TiffanyThinks #5

[mayday mayday]

I literally cannot watch this anymore. I am a health professional and went thru cancer with my 21 yr old daughter.

Her portrayal of her medical team is infuriating, there is 0 chance she has not been told exactly what the scans say, why they were unable to take a biopsy and what the best plan is moving forward. I feel like she is slandering the RM at this point.

Exactly !!! Where is her medical oncologist? The med onc would be regularly monitoring her blood counts, liver enzymes, CEA (tumor marker), and current symptoms !! Why isn't Tiff mentioning any follow up visits with the med onc team? Is she refusing to make a med onc appt? ARRRGGGHHH!!!

And ..... I'm guessing she never had the lab work that was going to determine if the chemo/RT had put her into early menopause. Or was it scheduled on the same day as the appt with the mental health therapist? Oh ... wait ... never mind.

 

[suzeq]

Exactly !!! Where is her medical oncologist? The med onc would be regularly monitoring her blood counts, liver enzymes, CEA (tumor marker), and current symptoms !! Why isn't Tiff mentioning any follow up visits with the med onc team? Is she refusing to make a med onc appt? ARRRGGGHHH!!!

And why isn't she turning FIRST to her oncologist for answers? The oncologist is exactly the person who should be answering all of her questions and updating her. IMO, it is her onc she should be demanding answers from and who should be taking the time to explain and reassure her.

 

[mayday mayday]

And why isn't she turning FIRST to her oncologist for answers? The oncologist is exactly the person who should be answering all of her questions and updating her. IMO, it is her onc she should be demanding answers from and who should be taking the time to explain and reassure her.

She was so p-d off at that last med onc visit that I betcha she's refusing to follow up with the med onc team.

 

[BCrowl]

POLL time! I am curious about my living TL family.

When you watch cancer journey vlogs, how much content do you fast forward?
None
Music montages only
10-25%
Easily half
Almost everything but the cancer updates.

I will tell you I'm in it for the updates. Montage, happy mail, memory making excursions - generally do NOT make my cut! I know, this probably makes me sound like a vampire...

I watch the whole video, trying so hard to make sense of all this. Actually I watch them twice lol The first time I watch it, it’s so much to take in, and so much confusion, that I’m in a state of shock by the time it’s over! lol Later I go back and watch again, trying to put the pieces of the puzzle together. It is very frustrating! I started following Tiffany in the summer. One of her videos came up in my feed. I clicked on it and got hooked. I watched all of her cancer vlog videos, and some of the ones before the cancer. I have been so invested in her journey. But ever since the “No Surgery” video, I have been nothing but frustrated, as we all are. I’m so glad I found this thread!

 

[virgocat]

Wow, her latest video is a complete mess. I find it hard to believe doctors would come and tell her important updates while she's still clearly high as a kite, even so, wouldn't Amma be there to relay the information?? They both come across as so simple. Her fixation on that surgeon is concerning, she thinks that he is the magic bullet for her cancer, when that clearly isn't the case. The doctor who came in and she said she thought she had 'offended' them, I think she threw a tantrum and refused to speak to anyone other than her surgeon and that's why she ended up seeing him. I think the overly sickly sweet personality she puts on is the complete opposite of how she is in real life, the mask sometimes slips for a second in her videos. It was her decision to wait and now she is upset they couldn't do a biopsy, they would have been very clear exactly why they couldn't do it, no doctor would say 'oh sorry something was blocking it' and leave it at that, they would give her a detailed explanation. It's almost pointless to speculate now because all my personal speculations have dire outcomes.

I hope all the prayers from her deranged fans help her because medically I'm growing to believe she's now beyond anything but palliative care.

Also very odd that there was a phonecall from her aunt and uncle but no mention or call to Matt. You would think a partner would be facetiming you, calling and keeping updated. Matt has seemed very distant in the last few vlogs and I think he's checked out mentally. Maybe he was someone with sense at first but Amma and Tiffany's delusion caused him not to air his opinions.

