The advice thread for random problems

[Snippysnips]

Will you be in central London? That's quite easy to navigate with signs everywhere pointing out tube stations and the attractions. If you have google maps on your phone, you can also use that.

We were going be trying to stay as close to London Euston train station as we could, we can get a train from our town to there non stop an also I need to go to that station to get out to Watford for the shuttle bus for the Warner bros studios

 

[Snippysnips]

My frames and everything added* come to £250 or thereabouts. So hopefully the voucher takes it down a little

* didn't get the cheapest varifocals as the actual viewing gap was ridiculously small , I didnt get the next one up either but the one after.
antiglare coating as living down the lanes night driving with these newer headlights is dangeraus and any help is welcome. although many say they don't help ..

I only need mine really for reading, TV an driving to sharpen up the images an I don't drive much so i tried to get as cheap as I could since they aren't fully important to me since my eyes aren't too bad

personally I didn't find the antiglare to do anything for me, they were still the same as my previous that didn't have it, am not sure if its to do with the lens or not, my lens are really thin compared to my mums that are super thick an she said she seen a little difference with having the antiglare on hers

 

[Blondeangel2515]

To be completely honest with you. This was probably nothing emotional to him. He didn't want to be with you because if he did he wouldn't have been actively getting in relationships with different people, it'd have been you. He found someone willing to accommodate him cheating on his girlfriend in you.

I think it'd be good for you to put this behind you and work on self respect and boundaries, because you acknowledge he's cheated when he's carried on with this man, but he's done the same and more with you and you seem to think that is fine? Block them all, forget them all, just leave them alone and move on from it. I get this will be harder for you if you felt you had a connection but it isn't a healthy situation at all.

I don't agree at all with the way he has been with the girlfriend, but taking the right to come out from someone because you feel hurt is horrible.

I didn’t think it was right to cheat I told him I’m fully against cheating after seeing someone close in family doing it. That’s why when I managed to find his girlfriend I immediately told her. I didn’t tell her about him cheating on her with a guy out of spite I felt she had the right too know especially when he did it more than once behind her back and from research it was with someone they both work with otherwise I wouldn’t of told her about him being into guy stuff.

 

[Emiliabrazkow]

Hii, i hope im not on wrong thread.
Soo i also talked about this to my friends in Formula 1 Wags thread. There is this one boy at my dads town (my parents are divorced) and my best friend gave me his snap and that how I found him, so i sended him a snap a few times but he just opened it, so i did little digging on his insta ( we all done it at some point before you attack me) and found out that he is also F1 fan, my plan is to post om my private snap story me watching f1 race hoping that he will start snapping me back, my question is Should i do it, is it worth it??? Thank you

 

[TheGlossy]

My former flatmate texted me last night around 11.30pm saying they were thinking of me and our chats. I haven’t seen them since I moved out two years ago (we lived together for 4 years).

I didn’t see the text until this evening as it was on an old phone. I will respond, but I don’t know what to say…

 

[CatVonMe]

Random question but it’s stressing me out I’m currently in sick leave due to pregnancy and when my sick note runs out I have 4 weeks approved holidays and then strait onto maternity, Iv asked my work if this is ok and they keep dodging my question so is it ok? Is it allowed? I don’t want them last minute cancelling my holidays as I can’t go back to work and would have to try get in the doctors to extend my fit note.. I was also hoping for a wage boost from sick oau to holiday pay before maternity but I’m fine either way my work just isn’t very helpful with advice at all.

Another thing I’m paid monthly but was of sick for 2 weeks during my qualifying period for smp will I no longer get smp or do they add monthly wages together and divide to get the average amount?
Hoping someone can help thanks

Unless they have a policy that states otherwise then yes it is allowed. It’s a bit of an operational nightmare for them which is probably why they’re dodging answering but yes it is allowed.

 

[Snippysnips]

Anyone got any tips or tricks for getting cheap travel like websites that give deals or best sites or times to book on?

Trying to get me an my folks down to london from Edinburgh to Euston but it's coming up as around £300 to £500 for trains, I'd probably prefer to train down as the airport isn't the easiest to get to an I cant do bus with travel sickness, need to walk about at least

 

[Blondeangel2515]

Ok so I’m assuming advice on anything and this is a long one but… I want advice and opinions.

