The dynamics are just so messed up. If I had a partner who fell ill then there is no doubt that I would do their personal care if required, but that would be 1. if totally required (if there was an easy option to keep it separate I think that would be better for the relationship in the long term) and 2. that power dynamic wouldn't the total foundations of our WHOLE relationship, it would be a small part of it. It's as if they try and present this as a totally health situation that no one should ever question any way whatsoever, or else you're supporting ableism. Like, at least acknowledge it's not an ideal situation. They throw ableism at you if you even hint that having to wipe your partners ass isnt a totally preferable bit of circumstance! Infact no, they go further. They say its ENHANCES there situation and intimacy, like we're all missing out on the good stuff in our relationships. Hannah totally doing her 'Nope, nope nope, you haven't experiences real love until you've had a finger up your partners asshole trying to dislodge an errand poop. Come back to me when you know what real love is'. Though, Im sure for a veeeery select group of people out there this much is true, but who am i to kink shame?!