 

[ladyt7087]

And why isn't she turning FIRST to her oncologist for answers? The oncologist is exactly the person who should be answering all of her questions and updating her. IMO, it is her onc she should be demanding answers from and who should be taking the time to explain and reassure her.

I said this to her in a few comments to todays vlog. Will probably get deleted. She is laser focused on this surgeon and it is freaky. The onc doctor should be her primary contact point!.

She was so p-d off at that last med onc visit that I betcha she's refusing to follow up with the med onc team.

I think the same thing. Anyone who doesnt give her the answers she wants is pushed to the side. Her onc clearly told her the tumor is still there and its status hadnt changed. But now T is saying, perhaps its gone because Amma suggested that? WHAT??? The denial on display is that of a child. And Amma and Matt have been enabling her fantasy world all along.

I just watched a small part of the vid where she and Amma speculate that the tumor is gone! My god, these two are not facing reality. Its mind boggling how out of touch they are. Her onc just recently told her the tumor is still there, for gods sake!
Her surgeon may or may not attempt another biopsy. But honestly, I dont think it matters anymore. The surgery window has probably closed by now but she refuses to face the truth. This is truly the proverbial train wreck in real life!
Her obsession with this surgeon is very unhealthy.

 

[Hollyweirdone]

And why isn't she turning FIRST to her oncologist for answers? The oncologist is exactly the person who should be answering all of her questions and updating her. IMO, it is her onc she should be demanding answers from and who should be taking the time to explain and reassure her.

This is what I was thinking. The surgeon Carrie’s on on what the oncologist diagnose thus she should call him and tell him that she is supposedly in the dark. She chasing this surgeon like a flee is chasing a dog…𖧷𓁹︎

 

[EastofEden_95]

Matt should have been there. I understand partners need time to recharge in situations like this. But he has been away (with and without Tiffany) multiple times throughout her journey. From the vlogs, he seems able to regularly engage in active hobbies that get him out of the house (which is great!). Many couples in similar situations have too many responsibilities and stresses to have so much as a date night. It’s all relative, but he’s not working double shifts, caring for young children, driving her for hours to her appointments, struggling with paying rent in poor housing, etc., which many people have on top of their partner’s cancer journey.

I agree with the everyone’s comments about how maddening this situation has become. However, I am inclined to believe we are witnessing someone who is in a worryingly fragile mental state. Seeing Tiffany alone in hospital, with only her her overwhelmed mother to advocate for her (with a language barrier to navigate!) was upsetting.

She was in pain and drugged to the eyeballs on morphine - despite no biopsy being taken. She had a horrendous time recovering from the last biopsy: so much so, I think it played a significant role in her sudden aversion to surgery. Then the mental health toll on worrying what they could find after 8 weeks…this was never going to be simple. And knowing all this, her partner decides to go on a city break?

I’d fully aware we see only a snippet of their day-to-day reality. But if you are your partner’s main support system, and your profess to love them, why wouldn’t you want to be there, even if just to hold their hand?

I stand by a comment I made in the original watch/wait video that Matt’s flippant “I don’t think it will grow in 6 weeks” really rubbed me the wrong way. Having had loved ones be seriously unwell, and having a male partner who has gone above and beyond to support me with my own struggles, this made me so uncomfortable.

Not saying he’s a bad guy by any means, and hope this isn’t overstepping. But I do think this was weird and I felt really sorry for Tiffany.

 

[skippy1931]

so happy to find these posts about her. I was a fan way back when she lost her dad. I dont' get the appeal for her not being mean but she acts like a immature 12 year old. How does matt find her attractive she acts like a child. The non stop cackling laugh darling darling this is my darling Matt!!! The stage 5 clinger the man cannot walk into the door before she starts that crap. She has to walk him out to the car, if she drives him or her mom drives him to the station she has to watch him walk into the station its odd and he finds that attractive?

