TiffanyThinks #5

[Laura8868]

My mom passed from advanced rectal cancer so I know how this plays out. She started eating less, was bleeding, lost weight and was in pain before her diagnosis. She underwent palliative surgery and only survived about 3 months after that. I see some of the same symptons in Tiffany. Bleeding, losing weight, in pain. Her continued need for morphine is a huge red flag that she is not cancer free. Once this type of cancer reaches a certain point, there is little than can be done except to treat a patient's pain. I think Tiffany is at this point, but refuses to face it. She clings to this surgeon because he was the only one even willing to try curative surgery. But that was months ago. I doubt that option is even viable now.

Did she managed actually talk to this surgeon on the end of the video?
I couldn't watch it all- it was too disturbing
It's super weird he left her without any supervision first for 6 weeks, then it extends to 8/9 weeks
That's a lifetime in advanced cancer world.
I'm sure he is good and professional so I don't think is his ignorance.
What's the reason then?

 

[Petro48]

Just thought of something else....why is she even in the hospital? Thought she was only admitted this time because she had such a bad time after the last biopsy. If no biopsy was done, why didn't they just send her home? Ugh... nothing makes sense.

 

[suzeq]

I saw that Tiffany answered this:

Not even responding to the ACTUAL comment, but 'speaking' AROUND it! No wonder we're pulling our hair out!

 

[ladyt7087]

I am so sorry to hear about your Mom. I lost my Dad three years ago to advanced glioblastoma brain cancer. These cancers are awful.
I remember in the “No Surgery” video, Tiffany and Matt really tried to convey the message that the surgeon was urging her to watch and wait, as if he didn’t think it was a good idea to do the surgery. I wish we could hear what he and the other doctors are really saying. It’s hard to make sense of Tiffany’s interpretations.

So sorry for you too. Cancer is a beast.

 

[suzeq]

It's super weird he left her without any supervision first for 6 weeks, then it extends to 8/9 weeks
That's a lifetime in advanced cancer world.
I'm sure he is good and professional so I don't think is his ignorance.
What's the reason then?

I only know from reading some of the Watch & Wait LARC research that this is standard protocol, to redo all tests after 6 weeks. I don't know if that's why in Tiffany's case since we have not heard what the surgeon said her results were from the last tests beyond vague references (which remains the big mystery: if she qualified for WW and if yes, why). I can only offer that this is standard for WW. She did have bloodwork done early on in WW, but I don't think I've read any results. So, she might have been "monitored" in some fashion.

 

[ladyt7087]

Just thought of something else....why is she even in the hospital? Thought she was only admitted this time because she had such a bad time after the last biopsy. If no biopsy was done, why didn't they just send her home? Ugh... nothing makes sense.

Very good point. I think shes sicker than she lets on. She did have anesthesia so theyd keep her a bit until she was fully awake. But the pain shes had doesnt make sense since there was no bioosy. I think her pain is related to the progression of her cancer.

 

[BCrowl]

Did she managed actually talk to this surgeon on the end of the video?
I couldn't watch it all- it was too disturbing
It's super weird he left her without any supervision first for 6 weeks, then it extends to 8/9 weeks
That's a lifetime in advanced cancer world.
I'm sure he is good and professional so I don't think is his ignorance.
What's the reason then?

Yes, she got to speak to him. She didn’t show it, though. She was crying because the doctor who did the biopsy wanted to talk to her, but she only wanted to talk to her surgeon. Then she seemed upset because she thought she had offended that doctor. The next clip we see, Tiffany and Amma are all smiles because they just spoke to the surgeon, and now they are happy and reassured. He is going to have a look at the scans, and if there is any change, he will do another biopsy. But, they don’t have the results yet. Tiffany said she gave him a big cuddle lol and that she and Amma had been crying to him, but now they are reassured. Tiffany said she is willing to pay him privately to do a biopsy even if there is no change in the scans, but he doesn’t want her to go private. She said she trusts him so much because “only he can do what he does.” She will even sell her house to pay for the biopsy!

So sorry for you too. Cancer is a beast.

Thank you so much, yes it is!!

 

[Blue skies]

Matt should have been there. I understand partners need time to recharge in situations like this. But he has been away (with and without Tiffany) multiple times throughout her journey. From the vlogs, he seems able to regularly engage in active hobbies that get him out of the house (which is great!). Many couples in similar situations have too many responsibilities and stresses to have so much as a date night. It’s all relative, but he’s not working double shifts, caring for young children, driving her for hours to her appointments, struggling with paying rent in poor housing, etc., which many people have on top of their partner’s cancer journey.

I agree with the everyone’s comments about how maddening this situation has become. However, I am inclined to believe we are witnessing someone who is in a worryingly fragile mental state. Seeing Tiffany alone in hospital, with only her her overwhelmed mother to advocate for her (with a language barrier to navigate!) was upsetting.

