Pregnancy #47

[justonemorepage]

Congratulations to those who have had their babies recently, congratulations to the twin mama and good luck to those waiting to go into labour! Very exciting times for everyone!

Just wanted to ask if anyone's symptoms changed during the first trimester? I've gone from feeling nauseous, dizzy and exhausted to having dry mouth to the point nothing will quench my thirst, still exhausted but having small bursts of energy throughout the day and when I'm asleep my legs go numb just wondering if any of this is normal. I've got my 12 week scan in two weeks and I can't wait. Seems to be dragging so much!

 

[Pontiac_Bandit]

I can’t imagine treating anyone let alone a heavily pregnant woman in such a condescending manner when it’s a genuine concern about a babies life.
She said “I can’t tell you over the phone what it is” so I replied “yes I know, that’s why I’m calling as I want it checked” at first I thought it was a receptionist but when we got there the same person introduced herself as the midwife.

Thank GOD she didn’t do my speculum check I think I would’ve asked for someone else.
She made me take my knickers & pad off in front of her to then say “your pad is dry” - it wasn’t but my leaking is never at the back always at the top of the pad weirdly, even with periods. Followed by “all doctors are in surgery right now so you’ll be waiting a long time” which was a fat lie as a doctor came in 5mins later to explain what she would do/give me time to get undressed in private & was really reassuring.
Already told my partner if she’s put with me when I go into labour we will be asking for a different one.
I’m tempted to contact the hospital about it because that rudeness and rolling of eyes is so dangerous in midwifery.
Was everything ok with your two in the end?? How scary for you!! It’s such a horrible feeling not being believed.
Same here! I just end up crying down the phone but then sometimes my OH will let them fob him off so maybe not

That's so awful - if you've got the energy to then I'd recommend making a complaint because it isn't just her dangerous wrong advice, it's the way she treated you without respect or dignity! Well done for standing your ground and doing what was best for you and baby - I can't believe you had to fight to get checked though when it's always drummed into us to call up and be seen if we're worried!

 

[Nosysamsie]

I am dreading what my in laws are going to be like when I'm in labour. I'm getting a real sense of entitlement from them already.

I just want it to be me and my partner there as I'll have enough on my plate without having to make conversation with anyone else. But I just know they'll be constantly wanting updates and tbh he can deal with that, I'm going to be busy

They're already complaining about how often they will get to see her, when my family will hardly see her at all due to location. I wish they'd think before they complain about not having their grandchild on their doorstep

This is my worry. My MIL has already been giving all the reasons she needs to come round. So I can have a bath, so I can get housework done, so I have some company. I've had to say 'I need to learn to be on my own with my child' and me and your son will be absolutely fine I am sure.
Worst bit is it sounds like the in-laws is gonna come round and sit there expecting to hold a baby whilst I run around after them (they never come alone!).
My hubby is the youngest son, so I don't think she sees him as the grown up he is. And we've never been given free reign around our niece and nephew on that side so they've never seen how he is with kids (which is amazing because our niece and nephew from my side adore him and he cares so deeply for them), so they think he won't be any help. Sounds like his dad wasn't very involved in caring for a baby when he was growing up too, he recently admitted that he never changed a nappy .
I get it's exciting to have a grandchild coming into the world, gosh I was a nightmare sitting waiting for my sister to get in touch when she was pregnant with both my niece and nephew, but I am sick of people making it about their wishes and their requirements now.

 

[Pontiac_Bandit]

If anyone fancies a little giggle at my expense - last night I proved that pregnancy hormones which cause increased general flexibility are definitely a thing. There was an unfortunate combination of my mother-in-law cleaning our laminate floor earlier in the day, and me having a little dance around to encourage baby to shift down last night, which lead to me accidently doing a very impressive attempt at the splits I did a sort of slow-motion slide as my legs got wider and wider apart, ending in me being on the floor looking shocked (and feeling very sore!) due to my new-found gymnastic ability

 

[shhh1712]

As above there isn’t much you can do as you are already there but luckily you are coming home tomorrow so I would just keep your midwife apt as planned and see what they say and go from there, hopefully everything will be ok for you! try not to stress too much until you’ve got some proper guidance x
---
Due date today, have a stack of messages I’m ignoring on WhatsApp from people asking ‘any update’ 🫠 overwhelmed already

 

[Naataaliiee]

I’m due a week today and determined for labour to happen naturally after a long induction first time around! Good luck to everyone due around this time. There seems to be lots of us!!

