TheNurseMum #8

noobie123 · Sep 7, 2021

The thing is with kaytee, she is very good with words, and possibly the worst Narcissist I have EVER come across!! She was literally starving her child to near death and yet people would be absolutely raving about her doing to feeding programme because for a long time she used to make out J was doing amazing (even though clearly not with dramatic weight loss) because he’d lick some frazzles.

my point being, she gets away with anything because she’s a liar and she’s good at it. She knows what she’s doing. She knows what to say to get her own way, however this didn’t work for the continuing carers situation (the people who assessed J) and she hated it! I really believe they are the ones who saw straight through her

Cariad · Sep 7, 2021

ScrambledBegs said:
My thoughts exactly!!! Especially number 2, she must think people are so thick .

Maldives is such a strange place for a poorly child to go, I imagine there’s not a lot of hospitals. If he had an emergency or something could be dangerous for him.. Also probably be boring for him after a while. But again what she wanted to do and where would give her the most “stylish” insta pics

There's only one hospital on Male( the main Island) for the whole of the archipelago ...the Maldives are not designed for ill children and the flight(s) alone would take 11 hrs . However I have no doubt she will still 'honour his memory' and go to the Maldives- hypocrite ....although currently the Maldives are not open for U.K. travellers
but remember this is the mother that took her sick child to the remote African islands of Cape Verde, which also had no hospital....it's always been about her and not J

Goldfish · Sep 7, 2021

Looking back on her Instagram at the time she was pushing for the feeding school it’s so heartbreaking to see how poorly he looks and how quickly he deteriorated

Spyglass · Sep 7, 2021

Those pictures haunt me. There's also another one of him looking up at the camera and his eyes are so sunk into his sockets, his cheekbones are razor sharp and the skin stretched tight over his face.
How hungry he would of been for months and his mother would just pass him a frazzle.
J had oral aversion for those who don't know why he had a gastrostomy.
The reason she doesn't have a huge following of SEN parents or those with children with very complex health needs specifically.... the majority saw through her. You cannot lie, manipulate and pull the wool over people who actually walked the shoes she tried so hard to insist she did.
It's hard for those who did qualify for carers, who do have children with much severe disabilities and see her moaning she hasn't had a night sleep whilst she's got her slap on, ready for her PT session after she's waved her son off on school transport. Seeing her son do so so so much more than their children but having to listen to his mother make him disabled to suit her narrative.
Shes sick.
The hidden engagement she had, which was ended that evening... the trio to Cape Verde... where again he left them. Always chasing rich men to fund her lifestyle and j got dragged around.
The trip to dubai that funnily enough was funded just after a massive fundraiser injection... the trip she made out she was alone. All her followers lapping up the inspirational photos of a woman on her own with a disabled child.
Oh please! Why is taking a child with a disability inspirational?!!?!!! Why is that something amazing ?????? Her followers are also some of the most ableist people and must think disabled children stay at home locked away.
She took him on a holiday. He was very very underweight so wouldn't have weighed a lot carrying ( even though she would make people think carrying him on her hip was such a huge thing ). He was young, she had help at the airport with luggage and had help she tried sweeping under carpet.
Taking a child with complex needs abroad needs a hospital planned. You need to know where the hospital is, make sure your on the mainland, that you can speak the language .... kaytee never gave a shit about what would happen if he became poorly at the unsuitable places she took him. And a part of me often thinks if he did need to go into hospital whilst on one of those holidays she'd of loved the attention that would of brought from media and her army of arse lickers.

mrslh · Sep 7, 2021

She says he was like that before but he was not at all . She needs to be held accountable for the neglect she out that poor boy through instead she’s lapping it up abroad cashin in on his death makes me sick

Cady1954 · Sep 7, 2021

Sendparent said:
This might be one of the times when people might think she felt guilt, but she follows it with saying J was like that before the feeding school and we always blame ourselves for things that aren't in our control.

J was not like that before the feeding school and she was the only one who had control of this situation. GOSH and his team at his local hospital told her not to do this. She had control, the choice was up to her and she paid thousands to do it. He wasn't fit enough to go over to Austria, that should have been a red flag not to do it but she pushed for him to so the online programme where she is in the UK and the doctors are in Austria. That was even more risky. That should have been another red flag.

Before the feeding school she was claiming he vomited up to 50 times a day. (He would have been in hospital if that was the case) After the feeding school ended she justified making him do it by slipping up and saying J vomited on average once a day (not 50 like she claimed to the media and when she was fundraising) she said during the 56 days he did the feeding programme he only vomited 6 times.
That post is still there. She was then upset he was rushed into hospital and the first thing the doctors did was put him on feeds which made him vomit. She was almost blaming the hospital for putting him back on feeds. I've hid his face, mods can remove if they wish, she has never hid his face and has chosen to share him like this but mods are more than welcome to remove. From these pics you can see why the hospital put him straight onto feeds, you can also understand that if he was starving it might explain why he only vomited 6 times in 56 days. As a nurse you would hope that would have been another red flag, not something to justify why it was good to take him off his feeds and to moan about the hospital putting him back on.