She was in pain and drugged to the eyeballs on morphine - despite no biopsy being taken. She had a horrendous time recovering from the last biopsy: so much so, I think it played a significant role in her sudden aversion to surgery. Then the mental health toll on worrying what they could find after 8 weeks…this was never going to be simple. And knowing all this, her partner decides to go on a city break?

I’d fully aware we see only a snippet of their day-to-day reality. But if you are your partner’s main support system, and your profess to love them, why wouldn’t you want to be there, even if just to hold their hand?

I stand by a comment I made in the original watch/wait video that Matt’s flippant “I don’t think it will grow in 6 weeks” really rubbed me the wrong way. Having had loved ones be seriously unwell, and having a male partner who has gone above and beyond to support me with my own struggles, this made me so uncomfortable.

Not saying he’s a bad guy by any means, and hope this isn’t overstepping. But I do think this was weird and I felt really sorry for Tiffany.

And where’s her sister or doctor cousin? She stayed overnight in the hospital and we didn’t see them visiting her? Her bro in law could have certainly cared for the kids and allowed her sister to visit. I think they either aren’t very caring towards her or are just fed-up with her and her YT obsession.

 

[suzeq]

This might be random, but...is LARC almost always caused by HPV, or just mostly anal cancer? Or would Tiffany not have had genetic testing if they already knew hers was caused by HPV?

 

[Laura8868]

Yes, she got to speak to him. She didn’t show it, though. She was crying because the doctor who did the biopsy wanted to talk to her, but she only wanted to talk to her surgeon. Then she seemed upset because she thought she had offended that doctor. The next clip we see, Tiffany and Amma are all smiles because they just spoke to the surgeon, and now they are happy and reassured. He is going to have a look at the scans, and if there is any change, he will do another biopsy. But, they don’t have the results yet. Tiffany said she gave him a big cuddle lol and that she and Amma had been crying to him, but now they are reassured. Tiffany said she is willing to pay him privately to do a biopsy even if there is no change in the scans, but he doesn’t want her to go private. She said she trusts him so much because “only he can do what he does.” She will even sell her house to pay for the biopsy!


Thank you so much, yes it is!!

Thank you for recap- that's so creepy.
They both (her and mum) seems obsessed about this particular surgeon.
Probably he fits her narrative, give her hope
It won't end up well
As a nurse who work in oncology (children's) I can say I never saw a miracle, so unfortunately I don't believe cancer ( especially stage 3 can just dissappear). What's her mum profession? No offence but she looks very naive, how she can even put these idea in T head that cancer dissappear so there is nothing to perform the biopsy?

 

[ginnyw]

The thing that gives away her 'confusion' the most is a very simple one: it's The Royal Marsden. It's not Fred and Bill's Cowboy Hospital in Never-Never Land. It's the ROYAL MARSDEN.

 

[RamonaRemembers]

And where’s her sister or doctor cousin? She stayed overnight in the hospital and we didn’t see them visiting her? Her bro in law could have certainly cared for the kids and allowed her sister to visit. I think they either aren’t very caring towards her or are just fed-up with her and her YT obsession.

It's possible they visited her and she didn't film it bc they don't want to be on the vlog very much. I was surprised to learn on here that she went out to dinner with Matt on the vlog and left out the fact that it was for her BILs bday. When I read that I realized she's leaving things out to protect peoples' privacy.

 

[jackolantern]

The thing that gives away her 'confusion' the most is a very simple one: it's The Royal Marsden. It's not Fred and Bill's Cowboy Hospital in Never-Never Land. It's the ROYAL MARSDEN.

Really makes me angry because most people don’t have the chance of treatment at somewhere so renowned, nevermind a surgeon as qualified who is willing to try and perform surgery like that. Yes I know it’s barbaric but least she has/had the choice. Most others get chemo and basic surgery at best and then left to die. My Dad would have killed for any chance to live as I’m sure most of the loved ones we’ve all lost to this evil disease would have done. And what does she do? Get her hounds to attack the surgeon and his team due to her lies.

 

[suzeq]

The thing that gives away her 'confusion' the most is a very simple one: it's The Royal Marsden. It's not Fred and Bill's Cowboy Hospital in Never-Never Land. It's the ROYAL MARSDEN.

LOL. Well said. Exactly. This isn't their first cancer rodeo. Nor their first time with a cowgirl like Tiffany. They've been around this corral a time or two before.

 

[Elpis]

Trying to piece of some of this together (and it ain't easy) -- she seems like part of her is a "fabulist". Earlier in the thread, someone said what we're seeing now is actually weeks ago.

She may want to sort of make up a fictional story (obviously with a lot of factual stuff but almost like that part is the "bones" of the script she's developing)

So maybe her sister did visit - maybe she was never going on that trip to Ireland - maybe Matt was with her but he's disagreeing with her "script" so she edited all the parts out where he is there and the sister's visiting (and whoever in the family is a doctor) etc. I mean, correct me if I'm wrong, but we didn't see her see Matt off on the train or even leave the house with his suitcase -- or any definitive evidence that he left town, did we?

