Scousebird blogs #15 Scouse Bird: The Joe Exotic of Merseyside

[Howdyhi]

Swear down, honest to god, not even messin’ but why does she dress and look like she’s 10 years behind. The flat hair, the side part and fringe(no shade to anyone that has this btw, each to their own and if you do have it I highly doubt you’re bragging on your insta stories that you’re gonna be the next Gigi hadid) she hurts my eyes

Having the audacity to call herself a woman of scouse nationality yet walk round with that barnet:

ELECTRIC CHAIR!

I’m not Scouse but have a lot of Scouse friends and family. I’ve never ever ever met a scouser like Jeff. The way she dresses, looks etc. She’s like a social experiment, I can’t get my head around her

 

[TheGhostofShirleyBallas]

Well I hope that agency aren’t paying her then or have cut the fee because surely she’s limiting engagement? @TheGhostofShirleyBallas is this what happens?

Influencer contracts require a fully open account and proof of engagement analytics before payment. I very much doubt a proper contract is involved here though, she probably posted it for £50 and a crate of Stella.

Just so you all know, I'm no critic of sex workers, do what you've gotta do to get by. But once again, she's demonstrating she has zero idea of how to curate a key demographic.

 

[Blair-Waldorf]

Why don’t you have these conversations when she gets home from school? Oh wait

 

[TaylorMomsen]

Anyone from the surrounding areas OF Liverpool. Technically I'm a wool cos I don't have a purple bin but I've still got an L postcode

haha for me it's anyone who doesn't have a purple wheelie bin in the UK no matter how far away from Liverpool they are:
Alton Towers "proper full of wools"
Heathrow airport "fucking wools everywhere"

I know it's technically not the correct way of using it, but always a fun word to say!

 

[Dwight]

I used to take miniatures out with me on nights out when I was literally a skint 20yr old student and even then I was slightly ashamed, not ashamed enough not to do it haha but certainly ashamed enough not to gloat about it... nevermind brag online like it was some sort of achievement. Honestly couldn't imagine doing it now in my adult life, and I don't even claim to have made a million

Good grief she is tragic.

 

[TheGhostofShirleyBallas]

Your girl Shirl decided to look into laser hair removal today, get it done in time for Strictly 2021. First site I went on proclaimed "used by famous influencers", with a video of Jeff gurning into her phone, going on about how "boss" it is. I'll be taking my cash elsewhere, can't trust an endorsement from someone with that beard.

 

[MariellaMac86]

just watched the stories about the dating. STEPH - you are doing online dating WRONG.

it is immpooossssiiibbblllleeeee to develop a genuine connection with someone you’ve never met. Any connecting you feel you have prior to meeting them is alllll innnnn youuuurrrr miiiinnndddd.

It’s actually you projecting the relationship you want onto this digital stranger on the back of them saying something you liked to here.

I think this is a mistake a lot of (primarily) girls make.

In the girls head there’s this chemistry and connection prior to meeting up. They end up having a relationship in their heads that isn’t actually taking place. Then, when it inevitably doesn’t go anywhere they end up in the depths of a breakup from something that didn’t even happen.

It’s not just Steph I’ve seen this happen with loads of girls and I say girls because it seems to be mostly a girl thing. Just stop bloody doing it!

 

[Blair-Waldorf]

Did she say ‘so I’ve got my little gorgeous head here to cheer me up’ or are mine ears deceiving me

Your child isn’t there for you to pick and choose when you see them depending on your mood you fuckin wank stain. And fancy having that type of conversation around your 4 year old

 

[battybetty2]

Sounds like they all need to grow up.

Honestly it’s actually pathetic reading that.

I actually do feel really sorry for their daughters the pair of them are in their thirties. It’s not like their teenagers. You wouldn’t guess the way their both carrying on.

PUT YOUR CHILD FIRST!! stop dating until your mentally stable to do so.
Your not mentally stable Stephanie so how are you expecting to meet someone.
Jake was bad enough but then you slept with a married man who worked in the opticians ... who was also shag*ing about ten different women and you didn’t use contraception and put yourself in the danger. Going on Instagram telling everyone you’ve been checked for STDS. You’ve already got herpes. THATS NOT NORMAL!!
She is mentally unstable that much is obviously with the highs and lows.
She is a lot to take on so she needs to lower her standards with “looks” not personality. She needs to stop seeing herself as a ten that might help to.
What is she going to be doing with her free time now she’s basically going to have someone running her shop for her. The thing is she gets people in to work for her. They make themselves known on her social media ... get a few followers and then go do their own thing.
I would just concentrate on your failing business and your daughter not be saying all over social media that your miserable when you’ve got a beautiful daughter sitting next to you. It’s really sad.
Children think their responsible for their parents moods at that age. It’s really psychologically damaging what she’s doing. Ignoring her child on her phone and saying how sad she is. Put the phone down and be there for your daughter my god!!!
Makes my blood boil.

