Toddler advice thread #4

[watermelon sugar]

I know it’s hard not to though. Especially when there is 2 year olds who’ve managed it at nursery. But I think he’ll be ok I’ve got the may half term off as well so can try then if we’re still in them. I’ll be glad when I don’t have to buy them tho anymore. He’s in pampers cos I can’t get any other size 8s and I want to cry each week at the price

Tesco do size 8s!!! We are in size 7s either use Aldi or tesco

 

[strawberrysunshine_x]

I often wake up in the night. I’m a terrible sleeper sometimes.
But I defo wake up when my LO coughs or something like that.
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I often wake up in the night. I’m a terrible sleeper sometimes.
But I defo wake up when my LO coughs or something like that.

 

[Definitelyme]

Hmm. Well I’ve put the eldest today as she’s been acting as my translator this evening which I always find very cute and especially helpful. She also sleeps better than the younger one. But ask me tomorrow and I’ll probably be changing

That is so cute and so smart. Bilingual kids are incredible, blows my mind.

 

[al255]

Oh, sorry if it’s confusing. I thought she was not long out of pull-ups. Maybe I’m getting confused with someone else
My 3yo also wets up him and got the pillow the other day too, which was annoying. He also woke up and laid in it for 10 minutes before I went in to get him ready for school

nooo she’s only been out of pull ups for a few weeks but if we was at home I’d just deal with it but I don’t want to risk her ruining anymore pillows here.

She’s been dry a lot longer than she’s been potty trained and hasn’t really needed a pull up for bed due to them being bone dry every morning I just kept using one out of habit I guess. Her dad still used one too.

 

[Jellybean093]

I am so fed up of my Daughters Dad. I just need a rant!!!!!

He doesn’t drive and expects everyone to be available to take him & our daughter places when it’s nobody else’s responsibility apart from ours.

She’s got a party this Saturday with one of her good nursery friends and all nursery kids are going.

We got the invite weeks ago and he knew he was taking her cos I’m out in another town and have stuff planned / pre booked (and this was booked before she got the invite).

The party is in another town but it’s easily accessible by a bus from his house to town to the train, and she’s free on bus & train. The place is 2 min walk from train station and she will enjoy it. She loves going on any form of transport.

Anyway. I told him I’ve spoke to his mum and she can’t take them due to needing to be somewhere else with his nan due to organising funeral arrangements. So I told her dad get the bus and the train and I’ll bring her pram so she can be strapped in and you’ve no worries about her running off etc he said “I’m skint I’ve only got £15 to my name” WTF man. He then said it’s a faff.

???? I took her to the local zoo which was an hour + round trip on bus & train when she was younger and I didn’t drive! It’s literally a 15-20 min journey into town and then 8 mins on the train and a 2-3 min walk.

He lives with his nan and literally had his rent, phone and CSA to pay for and I said it’s beyond a joke. I said to him I’ll buy his £3.40 train ticket and he can surely pay for the bus himself.

I’m so pissed off and more pissed off that he is skint yet went out for Cheltenham last weekend and didn’t think to save any money to be able to do something with her this weekend, the only day he has her it’s gunna be pissing it down and she knows this party is happening cos she’s been going on about it. If she doesn’t go to this party she won’t be doing anything at all Saturday or Sunday and it’s just really annoyed me. I just feel sorry for her to miss out cos of him. His mum is gunna pay for his bus fare and I’m gunna buy his train ticket so he can’t spend my £3.40 on anything else. It winds me up so so much that he doesn’t seem to care to save money and his outgoings are fuck all.

Just need to rant. I know the party isn’t the end of the world if she doesn’t go but he knew he had to take her to it and she’s been looking forward to it. My dads busy so he can’t take them (even so why should he?!! ) just urgh I don’t know anyone of the other mums well enough to randomly message to ask if she can have a lift there and back but it’s just a piss take even so.

