activity (park or whatever), halfway through, and again before we get back in the car. We just say you have to try a wee, if nothing comes that’s ok. With a little boy I let them pee against a tree, or if you’re somewhere that wouldn’t work and don’t want to carry a potty then a plastic kids cup works great (we used to take one out when my son had his leg in plaster as we couldn’t always get him to a toilet). We use the toilet in the house, but potties are very useful to keep in the car for days out.
You’re right, they need to learn in all environments and it takes time. It will be a while yet before he’ll just take himself off, especially when out and about as it’s just a barrier to them having fun and they ignore the signals.
Personally I would ditch the sticker charts etc. I am not a big believer in them as once they disappear what is the incentive to wee in the toilet?

 

[BettyCrockerr]

Should he just be able to stay dry whenever we’re out then? I thought he’d need to learn that aspect as well or once they know when they need to wee they just ask to go or take themselves regardless of being in a different environment?

Once he’s toilet trained - as in, he independently feels when he needs to use the toilet and can control his bladder and bowels to hold on until he gets to a toilet- then he should be ok out of the house. You will probably have to start with short journeys and take him into the toilet as soon as you arrive somewhere and again before you leave, but he should be ok going outside the house. He may need a few trips to new places to get the hang of feeling comfortable to go in other toilets other than home - I made the point of going to the toilet in places like Tesco or public toilets at the beach etc and using them with him so that it becomes a normal thing to do - to use any toilet if you need to, not wait and try to hold on until you get home again.

 

[saltandvinegarcrisps]

Should he just be able to stay dry whenever we’re out then? I thought he’d need to learn that aspect as well or once they know when they need to wee they just ask to go or take themselves regardless of being in a different environment?

Yes my son just asked to go wherever we were straight away, soft play, out for lunch, at the park, at nursery, grandparents houses etc. He just learned the signs and asked. He didn't want to have wet clothes but I get he was a fair bit older by the time he wanted to try so made sense he just got it and it was so easy and stress free.

I work full time so he's at nursery 4 days a week with one day at my mums so it wasn't that easy for me to get 121 time to focus on training, We did it over Christmas break and if he hadn't of gotten it I would have asked nursery for support in getting him out of nappies.

He will use a big toilet when we are out but prefers to use his potty and small toilet shaped potty at home as he can do it all himself. He uses a small toilet at his nursery etc so I'm not worried about him progressing on to that once he's ready. Whatever works for you and your child really, but if it's not working then pause it for sure.

 

[Definitelyme]

@bottombanana the book Oh Crap Potty Training is a great read there is a lot I skip over, but it has good info to help you feel more confident, and addresses issues exactly like yours, I would definitely recommend it.

 

[WhatABore]

I’m potty training my nearly 2.5 year old for just over a month. He’s amazing when he’s not wearing anything on his bottom half, he’ll take himself off to the potty when he needs it. He’s doing quite well in trousers at home, he’ll have the odd accident but they’re really infrequent. However, the moment we go out or he goes to nursery he has more wet accidents than successes (he very rarely if ever poos his pants) even when we remind him of the potty or take him to sit down and try. Sometimes he’ll wet himself straight after we’ve taken him to the toilet. I always make him stop and change his trousers and pants before he’s allowed to carry on playing, we give him loads of praise when he does go on the potty, he has a special sticker chart that he colours in for each time he goes to the toilet. Is there anything I could be doing to help him when we’re out and about?
I’m at a bit of a loss and am starting to feel like I’m doing something wrong because I don’t think we’ve had any success in the potty when we’re out

Can you give him a book or something to look at when you ask him to try to go. So he's sitting for longer and not focusing on it. Normally they'll automatically go.
My 4 year old has only recently stopped having accidents. They're only small but it's like she doesn't realise she needs to go. And she's been potty trained for 2 years.
It's also only the past week that she's been dry during the night.

We also used to put nappies on her when we went out until about 6 months after she was trained at home because she'd have accidents, we'd still take her to go when out though.