 

[Pontiac_Bandit]

It was my last day of work today before maternity leave, I've been so exhausted and so ready to be finished, but then as I was writing my final email I started feeling all emotional and nostalgic, and once I'd pressed send I burst into tears I think it was a combination of relief, exhaustion, hormones and saying goodbye (temporarily!) to a job I've been in for 14 years! I can't quite get my head around the fact that all the time up until baby's born is mine now, although obviously I'll be very busy finishing getting everything ready! I can't wait to take it easier and nap when I want to I'm 36+3 so I'm hoping he doesn't appear too early and lets me get everything done!

 

[TheSilverFox]

I’m 37+5 today and keep getting a weird pain in my stomach but it’s quite sharp rather than like what I imagine contractions feel like. (Plus tmi sorry and can’t stop going number two). Honestly I’m hoping he’s coming im so done lol

Might be! It crossed my mind when I was going to the loo loads that it might be a sign of labour, but then I ignored it less than 12 hours later there was a baby in my arms!! I had so many braxton hicks the second time around I kept thinking I was in labour every other day for about 3 weeks though

I'm only 30 weeks now and already starting to feel a bit impatient!!

 

[Pontiac_Bandit]

Still here and still pregnant! 40+2. I have a check tomorrow and I’m still debating whether or not to have a sweep. Sigh!

I feel your pain (41+1)!! I had an attempted sweep last week, and an actual sweep yesterday, so if I can be of any help in making a decision let me know!

I had my final growth scan today and baby is measuring 8lb 15oz...R.I.P. to my vagina

 

[justonemorepage]

I'm only 7 weeks but the fatigue I'm feeling is unreal I've always suffered with tiredness but this is next level. I feel like I could fall asleep most days at work, I get super dizzy and as soon as I get home I have zero energy to do anything else. Weekends are pretty much a right off as I need to try to recoup as much energy as possible to get back into work on the Monday. I feel awful because family and friends ask me to do stuff with them but I genuinely don't have the energy to get out of the house most days. Is this normal? And will it get better by the 2nd trimester? I've started panicking thinking I'm not cut out for motherhood because if I'm this exhausted now how will I manage when baby is actually here sorry for the long rant, I'm just freaking out that something is wrong with me I do have low iron which I have tablets for that make me really ill so the doctor has told me to cut back on the prescribed dose. I feel like I may have low blood pressure or something and I get breathless from simple chores around the house. My BMI is in the normal range and my midwife has no concerns and has put me as low risk so maybe I'm worrying unnecessarily.

 

[LilyRose1234]

I think I’m in the minority haha, after my first we dropped by my in laws on the way back from the hospital to show her off, and then had a steady stream of visitors in the days afterwards, and I loved having all our closes friends and family over to visit, BUT all our visitors were respectful, didn’t overstay their welcome, helped out by making food/walking the dog/putting the washing on etc, and didn’t just sit down for cuddles and expect to be waited on, and despite having a second degree tear my birth was relatively straightforward. I can imagine if anyone of those things was different I’d have felt slightly different!!!