 

[MrsPurchase]

What the hell is she wearing??? And she just said nature is healing again

I honestly don’t know how she can call herself a scousebird with her dress sense.
Also, I totally agree, Jeff stop trying to make ‘nature is healing’ a thing!

 

[Babygirlie21]

Slight derailment but finally got through the KHM wiki, what an absolute SHEOW. Another minty bitch that really shouldn't be insta-famous in any way, shape or form.
I don't follow her but knew of her when the Echo did a piece on her years ago, and I remember thinkin then that 1) from the pics they showed on the Echo her makeup was a bit garish and wasn't anythin special, lets face it she ain't no Pat McGrath is she?? And 2) just looked back on the article now and she had made up "celebs" including people from TOWIE. Oh yeah, they're "celebs" alright fuckin delusional.
I also cannot believe that she'd make a fake account specifically to pretend it's a troll and trash her own baby for followers, wtf was she thinkin?? That is some level of absolute psycho shit if ever I saw it. I honestly can't keep up with those threads though it's insane and how many there is?! She has pissed off a looooot of people.

 

[Phoebephoeebs]

She really considers herself representational of 30 year olds? An old bum bag with a shapeless C&A dress designed in 1983, an anorak and hobnailed boots? Nature may be healing but my retinas are burning.

I’d argue that most 30-something mothers in this “post apocalyptic world” are more looking forward to reacquainting their children with the rest of society, and letting them finally enjoy days out and seeing family and friends (outdoors of course) rather than yet another day/night on the drink.

 

[Blair-Waldorf]

Thanks girl @MrsPurchase

@Yerma ahh girl I’m the same every time I go to my ma’s I look at photo albums she thinks I’m insane

White tip acrylics in the year of our lord 2021
GET THE FUCK OUTTA HERE

 

[StormSolitaire]

That Moschino belt reminds me of the little brasses in school as they had bags with that lettering on, obvs not real Moschino but from Frocks or some other shite shop on the first floor of St Johns (not my beloved Storm obvs), the ‘posher’ kids would get their jarg ones from hols in Turkey or somewhere.

Nasty mid 90s school memories unlocked here I never knew I had

 

[Dot_Cotton]

What I don’t get with this is, desperate to get out but spend most of the time on your phone. You can see her mate bored in the reflection if her glasses. She must be awful to go out with. “I’ve not seen me mates for 12 months so I’m a bit emosh” well fucking see them then! No one is arsed about those awful earrings I can guarantee. Can you actually imagine anyone but her wears those?

 

[Tomi2015]

I swiped left on her today on fb dating and instantly went,”fuck!” cos is should’ve screenshotted it! Shall update if she appears again! And it was her. I’d recognise those stupid fucking earring anywhere. Stephanie, Crosby

Stephanie Crosby. Likes Gin (even though I told a fib and said I hate it so someone would send me some for free), Asevi and chomping on chocolate starfish. My legs are open more than Mr Patels corner shop. I haven’t got no kids…I think. You don’t even have to take me for a posh meal, I’m yours for a packet of space raiders and a twix. Please bring air freshener ( I will sell you the Spanish stuff) or a peg for your nose because my bedroom smells like the bin behind a seafood restaurant on a hot day

 

[MariellaMac86]

Don’t tell me those bloody diaries are still knocking about. It’s April

 

[Howdyhi]

Imagine! I only found out who she was the other day, I need to book a week off work to read the threads.

Yes shirl, get on the KHM thread. She took her 8 month baby who can’t walk or stand yet to a fucking ballet class today, we need your dancing critique obvs.

 

[TheGhostofShirleyBallas]

Jeff is gonna have a social media breakdown soon. Just watched that cringy as fuck,”please give me free food” outside the Greek place on bold street. It’s proper pathetic how she’s grasping at every opportunity to get stuff for free.

Also, did she fuck see someone from Bumble. It’s mad all these things happen to her every single day! So popular even her own kid can’t get time to spend with her

Cock before Cora.

 

[TJ90]

She’s had a whole year to think of nice outfits to wear and that’s what she comes up with. Circle of shhhheeeeoooowwwww as she says