Niomi Smart #53 Still missing JoeJoe, now selling a Dildo

[curiouscat106]

3 of my closest friends are GPs and there is absolutely NO WAY they would randomly prescribe the contraceptive pill to a girl “because she is 16” and who came in to discuss another issue. If she attended an appointment relating to anything other then sexual health advice they would explain that the appointment is limited to the presenting problem (E.g. the “cold”) and should she want to discuss methods of contraception she would have to make a second appointment dedicated to this where all options could be discussed and she could make an informed choice about which method felt most suitable.
Nims, DO NOT spout your BS against educated, trained and regulated medical professionals you vacuous airhead.

 

[Shutterbug99]

I assume you didn’t mean to say that having an Irish accent equals lack of class that cannot by compensated for by a private education.

There are some very very problematic comments being casually thrown around about Irish people. As if somehow it’s reasonable to assume that having an Irish accent is problematic, worse it’s seems than being a chavtastic personal traine

There are many valid reasons Niomi’s mother might not like Jamie. To jump to oh it must be because he is a Irish/ has an Irish accent is bizarre.

I agree - totally bizarre! I was pretty surprised earlier when I read posts stating that Niomi's family might have a problem with Lordon because he's Irish. WTH?! The guy is problematic for a whole number of reasons - being Irish is not one of them!

If anything, I think Verity is probably concerned about the speed at which their relationship is moving. She won't want Niomi to get hurt again. She may also be concerned with Lordon's chosen career of 'online life coach.' I'd guess that's not exactly what she wants for her daughter who almost married Joe Woodward.

 

[Shutterbug99]

oh wait, what happened there? :O

Her grandfather died while she was in Bali and she didn't bother to return for the funeral. Not only that, a few days after he died, she posted stories on a beach in Bali where she said she was the happiest she'd ever been. So weird. Now, instead of spending Christmas with her family, which I'm sure her mum would appreciate, since it's her first Christmas without her dad, she's taking off to Dublin to spend it with Lordon's family instead. Anything to get that ring, huh? She's so selfish!

 

[Thankyouforthemusic]

Charlotte liked his latest insta post

 

[QueenBW]

SHE DARED View attachment 1799580

Still not on the grid, though. She knows everyone will know she's desperate once she puts him on the grid.

ETA: why does it look like he has more teeth than the average human? It's not just size, it looks as if there were more of them. Oy vey.

 

[Gardensnail]

I still feel the weirdest and most misguided stuff we do as humans, is be really extra, and show off a new person post-breakup to prove to the dumper that we're actually great and ok and doing so well, and 'just look at me!'

It's the biggest fallacy, and the most pointless exercise because never, ever has it worked at 'winning' someone back. Or making them jealous. They're not interested. They're not even curious. The few times I've been the dumper, I can say I honestly didn't even think to check my exes socials. Not in a bad way, it just didn't occur to me. I'd moved on way before the dumping, which is sadly the truth of most break ups.

All this performative weirdness Nimboid is doing, and all this abandoning of her family and friends, is for Joe who not only doesn't care anymore, but wouldn't even think for a second about checking in on her life. Which has gone so flipping weird, that even if he did, it would have the opposite effect I imagine.

The only time I've ever had someone come crawling back (only to dump me again because that's the only usual outcome), was when I went totally silent on socials, and silent on any text contact with my ex, because I was in pieces and social media was the last thing on my mind.

 

[ieatboys]

Did she erase all of 2022 Q1 from her memory? In January 2022 she was still dating Forky and they went to Mauritius in February. She didn't go to Bali until around her birthday! I feel like I'm going crazy reading this. It also shows how fake she is. Last year she was talking about how she's the happiest she's ever been, and then she reveals that she was in a bad place and she's ashamed to even speak about it (also shitty messaging right there! reads like 'my mental health was bad and that's shameful and embarrassing ew!!). It's like when she said the shed felt like home only to move out and say it never felt right. Everything she says is contradicted months later. Now Lordon is isolating her from her family and friends. First Charlotte and now she's ditching her family for Christmas and then buggering off to Bali again. Her entire self-worth is tied to being in a relationship. She's only worthy if a man deems her so. It's scary watching this spiral happen in real time.

