Racism Discussions

[bobby768]

sorry just to add my two cents on the racism discussion. i don't think we should ever defend a white person for 'trying their best' - we live in a institutionally racist world and their best just isn't good enough. if she had learnt anything throughout this time then she'd realise how bad that dream post was. as someone said her speaking was more important than the person's lived experience AND IT WAS PERFORMATIVE EVEN IN HER DREAM, AND THEN SHE POSTED TO EVERYONE ON HER INSTAGRAM THAT SHE DREAMS ABOUT TRYING TO BE BETTER. duck YOU TANYA DO BETTER.
I'm sick of white people getting away with everything cause 'they don't know enough' - they live in a system that (especially her) constantly benefits and profits off of the backs of black people. she's had plenty of time to educate herself. she was posting about BLM two months ago!!!!!!!!!

 

[littlepup]

sorry just to add my two cents on the racism discussion. i don't think we should ever defend a white person for 'trying their best' - we live in a institutionally racist world and their best just isn't good enough. if she had learnt anything throughout this time then she'd realise how bad that dream post was. as someone said her speaking was more important than the person's lived experience AND IT WAS PERFORMATIVE EVEN IN HER DREAM, AND THEN SHE POSTED TO EVERYONE ON HER INSTAGRAM THAT SHE DREAMS ABOUT TRYING TO BE BETTER. duck YOU TANYA DO BETTER.
I'm sick of white people getting away with everything cause 'they don't know enough' - they live in a system that (especially her) constantly benefits and profits off of the backs of black people. she's had plenty of time to educate herself. she was posting about BLM two months ago!!!!!!!!!

What do you propose white people do though? They will never be black, they will never completely understand. Education is an ongoing process and people get things wrong, is it better to stay quiet? I don’t think people can win in this situation. If you stay quiet or speak up. How do you ‘do better’ and avoid mistakes In a process of education?
I’m not being rhetorical, I’m genuinely asking

 

[creme.egg92]

What do you propose white people do though? They will never be black, they will never completely understand. Education is an ongoing process and people get things wrong, is it better to stay quiet? I don’t think people can win in this situation. If you stay quiet or speak up. How do you ‘do better’ and avoid mistakes In a process of education?
I’m not being rhetorical, I’m genuinely asking

I agree it can be difficult. I put that black square on my Instagram when everyone else did. Had a black friend explain to me why black people don’t like it, so took it down. But then got asked by others why I hadn’t done it. Really want to help but not sure what is best to do. Influencers are in a difficult position like you say, if they say anything at all people say it’s performative and if they don’t say anything people criticise that too. The dream post though was ridiculous and in bad taste IMO.

 

[QueenBW]

What do you propose white people do though? They will never be black, they will never completely understand. Education is an ongoing process and people get things wrong, is it better to stay quiet? I don’t think people can win in this situation. If you stay quiet or speak up. How do you ‘do better’ and avoid mistakes In a process of education?
I’m not being rhetorical, I’m genuinely asking

I think that as white people it is our duty to educate ourselves on racism and white supremacy without seeking kudos or praise for doing it, because it is truly the bare minimum we should be doing. What was Tanya's goal with the post? It wasn't educational. She wasn't sharing resources, books, movies, podcasts. She wasn't shining the spotlight on a Black person's platform or raising their voice. She was all ME ME ME ME. It was performative anti-racism, virtue signalling "oh, see how good I am? Even in my dreams I'm a good person!"

IMHO, the way to "do better" is to do the work, quietly, without advertising how good we are doing in search of applause for having basic human decency and if you do want to share something, ask yourself what the goal of that post is, why is it good to share it? Are you sharing a campaign? Ok, go ahead. Is it a great book? Post it! Is about your own outrage and how unbelievable you find racism and how your bleeding heart aches? Save it, because Black people themselves have said they find it exhausting to be dealing with our "OMG I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS HAPPENS" bursts since they just show our privileged little selves for what we are.

Also, we need to avoid the white savior trope like the plague, which Tanya also had in her dream. SHE was standing up for Black people even in front of a Black person!!! Give this girl an OBE already, please...

