The advice thread for random problems #2

[littlepup]

Sketchers are apparently great. My Mum, MIL and SIL swear by them.

I realise my privilege by saying this is a problem but I’m going to go for it… we’re lucky enough to have a cleaner, we’ll call her Jane. Yesterday my 2yr old child walked into the bedroom and said “Jane tidied up bed” -it’d been made and sheets changed.
Child loves Jane, Jane counts them as a grandchild, they give Jane a kiss goodbye, she came to their bday party, always excited that Jane is coming and to show her things, Jane is family.
But I don’t want my child to think that a cleaner is ‘normal’. Child helps mummy with laundry, knows ‘tidy up’ etc. Also knows mummy works for “Dave” who is our friend and people have jobs but do I explain it’s Jane’s job while Mummy plays? Just generally don’t know how to address it? Any advice would be appreciated.

 

[petitspois]

Sketchers are apparently great. My Mum, MIL and SIL swear by them.

I realise my privilege by saying this is a problem but I’m going to go for it… we’re lucky enough to have a cleaner, we’ll call her Jane. Yesterday my 2yr old child walked into the bedroom and said “Jane tidied up bed” -it’d been made and sheets changed.
Child loves Jane, Jane counts them as a grandchild, they give Jane a kiss goodbye, she came to their bday party, always excited that Jane is coming and to show her things, Jane is family.
But I don’t want my child to think that a cleaner is ‘normal’. Child helps mummy with laundry, knows ‘tidy up’ etc. Also knows mummy works for “Dave” who is our friend and people have jobs but do I explain it’s Jane’s job while Mummy plays? Just generally don’t know how to address it? Any advice would be appreciated.

I really wouldn’t worry- just say that you have some spare money at the end of the week and you chose to spend it on a cleaner to help out. You could spend it on clothes, nails or nights out so it’s not a privilege issue I don’t think.

 

[CoffeeMamma]

I really wouldn’t worry- just say that you have some spare money at the end of the week and you chose to spend it on a cleaner to help out. You could spend it on clothes, nails or nights out so it’s not a privilege issue I don’t think.

I work for a family (I can’t really explain how without giving away a huge part of who I am IRL) and I love being a part of them. The littlest one is 2 and I say I’m “mummy’s friend who helps out”. Honestly Jane will be happy it’s such a big part of your life.

 

[shadowcat5]

Sketchers are apparently great. My Mum, MIL and SIL swear by them.

I realise my privilege by saying this is a problem but I’m going to go for it… we’re lucky enough to have a cleaner, we’ll call her Jane. Yesterday my 2yr old child walked into the bedroom and said “Jane tidied up bed” -it’d been made and sheets changed.
Child loves Jane, Jane counts them as a grandchild, they give Jane a kiss goodbye, she came to their bday party, always excited that Jane is coming and to show her things, Jane is family.
But I don’t want my child to think that a cleaner is ‘normal’. Child helps mummy with laundry, knows ‘tidy up’ etc. Also knows mummy works for “Dave” who is our friend and people have jobs but do I explain it’s Jane’s job while Mummy plays? Just generally don’t know how to address it? Any advice would be appreciated.

Not sure how old your child is but I don’t think it’s an issue cause they will eventually grow up to realise not everyone has cleaners. It’s a bit like kids who don’t have divorced parents don’t realise that other people only live with 1 parent/step parents etc until they get old enough to understand different life experiences and perspectives.

 

[littlepup]

Thanks for the replies.

I work for a family (I can’t really explain how without giving away a huge part of who I am IRL) and I love being a part of them. The littlest one is 2 and I say I’m “mummy’s friend who helps out”. Honestly Jane will be happy it’s such a big part of your life.

We’ve just filled out a nursery admission form and Jane is listed as “important people in my life”, they so regularly talk about her - I think explaining that she helps us is the way to go.
Maybe as she they get older we’ll discuss how we get we get help with things we’re not good at or can’t find time for and we help others with things they’re not good at or don’t have time for.

 

[rainbowlemon]

Sketchers are apparently great. My Mum, MIL and SIL swear by them.

