Niomi Smart #45 Fourchette la baguette and Donkey in the shed, are they engaged yet?

[bahiaorange]

Hi guys, I had the post about Rohini, but I promoted another forum so it got removed. Here's the edited post:

Have any of you lot heard of the micro-influencer Rohini Elyse?

I used to watch her vlogs when she was living in Seattle with her husband and puppy and made wholesome cooking/home decor vlogs. She was always quite alternative and 'hippy'; into yoga/mediation, was a vegan, spouted toxic positivity, etc but despite this seemed like a lovely person. Well, she attended a Fit for Service 'wellness retreat' held by Aubrey Marcus (who JAMIE reposts on his stories frequently) and within the space of a couple of months became a full-blown cult member. She divorced her husband (whom she had been with since 16), sold all her belongings and moved to Texas to devote her life to it. The evolution was rapid. It's beyond bizarre and sad, truly watching a car crash in slow motion.

It's VERY concerning that Jamie looks up to this guy Aubrey Marcus. Niomi is vulnerable, we've noticed for YEARS how lost she's been since Joe and how she has zero sense of self. She's a relationship chameleon, time and time again molding her personality, or lack thereof, to become whoever she believes her partner wants her to be. She already spouts nonsensical new age rhetoric about sPiRiTuAliTy, it's not a reach to say she is highly likely to jump straight into this bullshit if Jamie is already buying into this lifestyle.

Strap in ladies, I think this thread is about to get weird(er)...

 

[catherinemorland]

Hi guys, I had the post about Rohini, but I promoted another forum so it got removed. Here's the edited post:

Have any of you lot heard of the micro-influencer Rohini Elyse?

I used to watch her vlogs when she was living in Seattle with her husband and puppy and made wholesome cooking/home decor vlogs. She was always quite alternative and 'hippy'; into yoga/mediation, was a vegan, spouted toxic positivity, etc but despite this seemed like a lovely person. Well, she attended a Fit for Service 'wellness retreat' held by Aubrey Marcus (who JAMIE reposts on his stories frequently) and within the space of a couple of months became a full-blown cult member. She divorced her husband (whom she had been with since 16), sold all her belongings and moved to Texas to devote her life to it. The evolution was rapid. It's beyond bizarre and sad, truly watching a car crash in slow motion.

It's VERY concerning that Jamie looks up to this guy Aubrey Marcus. Niomi is vulnerable, we've noticed for YEARS how lost she's been since Joe and how she has zero sense of self. She's a relationship chameleon, time and time again molding her personality, or lack thereof, to become whoever she believes her partner wants her to be. She already spouts nonsensical new age rhetoric about sPiRiTuAliTy, it's not a reach to say she is highly likely to jump straight into this bullshit if Jamie is already buying into this lifestyle.

Strap in ladies, I think this thread is about to get weird(er)...

OMG! I knew I recognised her from somewhere! I totally remember watching her videos and her nice wedding dress. When did this bizarre switch happened?

 

[Hellofish]

This is a like a weird 6 part Netflix documentary in the making...its obviously some cult wellness group that look like they're into free love and questionable leaders....

Who'd have thought engaged Nimbobs would end up HERE the heck!

I stopped watching her just before the engagement ended and have kwpt tabs on this thread and never expected this!

 

[irvinelane]

If things really get bad, and if Niomi ends up hurt and heartbroken again, are we allowed to tell her this? not sure she would agree, though.

Whether she’s happy or miserable, there must be some signs sent by the Universe, right?

 

[curiouscat106]

2 days away, I come on for a quick check in on my lunch break and WOW!

WHAT THE ACTUAL F*CKING F*CK?!

Forky gave me the ick, but Lordon actually invokes a real sense of fear in me. If Nims was a friend of mine I’d be hiding her passport. What on earth is she thinking with this guy?!
After Joe I thought she’ll milk the break up for a year, then start up a yoga studio, run retreats and incorporate it all together in a “healthy wellbeing” vegan type brand. Maybe got Sarah Ann involved on the nutritional side of things… and date some “made in Chelsea” type rah guy who owns his own drinks company.

BUT THIS?! Chasing a guy to Bali and basically joining a cult. I’m not sure how much more of this I can watch. I don’t know Nims and I don’t particularly like her, but watching her go down this path is legit distressing viewing.

 

[coriander]

This is what happens when you get a tit ton of money while not doing an actual job. As "glamorous" as influencer life seems, it's such a shallow and empty existence. When normal things in life lose their meaning, people start to look for other more stimulating experiences and that makes them a very easy target for these cults.

This is spot on.

 

[QueenBW]

It's concerning that she appears to be selling the shed. There are plenty of real life stories on cults and selling your belongings is step one. Like @bahiaorange 's post on Rohini Elyse. And usually the earnings of the sales are put into the cult.

Hopefully we're just being paranoid but Lordon and his pal who likes to take photos like he's Jesus Christ are scary AF. Niomi's always been too dumb and too susceptible to adoration/fawning, but this only became more true since the breakup. She'll do anything for a little male validation.

As always, Niomi. Run to the therapy. RUN.

 

[pipinGO]

That guy Jamie is friends with is so bleeping strange. Have a look at his profile... it turned me off my breakfast. He describes himself as a multi orgasmic man with multiple wives... he also follows Niomi. He's probably recruiting her to be a part of his harem.