 

[Hinchhater1442]

My plan is to not let anyone know either. Even if I end up booked for a caesarean or an induction, I won’t be admitting to that or telling anyone the date. I will let parents know once baby has arrived, but only after we’ve had a bit of time together as a family - if it’s straight forward enough that I can go home the same day then I won’t be letting anyone know until we are home. If I have to stay in then parents can know and visit the hospital depending on how I’m feeling!
This is something I feel super strongly about about the moment, so it might all change when I’m in pain and want my mum

 

[Pontiac_Bandit]

Random one ladies .. but has anyone had an issue with their mother absolutely kicking off because they haven’t been asked to be at the birth.. apparently “every daughter has their mother” and I’ve been made to feel super guilty… I don’t know if I’m in the wrong or not

I think a lot of people don't have their mothers there at the birth! If you don't want her there then please don't feel guilted into it - it's your right to have whoever will support you best and for most women that's their partner! Perhaps in your mum's day it was more common for the grandmother to be at the birth? You could try gently explaining that things have changed, and you'll just be having whoever you've chosen as your birth partner - and if she's still kicking off/guilting you, you can firmly point out that it's your baby and your choice, and that her being like that is unhelpful and insensitive!

 

[Ro98]

33-38 now seems crazy when I first commented at 4/5 weeks. Had 2 dreams I went into labour last night & all I could think was “we need to order the baby car seat”
Hope the ladies going for early scans get good news / reassurance

 

[WeHadFunRight]

Am I being silly not wanting to venture too far away from the hospital I'm due to give birth in at 38 weeks?
My in laws are having an Easter party next week & want us to go, but it's an hour away on a good day from the hospital but half the journey has no phone signal because its over the moors.
Feel bad saying no, but again feel unreasonable because my family are 10 mins from the hospital so I visit them still.
I mean we'd take the bags and car with us and make sure my notes are in the car, but to me it still seems quite a distance

You’re not being silly, it’s just about making yourself feel safe and comfortable. My parents are 1.5hrs away and my dad stopped me coming down about a month or so before I was due as he said there was no point risking it. If they’re reasonable they should understand.

have just read the bit about no signal and moors - I am totally with you, don’t go. There’ll be other parties! Maybe they could visit you in the meantime if you’re not able to travel?

 

[Tifastrife]

Does your partner definitely have to leave? My local hospital trust tells partners to bring a pillow so they can try to make themselves comfy in a chair at night, although maybe that's just during labour itself? It'd be worth asking in case he's allowed to stay over

I was told today he could stay until 9pm! It feels like such a silly thing to be stressing about hut every time I picture him leaving I burst into tears lol

 

[Nosysamsie]

Just dawned on me this is my last weekend ever before becoming a mum. I’m spending the time well… binging the sims

Same realisation here. Finally home but I've got my induction booked now & they did a sweep & I'm 2cm dilated so could be sooner. My weekend will probably include playing call of duty with the hubby & napping - living the high life

 

[WeHadFunRight]

thanks for this, I think when I feel up to it I’ll definitely contact them and arrange something. I think my hormones have got the better of me as spent the day crying. My legs have been getting better at least though. Baby muffin was worth it all I’m just wondering how I can process it all as I never likes needles or blood at the best of times and I’ve just spent the last week being poked and prodded.

I cried a lot after my first (very similar story but not with the follow up repercussions you’ve had), I felt like I’d been hit by a truck. You’ve been through a genuine ORDEAL. It is probably a mix of hormones and shock. Do you have a decent support network? My only recommendation is get as much support as you can and if necessary buy it in if you can afford it. Both me and my husband were shell shocked for weeks and we didn’t have anyone. It’s really hard going but sending you lots of love and hope you’re more mobile very soon.

 

[Pontiac_Bandit]

First was to check the cervix then no idea on the other 2. Think that’s why I got so emotional & said I’m done with induction

It's absolutely your right to refuse examination at any point, and it's definitely your right to ask what they're examining you for before you give your consent - three in half an hour sounds ridiculously excessive and uncomfortable, no wonder you were so fed up!! Hopefully after a good rest tonight you'll feel better for when the consultant visits tomorrow, and then once they've given you your options you can make a decision that feels right for you and can ask for clarification about everything they plan to do so you know if you feel comfortable with it or not

 

[Rdogk24]

Had a speculum exam and it’s definitely not my waters but now I’m in burning pain
Just want my baby here now !! can definitely see myself going past my due date now.