 

[ladyt7087]

Wow, her latest video is a complete mess. I find it hard to believe doctors would come and tell her important updates while she's still clearly high as a kite, even so, wouldn't Amma be there to relay the information?? They both come across as so simple. Her fixation on that surgeon is concerning, she thinks that he is the magic bullet for her cancer, when that clearly isn't the case. The doctor who came in and she said she thought she had 'offended' them, I think she threw a tantrum and refused to speak to anyone other than her surgeon and that's why she ended up seeing him. I think the overly sickly sweet personality she puts on is the complete opposite of how she is in real life, the mask sometimes slips for a second in her videos. It was her decision to wait and now she is upset they couldn't do a biopsy, they would have been very clear exactly why they couldn't do it, no doctor would say 'oh sorry something was blocking it' and leave it at that, they would give her a detailed explanation. It's almost pointless to speculate now because all my personal speculations have dire outcomes.

I hope all the prayers from her deranged fans help her because medically I'm growing to believe she's now beyond anything but palliative care.

Also very odd that there was a phonecall from her aunt and uncle but no mention or call to Matt. You would think a partner would be facetiming you, calling and keeping updated. Matt has seemed very distant in the last few vlogs and I think he's checked out mentally. Maybe he was someone with sense at first but Amma and Tiffany's delusion caused him not to air his opinions.

It is very odd that Matt is MIA. If he's involved, she always lets us know. And why film the call from her uncle and aunt? We didnt really hear anything about what was said, so why film a snippet? This latest vlog is the most bizarre one of all. Im beyond trying to figure it out anymore. I feel like Im watching a badly filmed movie.

 

[J3N1800]

This is what I was thinking. The surgeon Carrie’s on on what the oncologist diagnose thus she should call him and tell him that she is supposedly in the dark. She chasing this surgeon like a flee is chasing a dog…𖧷𓁹︎

These comments about her obsession with the surgeon are making me laugh and I agree.
I remember her comment this was the only surgeon willing to do the op - she must think other medical staff are going to say no to surgery and constantly wants his reassurance.

 

[Daisychain4]

It is very odd that Matt is MIA. If he's involved, she always lets us know. And why film the call from her uncle and aunt? We didnt really hear anything about what was said, so why film a snippet? This latest vlog is the most bizarre one of all. Im beyond trying to figure it out anymore. I feel like Im watching a badly filmed movie.

I too have thought about Matt and the possibilities regards his absence.
I wonder if he isn’t actually the sane one in this very weird outfit … I gather he does not like the vlogging so possibly given Tiffany wanted all the drama of her hospital visit being filmed, I’m wondering if he hasn’t said no to any camera. Therefore Aama being the little puppet she is to the feisty daughter went along.

Also, the aunty and uncle could well be the parents of the cousin (Dr) who was telling / advising her what to do via his parents, thus the call.
Just thoughts.

 

[ladyt7087]

My mom passed from advanced rectal cancer so I know how this plays out. She started eating less, was bleeding, lost weight and was in pain before her diagnosis. She underwent palliative surgery and only survived about 3 months after that. I see some of the same symptons in Tiffany. Bleeding, losing weight, in pain. Her continued need for morphine is a huge red flag that she is not cancer free. Once this type of cancer reaches a certain point, there is little than can be done except to treat a patient's pain. I think Tiffany is at this point, but refuses to face it. She clings to this surgeon because he was the only one even willing to try curative surgery. But that was months ago. I doubt that option is even viable now.

 

[RamonaRemembers]

My mom passed from advanced rectal cancer so I know how this plays out. She started eating less, was bleeding, lost weight and was in pain before her diagnosis. She underwent palliative surgery and only survived about 3 months after that. I see some of the same symptons in Tiffany. Bleeding, losing weight, in pain. Her continued need for morphine is a huge red flag that she is not cancer free. Once this type of cancer reaches a certain point, there is little than can be done except to treat a patient's pain. I think Tiffany is at this point, but refuses to face it. She clings to this surgeon because he was the only one even willing to try curative surgery. But that was months ago. I doubt that option is even viable now.

I'm so sorry about your mom. I think you are right about the surgeon. She clings to him because he gave her hope and said he would treat her like his own daughter or sister or something like that.