Jaimie’s group of ‘friends’ are some of the most disgusting cultural appropriators i’ve seen in a long time. They don’t appreciate a foreign culture. They seem to steal bits and pieces and turn them into a bastardize fetish.
Yuck!

 

[AshMay]

This has got into sinister territory! I'm intrigued how this will play out.

 

[toanna1]

What are niomis friends and family doing ? Don’t we all dig more about a guy a friend or our sister tells about and points out any red flags if we see it ? Cannot believe that none of them is doing that , not only not doing anything to stop her but encouraging her to keep this by posting her n the weird man on Instagram ! He probably went to the birthday party at her house to access the property values!

 

[LolitaBlah]

I wanna make a joke to loosen up the mood but I just can't find anything to joke about tit I can't use this emoji anymore cause it reminds me of OrgyLordy!!

 

[Critchley]

You guys I have just caught up on this thread and I am horrified…
Niomi please just get out of there!!!


Running list of cultish recruitment patterns we’ve seen so far:
1. Jamie/Holly never left her out of sight and followed her to London for the one week where she’d be alone.
2. Jamie was invited to her family home after knowing her for only 3-4 weeks… as @toanna1 stated, possibly to assess property values
3. She’s selling her shed after one trip
4. She was isolated from a normal social structure and was essentially starved (smoothie bowl diet) while in Bali - starvation especially is a common mind control practice in cults.
5. Jamie has previously mentioned (in a podcast, hopefully someone can remember) being £1 million in debt and supposedly the money he’s earned while in Bali “paid it off”… Niomi is a cash cow for sharks like him.

 

[malino_]

Okay I have a wild theory… and it could very well be out to lunch. So here goes. Do we think that Nims could actually be getting married within the month? It wouldn’t surprise me. Or it could be a total coincidence. Here’s why lol:


- She brings back Lordon to her family home within weeks of meeting him
- Sister of Lordon states she’s the matchmaker and the best thing she’s done
- BFF Says she’s wearing “THE ring”
- Nims flies back to Bali weeks after returning to London and barely mentioning it to her followers.
- Nims Grandmother states she’ll miss her to which Nims replies “I’ll miss you too. See you in a month on the boat!” (Pretty far trek for her to travel no?)
- Nims first posts in Bali to her Instagram stories are: Shopping for lingerie & looking for a videographer & photographer. OH and she was recently at an event in London for a company who sells wedding dresses prior to leaving for Bali….

Again could be out to lunch and could very well be a coincidence lol.

 

[LolitaBlah]

... I think we will be needing this very soon.. litcherally.

Niomi Smart #46 Just send help!

 

[anythinggoes]

I can't believe Niomi has sunk so low that I actually miss Bradley. It's honestly sad at this point how lost she is.

 

[judgejohndeed]

Okay I have a wild theory… and it could very well be out to lunch. So here goes. Do we think that Nims could actually be getting married within the month? It wouldn’t surprise me. Or it could be a total coincidence. Here’s why lol:


- She brings back Lordon to her family home within weeks of meeting him
- Sister of Lordon states she’s the matchmaker and the best thing she’s done
- BFF Says she’s wearing “THE ring”
- Nims flies back to Bali weeks after returning to London and barely mentioning it to her followers.
- Nims Grandmother states she’ll miss her to which Nims replies “I’ll miss you too. See you in a month on the boat!” (Pretty far trek for her to travel no?)
- Nims first posts in Bali to her Instagram stories are: Shopping for lingerie & looking for a videographer & photographer. OH and she was recently at an event in London for a company who sells wedding dresses prior to leaving for Bali….

Again could be out to lunch and could very well be a coincidence lol.

The sad thing about this is her family would be egging her on rather than realising she desperately needs an intervention

 

[Critchley]

The sad thing about this is her family would be egging her on rather than realising she desperately needs an intervention

I don’t think there’s anything her family could do, given how ruthlessly she’s distancing herself from them

 

[judgejohndeed]

I don’t think there’s anything her family could do, given how ruthlessly she’s distancing herself from them

Yeah I agree but I mean, you can guarantee they'd be saying 'when you know you know! go get married, you only live once!!' rather than 'hey you didnt see a break up of 4 years coming, maybe slow down a bit'

 

[bahiaorange]

It's concerning that she appears to be selling the shed. There are plenty of real life stories on cults and selling your belongings is step one. Like @bahiaorange 's post on Rohini Elyse. And usually the earnings of the sales are put into the cult.

Hopefully we're just being paranoid but Lordon and his pal who likes to take photos like he's Jesus Christ are scary AF. Niomi's always been too dumb and too susceptible to adoration/fawning, but this only became more true since the breakup. She'll do anything for a little male validation.

As always, Niomi. Run to the therapy. RUN.

Totally agree! And one more aspect which will make her even more susceptible to buying into this... she's a full blown narcissist!

She LOVES surrounding herself with yes men, so meeting a group who will convince her she has this 'divine healing energy' and 'unique spiritual connection' and her purpose should be sharing this with us mere mortals who don't understand as some sort of wellness life coach is something Niomi will 100% lap up - particularly when her life in London has absolutely no meaning. Plus she has a large following already so instantly she'll be a big dog within the group and, as @QueenBW said, she thrives off attention and validation from others.

 

[LolitaBlah]

PRENUP NIOMI!!