She's just so so so fake and so much like a little girl playing house - making up the story as she goes along, tweaked to get clicks and sympathy (and money) but much like an editor of a reality show, she's picking and choosing the parts she wants in her "movie"

Well, I'll hush -- but that's what I just feel in my spidey senses when I watch and listen to her -- she's making up a fantasy world -- maybe even living it (convincing herself of falsehoods). And maybe it's her way of coping -- just dissociate from the horror, and start intentionally being delusional.

 

[ellyjelly2]

She could do an update on Instagram. The make a YT vlog for those who don’t have insta, but she won’t. She wants the speculation and the views. Very sad she is choosing that over the truth and her health. People genuinely care about her yet she seems to think nothing of making them worry about her. She’s a 30yr old woman, I think a lot of her viewers forget that and feel they are defending a child. All very odd. Appalling that she is making a soap opera out of something so serious and dragging the Marsden down in the process.

 

[wtfisgoingon2022]

This was excellent! I just saw it a few minutes ago and took a screenshot to share here. I posted it in a reply to someone else before I read this!

I am concerned she is a pathological liar. I remember a while ago something I found odd was that she keeps saying that her Dad died of Covid but someone commented that they were confused as she had said ages ago ago that her Dad died when she was young or that her Dad was never in this country or something? I found it very odd and thought maybe it was a misunderstanding but with all the other things not adding up and that weird comment from a potential ex friend I’m wondering if we have a pathological liar on Our hands? Some people are like that no matter how nice they seem and her niceness seems very fake. I feel really bad saying this and I don’t usually comment on forums like this but I needed to get it out.

 

[Laura8868]

Trying to piece of some of this together (and it ain't easy) -- she seems like part of her is a "fabulist". Earlier in the thread, someone said what we're seeing now is actually weeks ago.

She may want to sort of make up a fictional story (obviously with a lot of factual stuff but almost like that part is the "bones" of the script she's developing)

So maybe her sister did visit - maybe she was never going on that trip to Ireland - maybe Matt was with her but he's disagreeing with her "script" so she edited all the parts out where he is there and the sister's visiting (and whoever in the family is a doctor) etc. I mean, correct me if I'm wrong, but we didn't see her see Matt off on the train or even leave the house with his suitcase -- or any definitive evidence that he left town, did we?

She's just so so so fake and so much like a little girl playing house - making up the story as she goes along, tweaked to get clicks and sympathy (and money) but much like an editor of a reality show, she's picking and choosing the parts she wants in her "movie"

Well, I'll hush -- but that's what I just feel in my spidey senses when I watch and listen to her -- she's making up a fantasy world -- maybe even living it (convincing herself of falsehoods). And maybe it's her way of coping -- just dissociate from the horror, and start intentionally being delusional.

Unfortunately Mat and her mum shares this delusion with her

 

[ginnyw]

She could do an update on Instagram. The make a YT vlog for those who don’t have insta, but she won’t. She wants the speculation and the views. Very sad she is choosing that over the truth and her health. People genuinely care about her yet she seems to think nothing of making them worry about her. She’s a 30yr old woman, I think a lot of her viewers forget that and feel they are defending a child. All very odd. Appalling that she is making a soap opera out of something so serious and dragging the Marsden down in the process.

Agree....she knows full well that YT provides an automatic income for her.

 

[suzeq]

Trying to piece of some of this together (and it ain't easy) -- she seems like part of her is a "fabulist". Earlier in the thread, someone said what we're seeing now is actually weeks ago.

She may want to sort of make up a fictional story (obviously with a lot of factual stuff but almost like that part is the "bones" of the script she's developing)

So maybe her sister did visit - maybe she was never going on that trip to Ireland - maybe Matt was with her but he's disagreeing with her "script" so she edited all the parts out where he is there and the sister's visiting (and whoever in the family is a doctor) etc. I mean, correct me if I'm wrong, but she didn't see Matt off on the train 00 or any definitive evidence that he left town, did we?

She's just so so so fake and so much like a little girl playing house - making up the story as she goes along, tweaked to get clicks and sympathy (and money) but much like an editor of a reality show, she's picking and choosing the parts she wants in her "movie"

Well, I'll hush -- but that's what I just feel in my spidey senses when I watch and listen to her -- she's making up a fantasy world -- maybe even living it (convincing herself of falsehoods). And maybe it's her way of coping -- just dissociate from the horror, and start intentionally being delusional.

I think she definitely thinks she's producing a movie; even her comment in the midst of this brouhaha over this last video and it being so long after the actual procedure, she explains the delay by how much time it takes to edit, and she's only one person...

It's like she is missing the whole point of what's wrong with this picture: she is already beyond this point in time in dealing with the whole hospital mishaps and cancer saga, yet still insists on playing with our heartstrings by releasing the video without even an update in her intro to the video or in the follow up comments. We must "stay tuned" to find out what happened last week! All of the sub comments are moot and irrelevant by now, she already has another week in editing ready to be released or dramatically hinted at on Tuesday's Tea or on Thursday. This is a sitcom to her with each video being a new episode!