So I was talking to a guy for 5 years in the middle of those 5 years we were friends with benefits for two years. Due to work schedules (he works away during half term and then works at a school) we found it very hard to meet up but we spoke everyday got really close I think we both didn’t expect to get as close as we did.

Anyway, he told me he had a girlfriend which I was perfectly fine with because during the years we spoke and he got with someone we didn’t do anything just talked because we have similar hobbies he always tried to break boundaries and it’s hard to describe but vibe from messages would change when he got a girlfriend but this time it was odd nothing changed. So I questioned him having a girlfriend because it just didn’t seem like he had one. He would be really sexual with me I found him on socials (we only had each other on Snapchat and WhatsApp) and nothing to say he was in a relationship. To be fair everything he told me was always the truth and this was just before lockdown.

Fast forward to lockdown, we got more close. We never said “I love you” but we had our own phase to each other equivalent to it and nicknames too each other. He was very open to me and kept being the one mentioning meeting up but then mid way through convo he like “oh we can’t because I have a girlfriend” “I can’t give you want you want… you want a relationship but I have a girlfriend” I always told me I don’t want a relationship with him, well I did at the start when me and him started getting close both single but I told him why would I if hes like this with his girlfriend?

So during lockdown he messaged me and basically told me he cheated on his girlfriend with another man who they work with. He previously told me he had a gay experience and both times he said he’s more worried over my reaction then his girlfriends. I don’t understand why but . Anyway he was telling me he was watching porn then the guy FaceTimed him while they both jerked off and he felt like “a see you next Tuesday” and asked me what he should do I told him tell the girlfriend.

Since he got with this “girlfriend” he kept telling me he’s confused. He even messaged me right after seeing her (they’re long distance) that all he could think about was me and my body and when he sleeps with her he thinks of me. He’s even FaceTimed me jerking off and mouthing he loves me blowing me kisses and saying he wishes I was his girlfriend.

I ended up finding the girlfriend they ended up having each other as there profile pics on Facebook and told her. It didn’t go down well with her and he didn’t seem to bothered over it. I seen all this coming.
I know I did the right thing but I do feel bad a betrayed someone who I really care about and basically trusted me by being so open to me and “grassing” their sexuality to someone and that I may possibly hurt someone I have strong feelings for.

But I just can’t help question was mine and his bond was all a lie? How can someone be so open and honest with you when all along the chemistry/bond wasn’t even true? Why have someone in your life for so long to string them along. To be honest I expected this too happen long ago anyway so it’s not like it come to a surprise. I’m more surprised I’ve not heard from him in 18 months I don’t want to but I can’t help question what the hell we had

 

[Snippysnips]

Thanks guys, it will be easier to just leave it at King's Cross since I'll be leaving from there an the hotel isn't close

 

[littlepup]

I’m currently filling out the form to renew my provisional driving licence but don’t know which option to tick. It went out of date years ago and as I had given up on the idea of lessons I threw the card license away If I say renew with a new photo I think I need to send my old one with the application, but I don’t have it. It’s not lost or stolen either.
Does anyone know which option to choose before I contact DVLA?

It’s a renewal I think if the old one is out of date anyway.
DVLA are really helpful and you speak to real people, at least when I last contacted them

 

[BettyCrockerr]

I'm with a Housing Association and had to wait 2 weeks to get my hot water tank repaired. Wasn't classed as an emergency because I had an electric shower.
Hopefully @Melian gets theirs sorted out quicker.

We’re you without heating???

 

[cotdotton]

This is a bit of a sticky subject but maybe somebody here has been through similar. I’m with my partner almost two years and we are very happy together. He had a small bit of weight on when I met him similar to most people but in the last 3-6 months he has put on a lot more weight I’d guess maybe 2 stone. We were away in April and he said he wanted to eat healthier and lose some weight. I cook healthy dinners for us and the house is stocked with fruit/salad and nutritious food. He goes home once a week for a night or two and I think this is where the damage is happening as there will be takeaways and a night or two out drinking. If he calls to his aunt next door there is cake and sweet things on offer.
His own mother commented to him today that he had put on a few inches so it’s not just me that has noticed as I’m sure he has himself. He is a very intelligent guy but when I counted my calories back in April and May as I wanted to lose 1/2 stone for our holidays, unless meals were laid out for him and prepared he didn’t have much interest in eating healthy but yet said he wanted to lose weight.
Any ideas on what I could do to help support him? I don’t want it to become a bigger problem for him and I’d like for him to take better care of himself.

