Plus I feel like it's easy to pin everything on Tim, but so much of their toxic upbringing is because of Ella. Wasn't she the one who decided to pull Heze out of school? She's deeply insecure and cannot stand the thought of her children having an attachment to or looking up to other women. She even saw bloody Rapunzel as a threat. I don't think Tim would have cared much about them staying in school (more time to himself!), and their lack of schooling is a major reason why their futures look so bleak.
She is entirely dissatisfied with her life and the choices that have led her up to this point, and takes it out on the children instead of her useless husband. Long story short, they both suck.