She used to say the feeding school cost double what it did until it the true cost was put on here and then she started saying the right price. There was also a meet up in this country for the feeding plan, she was going to it to find out information properly but said it had been cancelled so went out instead but other SEN parents off insta attended it as it wasn't cancelled whatsoever. Not 100% but I think all those that went chose not to risk it.

That photo she is using of J on the slide for her souvenirs people might remember her posting them to her stories at the time. Unless they were following the threads before they wont know what was going on at that point.

People had said she never took him to the park or play area, few days later she takes him. Then we all suspected J wasn't actually with her, she started sharing pics/clips of him that looked pre-recorded, put up pre-recorded ads and tried to make it look like he was with her. His dad dropped her in it by saying he had had J for 10 days. There was no need to hide him going to stay with his daddy, but she didn't like people clocking on to the fact she had 60 hours a week of carers, 35 hours of school, 5 hours estimate for the school transport, her mum had him once a week for a few hours and J's dad had him at weekends often.

Jesus Christ I hadnr seen those photos. What I really cant get my head around is the fact when he was that weight and the hospital put him back on feeds why weren't there red flags? May be there was a safeguarding plan that obviously she wouldn't let on about. But having said that if there had been she would have been the first to moan about.

Cady1954 · Sep 7, 2021

Simbama12 said:
It was disgusting at the time, I remember my mouth just being ajar at what she was saying. I thank my stars I have 2 healthy children but I’d have been even more disgusted with her if my kids were poorly and she was coming out with this shit.
Iv noticed A LOT of her stories have gone, the cancer ward comments were in her highlights but that’s gone now. As well as feeding school highlights, for obvious reasons she wants to hide his starvation.

I don't think we have heard the last of this. She could still be held responsible for child neglect.

Simbama12 · Sep 7, 2021

What’s really annoyed me looking back at her feeding school posts that I never clicked at time, is the food- frazzles, mc Donald’s, nandos rice, choc cake… seriously?! No fruits/veg/textured foods/ fun coloured smoothies… nothing but shitty crap food. surely if you are goin to starve your child you look into weaning tips? I highly doubt a feeding school would in AUSTRIA would be recommending frazzles and mc Donald’s ffs.

Sendparent · Sep 7, 2021

His first holiday was to Tenerife. When he was just a few months old she started insisting she needed to take him abroad. She was asking for him to be discharged so they could go to spain, she finally got had him discharged in the Feb but within 2 days he was rushed back in vomiting blood. She rearranged the holiday for June, but he was that unwell he had not been discharged since he was readmitted in February so that holiday was cancelled too. The doctors asked her if she would be prepared to have a smaller holiday, one that wasn't abroad and just a few nights away but she stood her ground and insisted she wanted to take him to Spain as that was, in her eyes, already a smaller holiday compared to where she really wanted to go. Finally it was 3rd time lucky, he was discharged and she took him away with the ex fiance. She changed the destination from Spain to Tenerife, ignoring the doctors didn't even want her to risk going as far as Spain. She made out her need to take him abroad was to make memories with him, but if you was following back then you could tell it was more to do with having a new boyfriend who was minted and wanting to holiday at The Ritz.

Squiggle · Sep 7, 2021

Sendparent said:
His first holiday was to Tenerife. When he was just a few months old she started insisting she needed to take him abroad. She was asking for him to be discharged so they could go to spain, she finally got had him discharged in the Feb but within 2 days he was rushed back in vomiting blood. She rearranged the holiday for June, but he was that unwell he had not been discharged since he was readmitted in February so that holiday was cancelled too. The doctors asked her if she would be prepared to have a smaller holiday, one that wasn't abroad and just a few nights away but she stood her ground and insisted she wanted to take him to Spain as that was, in her eyes, already a smaller holiday compared to where she really wanted to go. Finally it was 3rd time lucky, he was discharged and she took him away with the ex fiance. She changed the destination from Spain to Tenerife, ignoring the doctors didn't even want her to risk going as far as Spain. She made out her need to take him abroad was to make memories with him, but if you was following back then you could tell it was more to do with having a new boyfriend who was minted and wanting to holiday at The Ritz.

"Making memories" but she couldn't even be fucked to do anything for Christmas. She makes me sick. Its all I can bring myself to say about her.