Ah, I’ve been there when my daughter was about the same age. He lost his license for 2 years because he crashed while drunk driving. I was the taxi until I got fed up. I’d always be the one buying presents, even though I wasn’t taking her, and she has occasionally missed out. He’s such a walk over though. He rang this morning because she ‘wasn’t well’ and said she could get the bus home when she ready because he had to get to work. He couldn’t even phone the school to tell them, that was something I had to do, even though I have 3 other kids to get out the house and parents morning and work 🫠 anyway, she went to school and I haven’t heard anything from her. Sorry for me-railing

TLDR some dads are shit cunts

 

[al255]

If it means making it cheaper for you though, and actually getting more free hours, it may be worth it.
That school will still be in your catchment area so she'd still get in

I know but the nursery is amazing and she’s formed some good friendships, I know I’m moaning and esentially it’s saving me £200 a month. My dad said when we were young they got one morning free a week

 

[al255]

When adult teeth come through is it as painful for them?!

 

[Hushpuppy]

A little is better than nothing! I really should be better at giving my lot vitamins

Me too. I need to buy some new ones actually

 

[Kit123]

Has anyone been to Haven? Thinking of taking my daughter this year, single parent now so can't afford (and too nervous ) to take her abroad this year! Lady year we went to Tenerife as a family.
She will be pretty much three by the time we go, just wondering what's included etc

 

[al255]

Thanks for your reply! What's the stay and play pass then? I thought swimming and entertainment was included on the website? I'm looking at one that is about £100. What are the extra activities you have to pay for?
I'm NHS staff so do you get a discount on booking?
I'm actually looking at golden sands because it's not THAT far from me. What's it like?

We went in March 2022 for a weekend and it was warm-ish….

They’ve got that Sanctuary and it was right next to the park so it was handy to go there once we arrived and wait for our caravan to be ready! The beach is lovely too. They’ve got a good playground and the arcade and shops are just what you’d expect.

The stay and play is “haven” on the booking page, you get entertainment, swimming and you can book the activities on the app.

The haven hideaway I think it’s listed as is cheaper as there’s no play pass so you wouldn’t have access to entertainment or swimming but you can access the arcade and shops on site. If you go onto your blue light card or nhs discounts you’ll be able to get a code xx

 

[WhatABore]

my daughter is 1.5 years old and still can't fall asleep on her own, will someone please say i'm not alone in this

None of my kids ever have
Or not for naps at least.
The older 2 we could leave the room and they'd go to sleep at night as long as they were drowsy but this time around, we can't leave or even put her in the cot if she's not in a deep sleep

 

[al255]

it sounds like the routine isn’t working right now and something needs to change. Could you try two books in one location, then the third book in bed?
Is she overtired by this point?

I was thinking 2 books in my bed as that’s where she is before bed then one final book in her bed and starting book time earlier. It’s always “one more book” and the screaming starts
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Take away the iPad at 6. Leave her in bed with a nightlight and a book for her to read.
She’s probably just pushing your buttons, seeing how far she can get

iPad away at 6 doesn’t fit in at all, bathtime isn’t usually until 6:30pm as atm she doesn’t want a long bath, so she’s out by 6:45pm. Dressed at 7pm and she has 15 mins of ipad, taking the iPad away is never a problem it’s the books she’s kicking off over! Just fed up of the screaming over books

 

[al255]

They make the 30 hours so complicated and the whole UC payment paid in arrears, which I believe they are changing?
Can you speak to the nursery and ask if you can come up with a payment plan? I know people have done this before. Or can you get an advance from UC?

The arrears UC thing is only for those who need childcare costs from the first month to help them get back into work x

 

[al255]

My husbands grandma has died, daughter is 3, should I tell her tomorrow? First death that she’ll sort of understand I guess. She wasn’t particularly close, grandma was 102 and in a care home so not someone we saw often and she last saw her in January. Do I sit down and tell her tomorrow or deal with it as it arises? E.g. if she sees daddy upset then explain ‘daddy is sad because great grandma has died’.

I don’t think you should mention it at all.