 

[Tea&Toast]

sorry just to add my two cents on the racism discussion. i don't think we should ever defend a white person for 'trying their best' - we live in a institutionally racist world and their best just isn't good enough. if she had learnt anything throughout this time then she'd realise how bad that dream post was. as someone said her speaking was more important than the person's lived experience AND IT WAS PERFORMATIVE EVEN IN HER DREAM, AND THEN SHE POSTED TO EVERYONE ON HER INSTAGRAM THAT SHE DREAMS ABOUT TRYING TO BE BETTER. duck YOU TANYA DO BETTER.
I'm sick of white people getting away with everything cause 'they don't know enough' - they live in a system that (especially her) constantly benefits and profits off of the backs of black people. she's had plenty of time to educate herself. she was posting about BLM two months ago!!!!!!!!!

I think that as white people it is our duty to educate ourselves on racism and white supremacy without seeking kudos or praise for doing it, because it is truly the bare minimum we should be doing. What was Tanya's goal with the post? It wasn't educational. She wasn't sharing resources, books, movies, podcasts. She wasn't shining the spotlight on a Black person's platform or raising their voice. She was all ME ME ME ME. It was performative anti-racism, virtue signalling "oh, see how good I am? Even in my dreams I'm a good person!"

IMHO, the way to "do better" is to do the work, quietly, without advertising how good we are doing in search of applause for having basic human decency and if you do want to share something, ask yourself what the goal of that post is, why is it good to share it? Are you sharing a campaign? Ok, go ahead. Is it a great book? Post it! Is about your own outrage and how unbelievable you find racism and how your bleeding heart aches? Save it, because Black people themselves have said they find it exhausting to be dealing with our "OMG I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS HAPPENS" bursts since they just show our privileged little selves for what we are.

Also, we need to avoid the white savior trope like the plague, which Tanya also had in her dream. SHE was standing up for Black people even in front of a Black person!!! Give this girl an OBE already, please...

You’ve both hit the nail on the head, it’s virtue signalling and white knighting, yes anything’s better than nothing, but don’t take credit for it or expect a round of applause. It’s not hard to educate yourself, no one has any excuse nowadays to be ignorant we have the internet, Netflix, there’s been some great documentaries on Freeview these last couple of months, if you’re really interested you will do the research and educate yourself and others.

Of course the me me me thing is narcissistic, they always try and take credit for doing nothing. Tanya has always been a copy cat and I think this has more to do with impressing Scarlett and trying to copy what she does.

 

[Rockin' Robin]

This seems like the most appropiate place to discuss an incident that happened to me at a bus station today.
I was not in the best of moods, because of some volunteering in a charity shop today. I won't bore you with the details, I just wanted to go home afterwards and chill out. I sat on one of the benches, many of the seats had ticks and crosses on them, you don't need me to explain why...
All of a sudden, a white man came over (I'm also white), and sat in a seat marked with a cross. There was just something about this bloke that I didn't like, so I moved severeal rows of seats away from him. My bus finally arrived, so I joined the queue to board the bus. The same man appeared behind me, without warning he knelt on the ground in the taking the knee gesture. It was completely out of the blue.
I boarded the bus, and hoped this man would not come anywhere near me. He came towards me, and sat in the seat in front of me. I immediately got up, and climbed to the upper deck of the bus. Unfortunately I had heard him tell the driver, that he was going to the same destination as me. He got off a stop before me. I felt so anxious, that I took a taxi back to my partner's place. I did not want to bump into this man again.
The experience has left me feeling a little violated. Why did this person make that gesture in a public place, where everyone is minding their own business? There was no reason for it.
We had the chance to make the our society a better, more compassionate place to live, in the wake of the pandemic. Instead certain factions have set equality and harmony back decades.