And after her breakup with Lordon she will go on and on about how she got caught in a toxic mindset & toxic relationship and was tweaking her whole life around this dude, losing friends and distancing from family along the way, once again playing fairytale. IF she even smart enough to actually realize all of that later. Or she will just blame him for bamboozling her all this time lol

Forky’s ego must be in flames right now, I bet Niomi was banging on to him about how happy she is, this is a new chapter, friendship is the best foundation! Lmfaooo this is gold

 

[irvinelane]

Oh too late for me to receive this sh*t before Christmas. Bugger!

My gosh, can she be more obsessed with herself?

Actually, it would be: people’s faces receiving MySh*tSkin this Christmas 🤍

 

[Sammie00]

I don't think being Irish is problematic, but I can totally see that Niomi's family might due to rather unpleasant British class bias (they aren't upper class but they enjoy a sort of grotesque cosplay). It's evident that Niomi thinks being Irish is all about potatoes and booze.

Stating that systemic bias exists isn't problematic in and of itself. The snobbery in certain parts of England is something else; it's not enough to be white and to have money. English nationalism is nasty.

I can’t understand how anyone would employ a life coach who ran a night club event where you exchanged your knickers for a drink

 

[coriander]

 

[LolitaBlah]

In that pic, he looks like someone shoved Grandma's dentures into Joe

Hmmm maybe yes! I can see a hint of Joe in him..

Yes a hint, just a hint!

 

[Nitfey]

Oooh love you too Tattlers ! You are the light that keeps on shinning in this shish world merry Christmas and happy new year ! You are my flamingo to my pose, the beige to my coat, my everyday gorgeous avocado, my beaudiful non #sponsored gift of them all ! Happy Iberian ham appetizers hoping for us all that the duvet coat and the lord of teeth part ways, become friends that communicate frequently!

But on a serious note, you deserve all the best in this world! Hope your deepest dreams come true

 

[Jackie Daytona]

If I were an influencer I would never hold up a white sign, it’s just begging to be photoshopped.

 

[BWGossip]

Why does she talk about Donkey like they have been together forever? You'd think they have been together for years or that they are already engaged/married. Dude relax, I've a longer relationship with some mustard in my fridge

No matter what happens with Lordon, she will have a complete meltdown when shit hits the fan. Would be kinda funny if he breaks up with her after their engagement, a real Joe 2.0 (I'm a bitch, sorry ).

 

[CallItAsItIs]

Is that his actual version of ‘cleaning up’? He still looks scruffy asf.

 

[Shutterbug99]

Haha!

Looks like Nims new bestie, Rosanna, is a fan of creepy 'J'.

 

[curiouscat106]

I can’t believe she’s showing off all the stuff she’s been sent, laying it all out to display. Tacky, tone deaf, crass and cringe.

 

[Gardensnail]

I'm now more concerned for the decent folks she's kicked to the curb in the last six months. What a brat. The masks are off, the narcissism has won. Who knew the descent would be so awkward and public! I'm sure 2016 Dimbob would never have let her true, selfish self shine through like this. In a way, perhaps we should be grateful lol!

If she ends up friendless and in a mess after this, so be it. Not spending xmas with her mum after her grandpa's death is next level shittery. It's not like she's in a long term marriage and has the moral quandary of alternating family and in-laws every year. They've literally only just met.

May her crappy online 'career' dissolve into nothing, and force her to get a normal job.

 

[prive0505]

The lovely 2022 recap on her Insta is rather quiet about a certain piece of cutlery...he won't be happy!

I was just about to say… she’s completely erased forky from her memory. Ouch. Like it never happened SURELY getting lost in the jungle should have been included

she also mentions she was in a really bad place this time last year and was ‘so ashamed’ to talk about it… Another dig at forky… pretty sure she started dating him around Halloween last year and had their romantic getaway to Paris in November

 

[Ciri]

She looks happy. Without Lordon.