Sendparent · Sep 7, 2021

Cady1954 said:
Jesus Christ I hadnr seen those photos. What I really cant get my head around is the fact when he was that weight and the hospital put him back on feeds why weren't there red flags? May be there was a safeguarding plan that obviously she wouldn't let on about. But having said that if there had been she would have been the first to moan about.

I dont understand it, I cant understand how tonnes of people can report her and nothing is done. I feel so sorry for J's dad and J's big sister.

GobShyte64 · Sep 7, 2021

Sendparent said:
This might be one of the times when people might think she felt guilt, but she follows it with saying J was like that before the feeding school and we always blame ourselves for things that aren't in our control.

J was not like that before the feeding school and she was the only one who had control of this situation. GOSH and his team at his local hospital told her not to do this. She had control, the choice was up to her and she paid thousands to do it. He wasn't fit enough to go over to Austria, that should have been a red flag not to do it but she pushed for him to so the online programme where she is in the UK and the doctors are in Austria. That was even more risky. That should have been another red flag.

Before the feeding school she was claiming he vomited up to 50 times a day. (He would have been in hospital if that was the case) After the feeding school ended she justified making him do it by slipping up and saying J vomited on average once a day (not 50 like she claimed to the media and when she was fundraising) she said during the 56 days he did the feeding programme he only vomited 6 times.
That post is still there. She was then upset he was rushed into hospital and the first thing the doctors did was put him on feeds which made him vomit. She was almost blaming the hospital for putting him back on feeds. I've hid his face, mods can remove if they wish, she has never hid his face and has chosen to share him like this but mods are more than welcome to remove. From these pics you can see why the hospital put him straight onto feeds, you can also understand that if he was starving it might explain why he only vomited 6 times in 56 days. As a nurse you would hope that would have been another red flag, not something to justify why it was good to take him off his feeds and to moan about the hospital putting him back on.

She used to say the feeding school cost double what it did until it the true cost was put on here and then she started saying the right price. There was also a meet up in this country for the feeding plan, she was going to it to find out information properly but said it had been cancelled so went out instead but other SEN parents off insta attended it as it wasn't cancelled whatsoever. Not 100% but I think all those that went chose not to risk it.

That photo she is using of J on the slide for her souvenirs people might remember her posting them to her stories at the time. Unless they were following the threads before they wont know what was going on at that point.

People had said she never took him to the park or play area, few days later she takes him. Then we all suspected J wasn't actually with her, she started sharing pics/clips of him that looked pre-recorded, put up pre-recorded ads and tried to make it look like he was with her. His dad dropped her in it by saying he had had J for 10 days. There was no need to hide him going to stay with his daddy, but she didn't like people clocking on to the fact she had 60 hours a week of carers, 35 hours of school, 5 hours estimate for the school transport, her mum had him once a week for a few hours and J's dad had him at weekends often.

These pics kill me. Honestly. For this alone she needs a prison sentence. How the hell has she not been reported. Charged? She starved her kid for 56 days for what?! He looks like those malnourished kids on the adverts for kids in Africa.

AreYouJoking? · Sep 7, 2021

So many times in the last 2 years we watched as his weight plummeted and then he’d be admitted for an unrelated reason but within DAYS his face would be fuller, his cheeks filled out and his eyes less sunken. He would start to look his age rather than the picture of illness and regression she loved to portray. The longer the admission the healthier he would get. She would often leave with a new feeding plan but again within days she’d tweak it to her needs. She’d say it was because of his vomiting which again was never recorded or witnessed during his hospital stays.

Steph139 · Sep 7, 2021

It always annoyed me that she didnt take him to Disney or something. He was so bright and happy all the time imagine his little face at disney . And disney is just the top of a long list of places he would have loved. But she definitely could afford Disney! Dubai would not have been my first choice. Wasnt there drama surrounding that holiday as well? Think the person who paid for that holiday came out with a few truths after the holiday....cant remember exact details!

Sendparent · Sep 7, 2021

AreYouJoking? said:
So many times in the last 2 years we watched as his weight plummeted and then he’d be admitted for an unrelated reason but within DAYS his face would be fuller, his cheeks filled out and his eyes less sunken. He would start to look his age rather than the picture of illness and regression she loved to portray. The longer the admission the healthier he would get. She would often leave with a new feeding plan but again within days she’d tweak it to her needs. She’d say it was because of his vomiting which again was never recorded or witnessed during his hospital stays.

Changed his feed plan ALL the time but when she was trying to get media attention, donations and sympathy over losing carers, this is what she was tweeting.

HoGi · Sep 7, 2021

Sendparent said:
Changed his feed plan ALL the time but when she was trying to get media attention, donations and sympathy over losing carers, this is what she was tweeting.