 

[monga]

sorry just to add my two cents on the racism discussion. i don't think we should ever defend a white person for 'trying their best' - we live in a institutionally racist world and their best just isn't good enough. if she had learnt anything throughout this time then she'd realise how bad that dream post was. as someone said her speaking was more important than the person's lived experience AND IT WAS PERFORMATIVE EVEN IN HER DREAM, AND THEN SHE POSTED TO EVERYONE ON HER INSTAGRAM THAT SHE DREAMS ABOUT TRYING TO BE BETTER. duck YOU TANYA DO BETTER.
I'm sick of white people getting away with everything cause 'they don't know enough' - they live in a system that (especially her) constantly benefits and profits off of the backs of black people. she's had plenty of time to educate herself. she was posting about BLM two months ago!!!!!!!!!

I'm not racist in any shape ,form nor fashion.. but if someone brands me as one because of the colour of my skin ,then that makes me a victim also..

 

[Book]

I agree entirely with this. Although a completely and utterly different ball game entirely from insta-wankers the reports into the Rotherham grooming gangs (and Rochdale etc) looked at why no one shone a light onto the perpetrators earlier although they knew who they were and in many cases differing authorities were frightened to highlight who the perpetrators were because of their race and the backlash that would cause. They should have been called out on it right from the get go but they were allowed to get away with grooming and raping 1400 girls for many reasons including because no-one dared to shine a spotlight on the actions of a group of men from a particular race.
Anyway, back to the SODs!

Exactly this, and appears lessons have not been learned. Eg sweat shop factories in Leicester

 

[Mamacita]

This seems like the most appropiate place to discuss an incident that happened to me at a bus station today.
I was not in the best of moods, because of some volunteering in a charity shop today. I won't bore you with the details, I just wanted to go home afterwards and chill out. I sat on one of the benches, many of the seats had ticks and crosses on them, you don't need me to explain why...
All of a sudden, a white man came over (I'm also white), and sat in a seat marked with a cross. There was just something about this bloke that I didn't like, so I moved severeal rows of seats away from him. My bus finally arrived, so I joined the queue to board the bus. The same man appeared behind me, without warning he knelt on the ground in the taking the knee gesture. It was completely out of the blue.
I boarded the bus, and hoped this man would not come anywhere near me. He came towards me, and sat in the seat in front of me. I immediately got up, and climbed to the upper deck of the bus. Unfortunately I had heard him tell the driver, that he was going to the same destination as me. He got off a stop before me. I felt so anxious, that I took a taxi back to my partner's place. I did not want to bump into this man again.
The experience has left me feeling a little violated. Why did this person make that gesture in a public place, where everyone is minding their own business? There was no reason for it.
We had the chance to make the our society a better, more compassionate place to live, in the wake of the pandemic. Instead certain factions have set equality and harmony back decades.

Weird situation but not sure what it has to do with racism?

 

[littlepup]

Weird situation but not sure what it has to do with racism?

Exactly. This is just a typical example of someone either intimidating for their own amusement or with a mental health issue

 

[Thechubbymoaner]

I don't know if this is the place for this or what but it's the closest place maybe to discuss this. So, this incident happened years ago, a chap who worked where I did, he's not of British descent but born and bred in the UK. Anyway, at a Christmas do a we spent the evening chatting and getting on really well, having a laugh and at one point he's grabbed me and tried to kiss me. I said no sorry I'm not interested I am in a long term relationship and with that he's said no it's not, it's because you are a racist. I was shocked but he was adamant that me turning away his advances was because I'm racist not because I had a boyfriend. Anyway, he left but stayed friends with a few people and I heard he told some colleagues of mine to stay away from me as I'm racist. It came to light one evening when me and the girls from work were having a few drinks at mine that he tried it with them and when they said no he started calling them racists (This guy clearly is a head). Anyway, all along it pans out he was seeing another colleague on the quiet who is of the same heritage as him and they have since married. We have recently found out he's got a job back with us and is returning and we are so upset. He's clearly not a nice person and we feel he's so out of line to call 3 women racist for rejecting his advances. It's also sickening that he's using such a vile thing to accuse us of, he's making a mockery of it. We feel we can't say anything in work as it was years ago and also his wife is lovely and it would break her heart but he's done it before he will do it again and in light of what's happened recently it worries me that a girl will get with him as to not be accused of such a thing. What to do eh?