Maybe she wasn't ready

 

[miamae]

Hello all please can I get some advice? I've got myself in a bit of a state so I'm looking fo some kind of reassurance - if any. My little boy turned 2 in November and he is super sociable and outgoing, and such a cheeky little guy. He goes to nursery 2 times a week and I picked him up today and his nursery worker said "nothing to worry about, but I just wanted to let you know that he is struggling with transition with activities." She basically said that for example he will be playing lovely with other children on the floor and then they will say to him right, we're going to make cakes now and apparently he gets really upset and needs reassurance from them?
I have never really noticed this at home before, he has his usual 'tantrums' but all children are like that. I'm starting to blame myself now and wondering if it's my fault?! Also not sure what she was trying to get at and now I'm panicking that they think something is wrong with him. I think I am probably just making something out of nothing, but adding that into being a hormonal pregnant mess it's really not helping. If anyone has experienced this or has any knowledge I would really appreciate any advice. Thank you x

 

[BettyCrockerr]

Hello all please can I get some advice? I've got myself in a bit of a state so I'm looking fo some kind of reassurance - if any. My little boy turned 2 in November and he is super sociable and outgoing, and such a cheeky little guy. He goes to nursery 2 times a week and I picked him up today and his nursery worker said "nothing to worry about, but I just wanted to let you know that he is struggling with transition with activities." She basically said that for example he will be playing lovely with other children on the floor and then they will say to him right, we're going to make cakes now and apparently he gets really upset and needs reassurance from them?
I have never really noticed this at home before, he has his usual 'tantrums' but all children are like that. I'm starting to blame myself now and wondering if it's my fault?! Also not sure what she was trying to get at and now I'm panicking that they think something is wrong with him. I think I am probably just making something out of nothing, but adding that into being a hormonal pregnant mess it's really not helping. If anyone has experienced this or has any knowledge I would really appreciate any advice. Thank you x

So they are saying that he gets upset when they change from one activity to another? Any other context to this - is this a new thing? How long has he been going to nursery?

i think you should ask them exactly what they feel is wrong - they have made a point of tell you this and seem to have just left you to worry about it. He’s only just 2, he’s very young so I honestly don’t think it’s really anything to worry about but I’d make a point of asking the nursery to provide some more context.

 

[miamae]

Yes it was all really bizzare. They said they've noticed it the past couple of weeks but they've only said something today, but still said "nothing to worry about!". He has been going to nursery since he was 9 months told, he was 5 days a week but since last month he has dropped down to 2 as I have gone part time at work.

Thank you for your advice I will give them an email I think and ask them to elaborate further - I completely agree. Thank you

 

[Definitelyme]

Hello all please can I get some advice? I've got myself in a bit of a state so I'm looking fo some kind of reassurance - if any. My little boy turned 2 in November and he is super sociable and outgoing, and such a cheeky little guy. He goes to nursery 2 times a week and I picked him up today and his nursery worker said "nothing to worry about, but I just wanted to let you know that he is struggling with transition with activities." She basically said that for example he will be playing lovely with other children on the floor and then they will say to him right, we're going to make cakes now and apparently he gets really upset and needs reassurance from them?
I have never really noticed this at home before, he has his usual 'tantrums' but all children are like that. I'm starting to blame myself now and wondering if it's my fault?! Also not sure what she was trying to get at and now I'm panicking that they think something is wrong with him. I think I am probably just making something out of nothing, but adding that into being a hormonal pregnant mess it's really not helping. If anyone has experienced this or has any knowledge I would really appreciate any advice. Thank you x

I would be pretty upset too if I were doing something I enjoyed, and someone came and told me that I had to stop and do something just because they decided it was time. His upset is most likely his way of conveying he was quite happy where he was, and he doesn’t understand why he’s being told he has to stop playing now and he needs their reassurance to help sort those feelings. Why are they making him? Why are they not observing his enjoyment of what he’s doing and either leaving him to finish (his natural curiosity will probably bring him over to the new activity) or at least ASKING him "do you want to bake now?" rather than telling him. I would ask if they are giving time warnings to the kids eg "in five minutes we need to tidy this up to start xyz… in two minutes… in one minute."
It is unreasonable of them to expect a child to just down tools because they say so, and be happy with it.
As far as I can see from what you said, he’s fine, but the adults need work

