She plays on the abuse too much it’s not cool and yes I am saying this as someone who has been abused (several times in fact) and yes by all means share your story if you must but don’t use it as an excuse for life it’s the same with people who blame their upbringing for being twats when they can choose to change the future or not. Why get engaged if there is no interest in a wedding basically they can’t afford to get married I don’t understand if they were happy anyway why even bother with all this tit