One Day of Winter #3 Queen Raven still ruling the roost.... even the Pea has reproduced.

[maytoseptember]

Why is P teaching R the parts of a flower, other than to grandstand about what a genius R is, and what an amazing mother P is? It’s just pointless.

She’s 3.5. She isn’t interested in that shit and she won’t remember it.

 

[FraggleRock]

Looking at her post last night, it really does feel like they had Ember ‘for the sake of it’ if everyone gets what I mean, she does t seem to have the same feelings towards ‘the baby’ as she did/does with Raven. If R is her everything and she can’t open herself up to another child, I really don’t understand why she had Ember to be honest, it just feels like she’s a bit of an inconvenience thus far, and an interference in Peas precious relationship with Raven. Makes me so sad! I really do hope that things get better, and she realises how precious Ember is.

 

[maytoseptember]

By labelling her parenting style and trying to define every single aspect of her parenting choice, she has boxed herself into a situation that she cannot get out of because she has not allowed herself the flexibility that comes with actually raising a child(ren).

Exactly! She’s so desperate to nail gentle parenting, to nail attachment parenting, to do “natural term” breastfeeding and now she’s fucked. She now feels like she can’t backtrack because it’s central to her identity. It’s in her Instagram bio FFS.

“I wish I’d reduced Raven’s breastfeeding to bedtime only” - you still can!

“The baby wakes up Raven when she cries at night” - NO SHIT.

The picture she’s painted of sitting there in the wee small hours, knackered and with two kids hanging off her nipples... it makes me want to cry. She thought she’d be able to brag about tandem feeding. “It just works for our family!”

 

[BethanyGilbert]

A picture of Ember and she puts a heart around R in the background.

 

[Peanut0205]

She definitely reads this, its so frustrating because I genuinely don’t wish her any ill will but she makes things so hard for herself. It’s hard to see someone so obviously struggling because of their own pride, I don’t agree with her parenting choices but it’s clear to see she loves being a parent, it’s just sad to see she values her parenting ideals over the physical impracticalities they place upon her. I’m such a black and white person (which doesn’t always do me favours) but I just don’t understand how her mind doesn’t work the way of problem=solution.

Tandem feeding isn’t working - Stop it
Raven drinks milk before Ember - Express into a cup for her..
No one is getting any sleep - Separate the children so they’re both rested for their own development
She never gets a minute to herself - accept the help offered to you!

I just don’t get it.

 

[TheLastLolo]

For me, the problem with the sling comes when she doesn't need to have it on. She's in it aalllll day by the looks of things, she never properly holds her baby through choice. It's like she doesn't want to touch her (I know this sounds mental cos she's literally strapped to her body....). Like I said earlier, she was sat watching TV. She needed her hands free for what? Oh yeah, to film Ember's head wobbling about unsupported. Is it just me or did everyone else 'properly' hold their babies at every opportunity, meaning with their actual arms? She can't even see Ember properly. I couldn't stop staring at my baby. And they're only tiny for a short time, it's like she can't wait to get it over with so she's strapping her on, getting on with the rest of her life and waiting this stage of her life out...

Or maybe I'm mental? Lol

 

[TheLastLolo]

I would punch her straight in the face if I was loosing the will to live with kid and then she came up to me with paper for a book. Fuck right off.

GENTLE PARENT THIS *SMACK*

 

[TheLastLolo]

Why the hell would you only have one cot sheet?

Also, she can have a support/childcare bubble right now. Get Dean to drop the laundry off with her mum, fuck the hoover, make do with a bath and a jug for hair washing. Come on woman, how are these things breaking you but never sleeping and having Raven (in general) doesn't?

 

[missmarmighty]

I feel like they’re real little people at this age. I tend to my Children’s needs perfectly fine without all of this rubbish. I feel like this whole ‘gentle’ parenting thing is more of a ‘how can I make parenting difficult?’ I have a beautiful relationship with my children. They’re clean, fed, happy, playful and sociable. I could not put them to bed in the clothes from the day either. Even if we have a ‘PJ day’ I switch their pyjamas at bedtime again.

