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lizzie2707
Well-known member
Everything about this is magical oh my god. “Lidl to Erimentha’s Waitrose” is an incredible line.
CalatheaLater
Chatty Member
Thank you for the summary as always!Keeping these chapter overviews behind a spoiler, that way if Ruby is choosing to read this thread, she can walk on by. These are not intended as a personal attack on Ruby. I once noted in a diary entry the, "definite sexual tension," between me and an A level tutor. Narrator: there was no sexual tension.
Erimentha gets up, makes porridge and makes a list. Items include talking to Kimberly and Izzy to clarify the exact reasons for their unkindness. "From there, adjustments can be made as necessary." Adjustments?Re-education camps? Frontal lobotomy? The dark turn this novel is taking scares me.
At school, a friend is doing last night's homework and Erimentha offers to check it, as she is obviously far more capable than the adult paid to do it. A new antagonist, Beth, pulls a dick move by throwing Erimentha's post-it pad out of the window. She demands a meeting with the three of them to hash this out. Writes a new post-it to remind herself.
In history class, Mr Aldridge asks the class about Oliver Cromwell. Erimentha's hand shoots up, but given that she is already monopolising the class, he gives the answer to another student, and she said he was a ruler in Britain. She lifts her hand even higher to the ceiling, to the point of almost standing up. She will not allow this intellectual inferior get the final say! Now in real life, the teacher would take the reins and not allow this show-off to embarrass another classmate, but as this is fiction/autobiographical, the brow-beaten Mr Aldridge has no resolve left. She dazzles with her answer and is given a fucking housepoint.
It's the end of class and it's time to confront the others. They say she has no sense of humour and doesn't socialise. To be fair, this is fairly constructive, they haven't name-called and so far seems accurate.
To demonstrate there is actual bullying going on, Kimberly tells Erimentha that she's decided the whole year group will hate her, and throws her gum at her.
After classes, she sees her friend Simone who is excited to come to her place tomorrow. Erimentha has already made a list of what's required for the volcano. They don't keep vinegar in the house as Nathan's allergic (another fault of his) and Simone agrees to bring it, as well as dry ice.
Where is Simone, an 11 year old going to get dry ice from?? I'm doing a PhD in chemistry and I don't even know where to source it outside of a chemistry department.
Also actually dying that Nathan is allergic to vinegar, a naturally occuring acid (which, according to wikipedia, is a component of vaginal lubrication. I hope to poor man doesn't go into anaphylaxis the first time he has sex)
Satisfying Click
VIP Member
"Hi Ruby, I'm in Year 10, in a shitty underfunded state school, I'd love to pair with you, sadly it will only be temporary as I'll be going off to have my 2nd baby, but my classmate will be returning from rehab real soon."
lizzie2707
Well-known member
There's something unbelievably patronising about the double xx at the end of that message lmao
This is going to sound weird af but I sort of hope her next book is a sequel: Erimentha Parker’s To Do List 2.0: Going Off to Uni
‘Chronic overachiever Erimentha Parker is off to university! Having been Head Girl and gotten all A*s at A levels she thinks she’s fully prepared for what her prestigious university has to offer and is excited to start this new journey of her life. She is off to a great start having met some lovely new friends to go to the bookshop with and even joined the anti-bullying society but she quickly discovers uni isn’t quite what she pictured it to be – her noisy flatmates aren’t always the most considerate of her important needs and her lecturers aren’t easily impressed with her having memorised the text within the first week of classes. In this addition, an 18 year old Erimentha struggles with growing up, adjusting to a new environment, and overcoming her destructive perfectionism and need to be the Best of the Best in her first year of university.’
‘Chronic overachiever Erimentha Parker is off to university! Having been Head Girl and gotten all A*s at A levels she thinks she’s fully prepared for what her prestigious university has to offer and is excited to start this new journey of her life. She is off to a great start having met some lovely new friends to go to the bookshop with and even joined the anti-bullying society but she quickly discovers uni isn’t quite what she pictured it to be – her noisy flatmates aren’t always the most considerate of her important needs and her lecturers aren’t easily impressed with her having memorised the text within the first week of classes. In this addition, an 18 year old Erimentha struggles with growing up, adjusting to a new environment, and overcoming her destructive perfectionism and need to be the Best of the Best in her first year of university.’
coffeehead
Member
I don't think she has donated the money... I think she has been very careful with her word choice there when she says "reinvested" - I think she's keeping it but will mentally earmark it as going towards production of content about the holocaust or whatever. I think she will justify spending it on reading material about the holocaust so that she can then 'educate" her followers about it. If she had donated it to a charity, she would have written donated... I think she's been sly here
YellowLadybird
Chatty Member
Nah, but they really went in on the Opium and Cocaine
Griftwood
VIP Member
You have called it into the world. First rule of urban legends: Don’t call it into being. Don’t invite it in. I’m holding you responsible for whatever ensues.