I realise my privilege by saying this is a problem but I’m going to go for it… we’re lucky enough to have a cleaner, we’ll call her Jane. Yesterday my 2yr old child walked into the bedroom and said “Jane tidied up bed” -it’d been made and sheets changed.
Child loves Jane, Jane counts them as a grandchild, they give Jane a kiss goodbye, she came to their bday party, always excited that Jane is coming and to show her things, Jane is family.
But I don’t want my child to think that a cleaner is ‘normal’. Child helps mummy with laundry, knows ‘tidy up’ etc. Also knows mummy works for “Dave” who is our friend and people have jobs but do I explain it’s Jane’s job while Mummy plays? Just generally don’t know how to address it? Any advice would be appreciated.

You could say sometimes people just need extra help in the house. I think two is too young personally to be worried. The banker family next door had a nanny and a cleaner. I’ve had people in school with drivers and one with two bodyguards.
---
The Jaqueline Wilson books are actually really good for examples of different families.

 

[CoffeeMamma]

Thanks for the replies.


We’ve just filled out a nursery admission form and Jane is listed as “important people in my life”, they so regularly talk about her - I think explaining that she helps us is the way to go.
Maybe as she they get older we’ll discuss how we get we get help with things we’re not good at or can’t find time for and we help others with things they’re not good at or don’t have time for.

Little one did the same. I go to their house 2/3 times a week every week and have done since she was born. She doesn’t know a life without me randomly popping up but she doesn’t understand my role in the household, just that I’m a friend who helps at home. I think the relevance to their life is genuinely more important, honestly. We hear in the news about kids who don’t have a safe adult and it’s amazing if kids grow up surrounded by safe people to turn to when things are tough. It will broaden their outlook and they will look back on this time fondly I think, not think it was odd.

 

[Slaybutter]

I need a good website for electronic birthday cards. Does anyone have a recommendation that they’ve used?

 

[Snowjoke]

I need a good website for electronic birthday cards. Does anyone have a recommendation that they’ve used?

Thortful

 

[disillusionedbythegram]

I need a good website for electronic birthday cards. Does anyone have a recommendation that they’ve used?

I like thortful as I think they do 4 for £10 so I often buy a lot at once

 

[Pesky Tarian]

I need a good website for electronic birthday cards. Does anyone have a recommendation that they’ve used?

Jacquie Lawson, wonderful cards. If memory serves it's £7 for a month or £20 odd for the year.

 

[CoffeeMamma]

I need a good website for electronic birthday cards. Does anyone have a recommendation that they’ve used?

I just use Free Prints Photo Cards

 

[Snippysnips]

Does anyone use discord an knows why this is happening?

It doesn't happen on any of the other channels am on, only this one, I've tried uninstalling an reinstalling it but I still can't get any of the other threads to come up, it's stuck on this one thread an refuses to show the rest, it's the only channel that does this

 

[CoffeeMamma]

Any cheap travel suggestions? I have a mate needing to go North East- Liverpool Eurovision weekend and it’s looking at over £100 on trains. She doesn’t drive.

 

[JoeBloggs]

Any cheap travel suggestions? I have a mate needing to go North East- Liverpool Eurovision weekend and it’s looking at over £100 on trains. She doesn’t drive.

Could she go by coach? They are always cheaper but take longer. Or depending where you are a cheap flight?

 

[CoffeeMamma]

Could she go by coach? They are always cheaper but take longer. Or depending where you are a cheap flight?

I couldn’t find a coach unfortunately! Flight might be a good shout though!

 

[OnlyHereForTheLolz]

Any cheap travel suggestions? I have a mate needing to go North East- Liverpool Eurovision weekend and it’s looking at over £100 on trains. She doesn’t drive.

From where is she travelling?

 

[CoffeeMamma]

From where is she travelling?

Newcastle is our nearest city

 

[OnlyHereForTheLolz]

Newcastle is our nearest city

The reason I ask is because sometimes taking a different trainline/coach from the next city can be a lot less expensive. My local train to London is about £15 but if I go a town over I can get tickets from £3!

But it looks like a quick google shows that tickets are about £30 one way

 

[CoffeeMamma]

The reason I ask is because sometimes taking a different trainline/coach from the next city can be a lot less expensive. My local train to London is about £15 but if I go a town over I can get tickets from £3!

But it looks like a quick google shows that tickets are about £30 one way

Newcastle - Liverpool on the day she needs to go is minimum £80 it’s her fault for leaving it last minute and the fact it’s Eurovision!