The Tim Tracker #166 All I want for my husband's birthday is a Nanny

Something else that jumped out at me. These home voogs are full of easter eggs. Tim says--J$ has been taking music class recently. Right Buddy---tell them what you learned about rhythm. J$ doesn't give a fuck and completely ignores Tim. You learned rhythm is a pattern, right? J$ continues to ignore.

Now, a couple of weeks ago, Tim is talking to J$ in the kitchen, J$ again, completely ignoring Tim. Tim says---oh, he can't hear a word I'm saying because of his ear problems. OK--so help me out here. Either your kid can't hear at all. Or you put him in music class. Would a kid who can't hear benefit from music class or getting his ears fixed?

My two cents on music class---this is an after school enrichment program because Tim can't make the regular 3pm pickup time and even though Jenn has a driver's license now, she surely can't be responsible for picking up her own kid from school.

Also, a kid who routinely ignores their parent would normally make me furious, but with a giant camera shoved in his face---you go Buddy! Don't let them use you for content.

And Jenn---forcing your baby's mouth open so you can film him is vile and disgusting. That shit should be illegal because there are nasty people out there that get off on shit like that---and you continue to do it. With your miracle children. Fuck you cunt.

That is the 7-day Fantasy cruise my daughter and I did.

eatcherheartout said:

Tim has a couple of long white hairs in his mustache that are gross to look at. He needs to trim them or pluck them right out.
I turned 39 today and I get a few white hairs in my eyebrows. I pluck them out. It takes 30 seconds. He really is just as lazy and gross as Jenn.

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Happy birthday!!

Happy Birthday Tattlers!!

I hate to ask this but, you guys think they are going for the Roy O again?

fiveleggedgoat said:

If Tim is upstairs in the room with the two boys, why the fuck is Jenn looking at them with the baby monitor?? Concentrate on your chickpea falafel or whatever. Maybe pay that much attention to your cremated pan.

I hope they ditch that monitor before Jackson hits puberty.

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Isn’t it entirely possible dim could roll over on Oliver?

xmasbdaygirl said:

Jenn talking about how super stressful the party was, so stressful, she couldn't plan for this upcoming cruise. She's out of her mind. Then she starts babbling....stress, stress, stress....can't come up with actual concrete examples of stress, there's even a weird edit cut where even she must have realized none of the stuff she's saying is actually stressful.

I cannot wait for their kids to have actual problems they have to face. Real places where they have to be. Real issues they have to deal with. I cannot wait for Jenn to experience real stress in parenting. Because teething, naps and laundry ain't it, girlfriend. You are in for it.

And oh goody, Da Baby is going to get his first haircut at the Harmony Barber Shop. Tim is STILL obsessed with that place, but couldn't remember the name. That Tracks.

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I wanted to punch her when she was talking about how stressful all that shit was. She is fucking awful. How do people with real problems listen to her seriously?

Jenn said that they wanted to get Jackson’s hair cut because it hasn’t been cut since she decided to do it herself. She says she did an okay job cutting his hair but wants to have a professional do it so it doesn’t look so weird. (She said she didn’t cut the back of his hair.) So which is it, Jenn? Did it come out okay or does it look weird?

Blessyourheart said:

I wanted to punch her when she was talking about how stressful all that shit was. She is fucking awful. How do people with real problems listen to her seriously?

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Right, it’s so infuriating. I seriously cannot understand how they have viewers that can watch them and look up to them and defend them.

PistachioNut said:

Isn’t it entirely possible dim could roll over on Oliver?

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Honestly, that was the first thing I was thinking about as well as why O was on the edge and why he was in the same bed as Grabby McBratty. Ugh.

xmasbdaygirl said:

Something else that jumped out at me. These home voogs are full of easter eggs. Tim says--J$ has been taking music class recently. Right Buddy---tell them what you learned about rhythm. J$ doesn't give a fuck and completely ignores Tim. You learned rhythm is a pattern, right? J$ continues to ignore.

Now, a couple of weeks ago, Tim is talking to J$ in the kitchen, J$ again, completely ignoring Tim. Tim says---oh, he can't hear a word I'm saying because of his ear problems. OK--so help me out here. Either your kid can't hear at all. Or you put him in music class. Would a kid who can't hear benefit from music class or getting his ears fixed?

My two cents on music class---this is an after school enrichment program because Tim can't make the regular 3pm pickup time and even though Jenn has a driver's license now, she surely can't be responsible for picking up her own kid from school.

Also, a kid who routinely ignores their parent would normally make me furious, but with a giant camera shoved in his face---you go Buddy! Don't let them use you for content.

And Jenn---forcing your baby's mouth open so you can film him is vile and disgusting. That shit should be illegal because there are nasty people out there that get off on shit like that---and you continue to do it. With your miracle children. Fuck you cunt.

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Its probably sad that my mind went to this first. However, with the way they were associating rhythm with pattern that's the first thing I thought about. I took a lot of music classes in school/have several relatives who majored in music and it was never explained that way to me. I guess if he's having hearing issues they might have him feeling vibrations but yeah....

