recap of everyone's favourite losers - Soaf and Oaf <3
- Soaf's sister Jess Ratbags has had a beautiful brown haired baby girl - I'm sure Soaf is SEETHING, and has already had the turkey baster out.
- Dave has toothache, it's been the worst pain a single human has ever encountered. Ever. Poor Dave hasn't been able to obnoxiously sing, or work out in the GEM at a reasonable hour, but he has managed to deepthroat a rocket lolly at 8am so it can't be that bad.
- Chip has been packed off to Scotland with his "grandparents" as Soaf and Oaf are off on, what I'm sure will be a hilariously awkward, possibly ~gifted~ trip to Legoland with Barney. Will Dave's calves stop him riding on rides? Or will it be his vast bulk, find out soon!
- They've dropped their failed "upload every day" schedule and are now uploading a slog every other day.
- Dave still has hilarious tiny feet
- Barney is still a gorgeous wee lad, but Soaf has this weird thing for him being covered in food and then left like it. The resentment is REAL. Barney has also taken to hitting Soaf and throwing stuff, which will be a nice quality for him to have growing up, as his SUPERSTAR parents just laugh.
- Soaf did some laundry. They've lived in the beige bungalow for a year and have only just bothered to put a washing line out. LAZY
- Dave still can't drive.
I've probably missed something!