 

[monga]

I don't know if this is the place for this or what but it's the closest place maybe to discuss this. So, this incident happened years ago, a chap who worked where I did, he's not of British descent but born and bred in the UK. Anyway, at a Christmas do a we spent the evening chatting and getting on really well, having a laugh and at one point he's grabbed me and tried to kiss me. I said no sorry I'm not interested I am in a long term relationship and with that he's said no it's not, it's because you are a racist. I was shocked but he was adamant that me turning away his advances was because I'm racist not because I had a boyfriend. Anyway, he left but stayed friends with a few people and I heard he told some colleagues of mine to stay away from me as I'm racist. It came to light one evening when me and the girls from work were having a few drinks at mine that he tried it with them and when they said no he started calling them racists (This guy clearly is a head). Anyway, all along it pans out he was seeing another colleague on the quiet who is of the same heritage as him and they have since married. We have recently found out he's got a job back with us and is returning and we are so upset. He's clearly not a nice person and we feel he's so out of line to call 3 women racist for rejecting his advances. It's also sickening that he's using such a vile thing to accuse us of, he's making a mockery of it. We feel we can't say anything in work as it was years ago and also his wife is lovely and it would break her heart but he's done it before he will do it again and in light of what's happened recently it worries me that a girl will get with him as to not be accused of such a thing. What to do eh?

Tell him to FO if he tries it again. I'm sure sexual harassment is not tolerated no matter what colour of skin he may have..

 

[Thechubbymoaner]

Tell him to FO if he tries it again. I'm sure sexual harassment is not tolerated no matter what colour of skin he may have..

It is sexual harassment isn't it? And accusing us of racism is keeping us quiet

 

[monga]

It is sexual harassment isn't it? And accusing us of racism is keeping us quiet

It's definitely sexual harassment if someone's making unwanted advances ,veering into blackmail if he's using the racism card to try and silence you ..You need to complain to management if it starts up again ,that's not on ..

 

[Thechubbymoaner]

It's definitely sexual harassment if someone's making unwanted advances ,veering into blackmail if he's using the racism card to try and silence you ..You need to complain to management if it starts up again ,that's not on ..

Thank you so much. I've/we've been so depressed since we found our he's coming back

 

[monga]

Thank you so much. I've/we've been so depressed since we found our he's coming back

It's unfortunate for his wife but he's obviously a pest ,you do right to complain if he's overstepping the mark..

 

[Thechubbymoaner]

It's unfortunate for his wife but he's obviously a pest ,you do right to complain if he's overstepping the mark..

I think that's the problem, she's such a lovely lady, she's beautiful too, Lord knows what he would have wanted with us lol

 

[monga]

I think that's the problem, she's such a lovely lady, she's beautiful too, Lord knows what he would have wanted with us lol

He must be a narcissistic control freak thinks he can take whatever he wants ,when he wants . God knows what goes on between him and the wife ....But still it doesn't mean he should be forcing himself on people and making them uncomfortable ,he seems like a right bully call his bluff and tell him in no uncertain terms you'll be taking it further and the courts will decide if he keeps it up ..

 

[Thechubbymoaner]

He must be a narcissistic control freak thinks he can take whatever he wants ,when he wants . God knows what goes on between him and the wife ....But still it doesn't mean he should be forcing himself on people and making them uncomfortable ,he seems like a right bully call his bluff and tell him in no uncertain terms you'll be taking it further and the courts will decide if he keeps it up ..

He certainly is that! Part of me feels sad for him as he did admit on another occasion that he was racially bullied growing up but at the same time it doesn't give him a license to do this. Im hopeful he's grown up and that he will behave himself. Gives me the creeps. Xxx

 

[monga]

He certainly is that! Part of me feels sad for him as he did admit on another occasion that he was racially bullied growing up but at the same time it doesn't give him a license to do this. Im hopeful he's grown up and that he will behave himself. Gives me the creeps. Xxx

well you said it ..creep..There's a sexual element to this and he seems pretty confident for someone that was bullied ,so I don't see why being bullied because of his colour would impact his behaviour it's just a lame excuse to gain sympathy. Hopefully he'll won't bother any of you again if he does come back, but if he does deff put in a complaint about him x