And speaking of hearing issues, I bet they have had him in the pool getting ready for yet another infection. Parents of the year.

There is no way that they didn’t eat dinner until 9pm. At least not their first dinner.

And I bet this is a major reason Tim loooooovees cruising. He doesn’t have to eat nasty shit like this.

Just looked up the caloric information for that shit and it's about 2/3 of what should be her daily intake-though if she's on the Dr. Now plan 100 calories over. The amount of carbs in those things is ridiculous I don't know why you'd want quinoa in a taco shell on top of chickpeas that is just asking for trouble.

fiveleggedgoat said:

I hate to ask this but, you guys think they are going for the Roy O again?

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I am curious, too. They didn't book until a couple of months ago so it will be interesting to see what was available especially over a Spring Break cruise. It is going to be packed. I can't imagine them ever sailing non-concierge again, let alone a regular verandah room. This is the Suite Life of Tim and Jenny, ya know!

And Now It's Time to Splu said:

Just looked up the caloric information for that shit and it's about 2/3 of what should be her daily intake-though if she's on the Dr. Now plan 100 calories over. The amount of carbs in those things is ridiculous I don't know why you'd want quinoa in a taco shell on top of chickpeas that is just asking for trouble.

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That beige crap is 900 calories??!!!

hcslacs said:

There is no way that they didn’t eat dinner until 9pm. At least not their first dinner.

And I bet this is a major reason Tim loooooovees cruising. He doesn’t have to eat nasty shit like this.

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That really does look disgusting and I can’t believe it’s that many calories. They both finally are packing on the pounds but I’ve saying for years they really should be much fatter for the shit they eat.

How many calories is tetanus?

Just looked back to see how Jackson’s room was set up because I could not believe they would put the baby on the edge of the bed like that. I thought maybe he was against a wall or a guard rail. Sadly, there was nothing to to protect that poor baby. In fact, right next to his head is Jackson’s dresser. He could have hit his head on his fall down. I mean, why is Jenn looking at a baby monitor if NOT to monitor her fucking baby. If I saw that, I would be in a full sprint up those stairs to get the baby and transfer him to a crib. This kind of enrages me.

What if one of the reasons she's extra sTrEsSeD about this cruise is because they invited her BEST FRIEND Christina Glass and therefore for sure would book one of the suites to flex and so that Christina's husband can store his Guinness and other alcohol in their full-sized fridge of course. Watch out Christina Glass, you'll probably end up in a van tore with the nanny and Budley in a foreign country and then get COVID and ignored by your husband and your BEST FRIEND while they continue hanging out in their cuntcierge suite. *fake laugh*

I have to think that for sure they have to bring a nanny if Da Baby is going to be crawling all over the suite and so he doesn't go literally overboard cause lord knows his own parents won't be paying attention.

eatcherheartout said:

Jenn said that they wanted to get Jackson’s hair cut because it hasn’t been cut since she decided to do it herself. She says she did an okay job cutting his hair but wants to have a professional do it so it doesn’t look so weird. (She said she didn’t cut the back of his hair.) So which is it, Jenn? Did it come out okay or does it look weird?

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My thought when she said that was that go figure, she doesn't care if his haircut looked weird when he has to go to school, but she didn't want his haircut to look weird for their stupid cruise pictures that won't be put into the picture frames they'll buy and add to the dusty pile anyway. #priorities

PistachioNut said:

Isn’t it entirely possible dim could roll over on Oliver?

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I was also thinking that I wouldn't trust the creepy wide-eyed Budley who has no boundaries to not do something to his baby brother while Dimster's passed out.

Seriously that baby monitor shot is beyond creepy, for more reasons than one.

hcslacs said:

There is no way that they didn’t eat dinner until 9pm. At least not their first dinner.

And I bet this is a major reason Tim loooooovees cruising. He doesn’t have to eat nasty shit like this.

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This looks like it would come out the other end looking exactly the same.

Also Ginn called lemon pulp "lemon meat". Um okay.

So she can’t even eat dinner with Tim without being plopped in front of an iPad, just like her lil buddy.

Based on the timeline, I will agree they are currently on the Fantasy. So, two sea days gone and no mention on IG. I would assume if da baby won they couldn’t control themselves from blasting the news everywhere they could, but who knows.

And looks like Amanduh has already failed at posting every other day. I assume she was the chicken tender “friend”. Maybe she’s pissed that Jen stole her thunder with their own Huey McVoog.

Ah yes, nothing more appropriate on a family oops I mean travel channel than doing a parody of fucking R Kelly of all people.


"It's just invisible, that's why you can't see it!" -Ginn, probably

hcslacs said:

And looks like Amanduh has already failed at posting every other day. I assume she was the chicken tender “friend”. Maybe she’s pissed that Jen stole her thunder with their own Huey McVoog.

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I was also wondering if Amanduh was the “friend.” Jenn went on and on about her friend (who was in their car in front of them, I think she said?) doing a taste test between Raising Cane’s and Huey Magoo’s. I felt like she was purposely trying to steal thunder from her “friend.” So…maybe trying to sabotage Amanduh’s idea for her next YouTube video?