GoinDowntown
Well-known member
Tag yourself I'm Nathan
BedtimeBrew
New member
This whole debacle has wound me up so much I've literally made an account just to comment here. The fact that a girl with so much money she became a landlord in her teens has accepted payment for a post about the holocaust is absolutely insane? I think a lot of Ruby's fans like to think of her as a quaint little girl sat in her bedroom making videos about reading and morning routines and they fail to see that she's the same as every other influencer, she's carefully controlled by her management and she's motivated by money. Beneath the weird Victorian porcelain doll persona is a grown woman looking to make her social media money while she can.
gingerteacup
Chatty Member
missmina
VIP Member
Poor Martha
Satisfying Click
VIP Member
Someone on Twitter commented that they want a Hunger Games style dystopia, only with StudyTubers who are forced together on an island without their schedules 
Satisfying Click
VIP Member
There's no chapter 10 in the book, so we're ploughing ahead.
After making a volcano model together and being one of her only friends, Erimnetha decides to avoid Simone for the whole week, and hangs out with a new person, Melody.
There's a girl in Year 5 hanging out in a quiet room and Erimentha notes how short she is compared with Nathan.
Erimentha presents her extra work on hurricanes. Afterwards, Kimberly taps her on the forearm and Erimentha notices her fingers are cold - she assumes this is because of poor circulation due to lack of exercise. Girl, who asked you?!
The other girls start throwing stuff, she goes to the bathroom, drinks some water wondering how much water it would take to kill a person and that she'll look it up [Ed: I can't make this funny, sorry]
Miss Soloman leaves the room and someone has sabotaged Erimentha's fountain pen, ink everywhere, much mess. Kimberly's eyes are pale and cold again, maybe this is how she shapeshifts. Miss Soloman returns, asks what has happened, she has bought an orange with her (is this supposed to be a visual warning, the same way Francis Ford Coppola did in the Godfather series?). Miss Soloman tells Erimentha to clean it up, Erimentha cries.
There's a girl in Year 5 hanging out in a quiet room and Erimentha notes how short she is compared with Nathan.
Erimentha presents her extra work on hurricanes. Afterwards, Kimberly taps her on the forearm and Erimentha notices her fingers are cold - she assumes this is because of poor circulation due to lack of exercise. Girl, who asked you?!
The other girls start throwing stuff, she goes to the bathroom, drinks some water wondering how much water it would take to kill a person and that she'll look it up [Ed: I can't make this funny, sorry]
Miss Soloman leaves the room and someone has sabotaged Erimentha's fountain pen, ink everywhere, much mess. Kimberly's eyes are pale and cold again, maybe this is how she shapeshifts. Miss Soloman returns, asks what has happened, she has bought an orange with her (is this supposed to be a visual warning, the same way Francis Ford Coppola did in the Godfather series?). Miss Soloman tells Erimentha to clean it up, Erimentha cries.
gingerteacup
Chatty Member
Because she loves tea so much, she decided to show off her gymnast flexibility and become a human tea pot. She might as well, because all she spouts is crap.
Wow. This is all so unnecessary. There are charities whose exact job is to educate kids on the Holocaust by taking them on trips, arranging events, etc. How about she donates to one of those instead of half-assing something herself? Is it because she wouldn't be able to take any credit for it or profit in any way or get visibility?
I'm sorry but this whole thing is extremely suspicious.
Also a long time lurker here - I work in libraries and honestly you’re a terrible person if you’re disparaging books purely because they’re teen pink sparkly books. If you’re reading Ruby’s book and also enjoy books like this, this could really affect you. I think it’s a form of mild internalised misogyny that just because something is pink and aimed at young girls it must be bad and not worth your time, you stuck up snob (mostly referring to Erimentha here)(Looong time lurker here)
The hilarious review of Ruby's book made me dig mine out and re read it. The snobbishness of Erimentha is unbearableI've complied some of my favourite extracts that are too good to not share. It's obvious Ruby has a fantasy of being some kind of child prodigy - it really does read like fan fiction of herself. I think she is trying to live out this fantasy in her real life and trying to avoid growing up and realising she is of average intelligence.