 

[TickTickTick]

Yes, Ivermectin for covid. Fenbendazole for cancer now. Sigh...



Me too. I missed whatever happene7d too. Seemed to have shaken up the place. Not supposed to talk about it, per the mods...

Wait, this is Tattle, supposedly we can talk about anything! What happened, I want to know, and I want the opinions still of people who have disappeared from here, who had wise and insightful thoughts on the Tiff situation. This a bit reminds me of my old days at church, where the bishop lectured us about sex outside marriage, and then was caught having an affair with the chaplain at a local school. Both were married. We were told not to talk about it! This passes me off. Isn't it hypocritical? Am I bonkers? I don't like it.

 

[ladyt7087]

I'm so sorry about your mom. I think you are right about the surgeon. She clings to him because he gave her hope and said he would treat her like his own daughter or sister or something like that.

Thanks for the kind words. This type of cancer is brutal and painful. My mom ignored her symptoms for too long. We werent even aware of them until she noticeably lost weight and couldnt hide the pain. Were it not for the morphine, I believe Tiffany wouldnt be able to cope either. She is very ill, I think. And it will only get worse.

 

[suzeq]

My mom passed from advanced rectal cancer so I know how this plays out. She started eating less, was bleeding, lost weight and was in pain before her diagnosis. She underwent palliative surgery and only survived about 3 months after that. I see some of the same symptons in Tiffany. Bleeding, losing weight, in pain. Her continued need for morphine is a huge red flag that she is not cancer free. Once this type of cancer reaches a certain point, there is little than can be done except to treat a patient's pain. I think Tiffany is at this point, but refuses to face it. She clings to this surgeon because he was the only one even willing to try curative surgery. But that was months ago. I doubt that option is even viable now.

There are so many people here who have shared their pain and poignant experiences with cancer. I am so sorry that you lost your mother.

IMO, this is an empathic group that is clearly frustrated and confused and just trying to find answers and a place of shared commiseration.

I appreciate those who have opened up about their personal pain or knowledge in an attempt to help the rest of us gain some understanding.

Wait, this is Tattle, supposedly we can talk about anything! What happened, I want to know, and I want the opinions still of people who have disappeared from here, who had wise and insightful thoughts on the Tiff situation. This a bit reminds me of my old days at church, where the bishop lectured us about sex outside marriage, and then was caught having an affair with the chaplain at a local school. Both were married. We were told not to talk about it! This passes me off. Isn't it hypocritical? Am I bonkers? I don't like it.

All, please move on from the drama over thread titles as it'll only disrupt and get into arguments again. Best to post on topic. If you ever have an issue do report for mods to resolve or post in site help.

You are only allowed one account on tattle, creating multiple accounts to talk to yourself will be picked up by the system.

Now you know as much as I do.

 

[BCrowl]

My mom passed from advanced rectal cancer so I know how this plays out. She started eating less, was bleeding, lost weight and was in pain before her diagnosis. She underwent palliative surgery and only survived about 3 months after that. I see some of the same symptons in Tiffany. Bleeding, losing weight, in pain. Her continued need for morphine is a huge red flag that she is not cancer free. Once this type of cancer reaches a certain point, there is little than can be done except to treat a patient's pain. I think Tiffany is at this point, but refuses to face it. She clings to this surgeon because he was the only one even willing to try curative surgery. But that was months ago. I doubt that option is even viable now.

I am so sorry to hear about your Mom. I lost my Dad three years ago to advanced glioblastoma brain cancer. These cancers are awful.
I remember in the “No Surgery” video, Tiffany and Matt really tried to convey the message that the surgeon was urging her to watch and wait, as if he didn’t think it was a good idea to do the surgery. I wish we could hear what he and the other doctors are really saying. It’s hard to make sense of Tiffany’s interpretations.

 

[suzeq]

My condolences on your loss, BCrowl. 🫂

I.hate.cancer.

 

[BCrowl]

I saw that Tiffany answered this:

My condolences on your loss, BCrowl. 🫂

I hate cancer.

Thank you so much! I hate it too!!