 

[WhatABore]

Hello all please can I get some advice? I've got myself in a bit of a state so I'm looking fo some kind of reassurance - if any. My little boy turned 2 in November and he is super sociable and outgoing, and such a cheeky little guy. He goes to nursery 2 times a week and I picked him up today and his nursery worker said "nothing to worry about, but I just wanted to let you know that he is struggling with transition with activities." She basically said that for example he will be playing lovely with other children on the floor and then they will say to him right, we're going to make cakes now and apparently he gets really upset and needs reassurance from them?
I have never really noticed this at home before, he has his usual 'tantrums' but all children are like that. I'm starting to blame myself now and wondering if it's my fault?! Also not sure what she was trying to get at and now I'm panicking that they think something is wrong with him. I think I am probably just making something out of nothing, but adding that into being a hormonal pregnant mess it's really not helping. If anyone has experienced this or has any knowledge I would really appreciate any advice. Thank you x

How long has he been going to nursery?
If he's been going a while, and they're only mentioning now, they could be just making a note that it's a sudden change

Just seen your other comment that he's been going for a while.

I wish they'd explain to parents what they're implying.

Usually they'll say it to just make you aware of a change. But usually along with it, they'll ask if anything has changed at home ect

 

[miamae]

This is exactly what my partner said! It's like last week I took him to soft play, after 2 hours we left and he was super sad about it but aren't most children? My 7 year old still gets upset when it's time to leave the park! Thank you for your reply, it's nice to see I'm not alone in thinking this x

How long has he been going to nursery?
If he's been going a while, and they're only mentioning now, they could be just making a note that it's a sudden change

Just seen your other comment that he's been going for a while.

I wish they'd explain to parents what they're implying.

Usually they'll say it to just make you aware of a change. But usually along with it, they'll ask if anything has changed at home ect

He's been with this particular nursery for 3 months, but he's been at the childminders/nursery since 9 months x

How long has he been going to nursery?
If he's been going a while, and they're only mentioning now, they could be just making a note that it's a sudden change

Just seen your other comment that he's been going for a while.

I wish they'd explain to parents what they're implying.

Usually they'll say it to just make you aware of a change. But usually along with it, they'll ask if anything has changed at home ect

Yeah exactly, they didn't ask any of that they just said is he like it at home I was just like not really? I'm a typical mum and let him walk all over me but apart from that I don't see the issue I am such a panicker and I just worry that I've failed him in some way!

 

[Sailorontheseasea]

Hello all please can I get some advice? I've got myself in a bit of a state so I'm looking fo some kind of reassurance - if any. My little boy turned 2 in November and he is super sociable and outgoing, and such a cheeky little guy. He goes to nursery 2 times a week and I picked him up today and his nursery worker said "nothing to worry about, but I just wanted to let you know that he is struggling with transition with activities." She basically said that for example he will be playing lovely with other children on the floor and then they will say to him right, we're going to make cakes now and apparently he gets really upset and needs reassurance from them?
I have never really noticed this at home before, he has his usual 'tantrums' but all children are like that. I'm starting to blame myself now and wondering if it's my fault?! Also not sure what she was trying to get at and now I'm panicking that they think something is wrong with him. I think I am probably just making something out of nothing, but adding that into being a hormonal pregnant mess it's really not helping. If anyone has experienced this or has any knowledge I would really appreciate any advice. Thank you x

I’m quite shocked they’ve pointed this out, firstly he’s only 2! If he was 4 and still doing this between activities, then maybe a little cause for concern - bit even so, don’t all kids get upset when they’re enjoying something? Imagine being that little and asked to change activities mid flow or when you were really into them - my 2yo wouldn’t exactly be agreeable and I know this isn’t my fault. Secondly, everyone knows 2 year olds aren’t exactly easily swayed most of the time just purely due to power play. Don’t worry too much, I’m not sure why they’d feel the need to point this out xx