Love how she tweeted things like this, but would do 10 Instagram stories pointing at paper and her laptop with what she is changing and how she is fitting xyz in and how if she reduces the volume but increases the frequency etc.

It was all in the public domain. 1 tweet doesn't undo the other posts/stories

GobShyte64 · Sep 7, 2021

mrslh said:
It’s safe to say she is vile and I do hate to say those words because she’s lost her son but I feel lessons have certainly not been learnt …. J deserved so so much more than he got from kaytee . He was such a bright beautiful clever little boy he really was and looking back now it was clear his needs was not met and he was in fact neglected . The day she discharged him for her birthday I knew as a mother I just would never do that but it’s kaytee she does not care it’s her own needs before his . When you have a child you out the child’s needs before yours always but she never did . j was in school she had NO job so had all day to herself why he was at school she had absolutely no exscuse to carry oncrying for carers because she did not need them . J was very good walking with his frame and playing with toys he had a special bed safe from falls so he didn’t need carers at all . as a mother myself to a child with needs giving medication takes all of five minutes even the peg feeds are not time consuming she had absolutely no reason to stop medications or feeds because she claims to have no time !!!

now her argument about needing carers was pathetic she had them overnight why she was partying that is not right at all … she then would spend all day why j was at school and with carers just sat in her car drinking Starbucks doing stories on Instagram with a full face of makeup now what mother has time for that !!! Claiming to be a single mother fighting for more hours ( as if four nights wasn’t enough ) !!! Moaning about not getting enough money yet everyday having Zara and gym shark orders coming

and don’t get me started on her discharging Her poorly son a week before his death just so she could go partying for her birthday and Thorpe park . As a 30 year old mother to a disabled child who had had what she said was his worst night ever to just bloody leave him to party is disgusting !!! A week before his death and that’s the kind of mother she was . So to any new members just remember all this before you fall for her crying on insta !!!

j Is no longer here and this mother is cashing in on his death selling merchandise. Now everyone grieves different but this Is beyond sick in my eyes . Can you imagine how his father will feel if he seen a stranger in Tesco wearing a T-shirt with his dead child on . I mean it’s obvious she neglected j but does this mother have any heart at all or feelings if how his farther might feel in all this . Shame on anybody who bought from that page because it’s disgusting . Why she’s on a retreat for the last how many weeks with her full face of make up cashing in on her sons death who is sat at that poor boys graveyard certainly ain’t here

rant over …

This!! Imagine you’ve just lost your kid & see a stranger wearing your dead sons face while doing your weekly shop! It would traumatise me. Why would you do that?! She knows her cash flow has stopped & now shes getting desperate. Hence the vid of him in the chapel of rest in an advert for her shop!! Who the hell would think recording someone in the chapel of rest is a good idea anyway. Anything for the gram i guess. Sicko.

mrslh · Sep 7, 2021

It’s staged a chapel of rest is no place for bloody pictures I hope none of you ever have to but I have and let me tell you the last thing I wanted to do was pose for photos holding my dead baby why someone photographs I’m sorry I said it but she’s sick and using that photo to gain sympathy and people to buy her merch is worst . I think if many people reported her and the things we have in these threads they most definitely would look into it because it is child neglect and I have never come across thread as bad as this for obvious child neglect it’s so sad poor j

Heretoread19 · Sep 7, 2021

mrslh said:
It’s staged a chapel of rest is no place for bloody pictures I hope none of you ever have to but I have and let me tell you the last thing I wanted to do was pose for photos holding my dead baby why someone photographs I’m sorry I said it but she’s sick and using that photo to gain sympathy and people to buy her merch is worst . I think if many people reported her and the things we have in these threads they most definitely would look into it because it is child neglect and I have never come across thread as bad as this for obvious child neglect it’s so sad poor j

Ok, I might sound awful but i've been in that situation. Myself and my husband have photos holding our baby in the chapel of rest but in our defence they are for us and will NEVER be put online for everyone to see.
Our son died when he was 3 days old. I only held him twice when was alive (once when he was covered in wires to try and help him and once when he died) He was 2 days old the first time I held him.

I wish I had never had to see or feel my child like that.

But there is one thing taking photos and another plastering them online.

Penny for them · Sep 7, 2021

Do you think her initial shock was tinged with huge guilt-her birthday was tinged with allot of sneaky behaviour-her son was unwell and she was posting coded stories /colour coordinated ones-she was in Hospital then not -she's definitely wanting what Ashley Cain has-though she slated the cancer wards at hospitals-at a time when she
Was ignorant to what Ashley/Saf were walking through as parents-she was nothing like them in terms of commitment to their daughter-she was very snake like. I feel very sad for her little boy x rip x

TheNurseMum #8

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