When my daughters Dads Aunty died the other week, my 3 y o saw him talk about it when he came round and she was abit confused and I just said daddys had some bad news and left it at that. She had never met his Aunty either.

 

[strawberrysunshine_x]

this was my daughters when she got chickenpox, this was day 2… her vaginal area was horrible it was full of spots and I felt horrendous for her but they were the main 2 places xx

Oh it looks nothing like that. It’s literally just on his neck area and cheeks it’s really odd. I was meant to be off work tomorrow but had to change it to Friday cos he has an inset day fingers crossed it’s just a heat rash. He doesn’t have anything on his legs or body anywhere else

 

[strawberrysunshine_x]

Fingers crossed for you. I’m currently in my bed with my three year old telling me I don’t love her because I made her brush her teeth

Hahaha they’re so funny aren’t they.
do I get in with him later on or risk it. I’m working tomorrow and really don’t want to be woken up in the middle of the night

 

[PillowsofFluff]

On another subject, can I get people's opinions on whether I am being a dick or not.

My sister in law turns 18 in June (there's a big gap between her and my other half). Big birthday, I get it. They've decided to hire their favourite curry house as a venue for a party, on the actual night of her birthday, which is a Thursday. Not ideal for people who have work the next day, ie my partner, who as a teacher can't just book the day off, but never mind.
They are keen for us to take 3yo miniP but I have flat out said no as it doesn't start til 7pm (her usual bedtime) and although I could be open to keeping her up a little later, I think it would be shit to take a tired threenager to a loud, noisy birthday party and I would be having a shit time trying to entertain her. Or she would just fall asleep - also rubbish.
So they then said, well can your mum have her. Bearing in mind my mum lives an hour away and also works on Fridays, I can't see how that would work. She leaves at 7am for work and doesn't drive, so I'd have to pick 3yo up at like 6am on Friday morning to bring her back home with me.
Now they are suggesting they get one of my mother in laws cousin's children, who miniP has never in her life met and I have only met once, to stay at our house to look after her. So we would still put her down to bed, then leave for the party and they would just sit in the house and make sure she's ok and doesn't wake. Am I being a dick to hate this idea?
I know it's a big birthday and she wants us there but I would much rather we just all went for lunch in the daytime or something and we treated her separately. But, if we don't go, we'll never hear the end of it, and it will be used as a stick to beat us with forever more

 

[strawberrysunshine_x]

Golden sands is nice. My sister lives in Mablethorpe so we've stayed there a few times. Stayed there last March.

If you pick Haven hideaway, you don't get the entertainment, pool ect
It never used to be a thing until Covid hit and they created Haven hideaway when they couldn't open the pools ect. And then they've just carried on with it as an option.

If you use your Blue Light app, it'll give you £20 off
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I've never put pants on top of pull ups?
Or do you mean having to pull them down to change them?
If so, you just rip the sides as they're easy to tear

Nooo haha I mean to get a fresh one on?? You need to take their pants off to get the new one on

 

[al255]

6 months is a bit extreme? If mine woke up with less than a weeks worth of dry nappies, then I’d remove the nappies. It’s an expensive I won’t be paying when dry. I would definitely suggest the leak proof mats. Putting her back in a pull up will confuse her

I use Lidl pull ups and always have done so they’re cheap (£3.25 odd a pack for 32 i think).

I had loads to use from potty training so whilst she was getting the hang of it during the day I still used one at night. It was only until my friend said she’d never used them and I realised how long she’s been wearing on at night for with no reason to is when I didn’t bother

I don’t think it’ll confuse her cos her dad was still using pull ups at night until last weekend but she’s fully aware she uses the toilet, it’s just for the sake of the holiday. The room abroad is 2 double beds and I’m not buying a waterproof sheet just for the holiday.

Can’t wait to get abroad and have some sunshine, where is summer

 

[al255]

Alphabites are a winner for my son he likes saying what he’s gonna eat

oh my wordddddd I’m gunna get some! I just need Iceland food to bulk her meals up lol