 

[TheLastLolo]

The comments on it make me sick. Not one person has an issue with any of it, someone even went as far as to say that they are both doing so well, her and Raven. EMBER IS A BABY, not a rabid dog. Jesus, it's like she's a danger to them and their relationship and they're being praised for 'handling' her.

 

[AfroCircus]

Her videos of Ember feeding this morning are making me all nostalgic for my when my son was a breastfeeding newborn. Very sweet but I wouldn't post on a public account. There was a controversy in a big Facebook BF group recently where admins were being paid money to let creepy men into the group (allegedly!).

 

[TheLastLolo]

Don't mind me, just giggling away at 'does Pea eat food she has to chew?' and calling Raven Damien

 

[CelinaRoger]

Is must be trolling us surely? Wrapping a baby up in a fleece blanket in their moses basket? Should someone message her the lullaby trust website?

Shes got to be just winding us up, even the biscuit post about not saying no to raven this morning

Its obviously horrific that winter died, but people cant come on here moaning about us making her worry about losing a child, if she doesnt want to worry, she shouldn't be doing unsafe stuff

 

[barrrlohflaughs]

The amount of posts I see on the gentle parenting FB page about small children needing fillings or teeth removing is unreal!

 

[DiscoBiscuit]

Get that baby off the table, get that bucket of water off the carpet, and get that kid sat properly in a chair!

And parts of a flower? For a 3 year old? Fuck off Pea.

 

[Booboothefool]

Two recent Insta likes - a post offended by a bottle brand talking about BF (because God forbid a baby have a bottle?)

Did she not say she was considering expressing a bottle for Ember so grandma or Dean could feed her now and then? Where exactly does she think that milk will be fed from? An organic wooden bottle made by trees that were planted by gentle mothers?!

 

[EmilyChambers]

My little boy is always talking about a boy in his nursery who snatches. He keeps saying "we don't like *** as he snatches the toys. We don't play with him he's naughty". He said it consistently for months and he loves all the other kids in there so this boy must be bad!

I had a child at nursery with behavioural issues and they were being dealt with, however if something happened in the room or if we said stop hitting or don't break our toys, the children would all pipe up and say "Graham did it" even when the poor lad wasn't in. He left and went to reception and the children still said it!

That reputation is hard to shift so Raven is going to be an absolute delight as she gets older.

I live in Derby, not far from Pea and I know exactly where she lives - I’ve looked up how much the houses on that estate sold for and it’s on average around £240,000 so not on the cheap side, but I think that’s average for Derby, I wonder whether they got help towards their deposit as they were renting for years before, and it’s difficult to save for a deposit whilst renting.

Im really curious, how did you end up coming across her thread? You said you were a lurker, but your profile says you only just joined today - are other people who know her aware of her thread on here at all?!

Nicola said on one of her stories that she loves living in the country side, how rural is she?

 

[justfortonight]

Didn’t see this shared on last thread, but apologies if I missed it.
So even before Ember was born she was planning on focusing her time, effort and breasts on Queen Raven!!

Wow. I remember 5 or more essays of hers declaring ‘I won’t leave my daughter unless I absolutely have to’ ‘I won’t apologise for not wanting to be away from Raven’ etc... she’d never have given Raven a bottle.

Also - the word nurseling makes my teeth itch.

 

[Cubalibra]

She has a morning routine but doesnt let her child have a bedtime routine?

 

[Booboothefool]

It really does come across that Raven is the holy grail who came at the right time (P's words) and helped ease the pain etc. Then with Ember it's "well I guess we will have another child and give Raven the gift of a sister".
I want to understand being a loss mum myself but I just can't. My heart hurts for poor Ember, she's as much a blessing as Raven and she deserves to be her own person and P's world without having all this guilt and angst put onto her.
Can you imagine if she was to read her mothers posts in the future? It would break my heart personally.