 

[monga]

Yes, I do, I charge them, then shut them down.

Maybe the batteries are done if they’re not holding the charge? My son’s lasts for age’s .

 

[Warpaint]

Do you get charged for foreign transactions in ROI with a British card? I was last in Dublin 2020 but can't remember for the life of me lol. Just weighing up how many euros to buy. Also how are they on cash there, do they still accept most places? (I know they went a bit Covid mad)

 

[Purrrrrrr]

Does anyone else get clothes of the washing machine and they have stains on that weren't there when they went in? It only happens to cotton/Jersey tshirts. How do you avoid it?

It's happened with a couple of different washing powders, I might try without fabric softener to see if that makes a difference.

Could it be the door seal? Sometimes softener leaves a scummy residue around the seal and as the washer finishes, the clothes touch it

 

[WilmaHun]

What would you all do in my situation? So my neighbours garden is an absolute shit hole, but that's not encroaching on my boundary so none of my business other than it being a complete eyesore when I look out my window. But the last couple of weeks they've started creating a massive pile of rubbish outside their back gate, it's a combination of black bags they couldn't fit in their bin and garden stuff they're getting rid of (kids toys etc). I've watched them just go to their back gate and chuck it out there. The problem is our back gardens back onto an alley way (not maintained by the council, but also not owned by us as part of our deeds) which we use as we have big double gates at the back of ours to allow us to park in our garden. The pile keeps encroaching in front of my gates, numerous times I've moved it back so it's outside theirs but I'll come home every day and have to get out my car and move a load of shit which they've chucked across the alley before I am able to open my gates and park my car. This morning I went out to collect my blue bin which had been emptied to find that when I opened my gate their blue bin hadn't been emptied as it was overflowing and they've just chucked a load of their recycling on to the pile which has obviously blown all over the alley.

I keep thinking I need to knock on their door and politely ask them to tidy it up or at least stop it from blocking my gatres and then if nothing happens make a complaint to the council - but my bf says that will just cause a dispute and we don't want to have any fallings out. To be honest though, they are a nuisance all round. I've caught their kids spraying my dog with a hose through the fence, they constantly shout and scream and swear and argue with each other. I'm just concerned if anything does lead to a dispute obviously when you sell your property it's a question asked on the forms as to whether there's been any disputes so I don't want to cause any issue. I also obviously generally don't want to be disliked by my neighbours. I'm stuck on what to do. They rent their property so they won't be bothered about the dispute side of things.

 

[Piff paff puff]

Just wondering... Can you have Internet without paying for a land line? Been with bt forever and probably paying more than I need to for it. I haven't used a landline phone in over a decade and they charge me for a bt sports service that I never wanted and haven't watched TV in decades.

 

[shadowcat5]

What do you mean when you say it’s bobbled? If you are sitting on the edge of the swimming pool or other scratxhy surfaces they will make the little balls. You’re not supposed to do that because of the fabric

So it does those little balls and it thins out. My old one had like fibres sticking through it. I don’t sit on the edge, use the steps to get in and out. I’ve even tried washing them by hand but they still do it.

 

[Melian]

I bought a camelbak rip off from Amazon last year, forgot all about it and left it hanging in my garage still with water in the bladder. It might have been squash actually Can I clean it after all this time or shall I just bin it and try and get a new bladder?? If I can clean it what’s the best thing to use? Thank you

Someone in the running thread may have some better advice.

The best thing to clean (I use this for my bottles) I think is milton / baby bottle cleaner. Just had a quick look on Google and there are videos talking you through to clean it.

 

[Poptart]

Looking for fashion advice… I’m wanting a winter coat that will last a life time. Was looking for a parka style, down fill, very warm and waterproof etc. Looked at Canada Goose but don’t like the big labels and felt too flashy, then looked at Holland Cooper but all made with polyester and filled with it too! Did look at Woolrich but no coats are long enough as I outdone want it to cover by bum and tops of my thighs. Anyone got any suggestions? Ideally want Parka style, down fill with fur trim collar which is detachable. Thanks

Have you had a look at Barbour? They have some gorgeous coats! I adore mine it is SO warm!