Niomi Smart #24 Not-So-SmartSkin, posing naked to prove I’m thin, Joe put our photos in the bin

[sitkx]

I actually disagree that she was excited to move to India. To me it always seemed like she was just tolerating it and hoping they’ll return. Then she couldn’t hide her happiness and excitement when covid hit and they went back to London indefinitely

 

[lilamay]

Well, if she had married Marcus, I don't think Niomi Butler would have sounded the same lol. Niomi Smart-Butler lol.

Or Butler-Smart... Niomi BS would be fitting

 

[Callan]

Thanks for the pictures, man it's TINY and looks gimmicky. The only thing I like is how the kitchen opens out to the outside back yard. Which is also super tiny but better than nothing I guess. The bedroom with the slanted ceiling looks ridiculous, how do you not smash your head on that? It seems like a lot of open space but it still feels claustrophobic somehow because it's so narrow.

 

[TheGlossy]

At her age, if you don't have marriage/kids, you need a rock solid social circle (well, you need one of those anyway, but you know what I mean). She never really built one. In the break between Marcus and Joe, she was in her YT prime and life was full of work-based appointments and performative YT relationships. I think she must be pretty lonely now and trying to figure out why. I hope, for her sake, that she has friendships that are not just for the gram (intentionally or otherwise).

While I agree that you need a strong circle anyway, I disagree with the "at her age if you don't have marriage/kids". She's only 29, not 39. It's a bit archaic to think that if you're not married at 29, you're miserable (well, we know she is because her dream of the perfect family fell apart). Plenty of people are still single at 30 because they chose to focus on something other than relationships (generally, career oriented people). The issue is she doesn't have a passion for anything it seems. It's not like she has this amazing career that stimulates her intellectually and allows her to forget about the fact she's single. Her career revolves around her image. Nothing stimulating there. She could easily say she wants to focus on her career, but again, what is her job? She needs to figure out her overall direction in life, not just her relationships because galivanting around London is going to get old fast.

 

[TheGlossy]

What on earth is this?

 

[lilamay]

She's been on another podcast... The host describes her as 'an incredible entrepreneur' and 'a massive guiding light in sustainable living' No.

 

[Gflo93]

I know it’s probably silly but living where Brixton meets Clapham now makes me think about Sarah Everard, it feels unsafe to me now even though it probably is a relatively safe place to live (and he is in prison).

 

[AliceInUnderpants]

LOL at the idea of Nimbobs taking the bus….

 

[EGuyUK]

She has just posted her latest gifts....

A £555 necklace/plus collection (blue topaz or some rubbish?)

A £265 'tennis goddess' tennis outfit. From her own comments I'm sure she's admitted to not even following tennis, yet she goes to Wimbledon.

Oh and a 4.7kg 'bum' candle which is..... £240! I kid you not, two hundred and forty pounds.

40+ divorced mum evolution is complete.

So another £1k+ of gifts

 

[Joh73679]

This chick is on vacation 24/7. Spain 2x then Italia, then talking about planning another trip when she opens her Endless freebies & in 1 month she will say " i work so hard, i barely had some time off, i need a vacation". How s/o can be so delusional! She would NEVER be able to have a 9 to 5 job, certainly not as a lawyer!!! She thinks she is a badass business woman. No honey, you just have luck (referencing to being a famous YTer due to Marcus) & pretty (which is always an advantage to draw attention to you). Even her Smartskin stuff is run by other people, she is just the name of it as she doesn't know nothing about skincare. Sorry for the rant, i just saw her latest stories & post, i couldn't help it & i left her a message in IG who will certainly be deleted in the next hour. Feel better now, sorry again

As expected, she blocked me

 

[QueenBW]

It's weird. For someone as active as she is, she should be able to eat whatever she wants, including enough protein. I know people in their forties and fifties, who go to the gym two or three times a week only to be able to drink alcohol on weekends and eat things like pizza and ice cream. I don't understand why Niomi works out daily but still has to restrict her food.

Precisely because she restricts her food. The body adjust. If you only feed it 1000 calories a day and exercise away 300-400 of those, or more, then the body understands it's in a famine and must slow down its metabolism. She's screwed herself, basically.

 

[Callan]

I spy BREAD

Yeah I saw that, I was wondering if they are plastic props?

This is so Niomi lol

 

[Callan]

What’s joes Instagram?

@Joewoodward13

guess the other 12 were taken lol

 

[earlgrey]

So weird angle

View attachment 694780

Why does she look like a cardboard cutout

 

[earlgrey]

How cringe is this?

She’s so wild and fun, what a free spirit

 

[Callan]

That she blamed on her Saturn return. She did a whole podcast on it.

Lol, it's just so convenient to blame the fall of your relationship on Saturn, that sneaky planet probably hid the peanut butters too.

 

[QueenBW]

She has seriously overpaid! £740k is a lot and she could've got a 2 bed actual garden flat, not a weird mezzanine basement thing. I mean, good on her, at least she's finally spent some of her money- I'm thinking the main reason for buying there is her new bff Sarah, plus Dr Alex is round the corner if he becomes single again

But it's not a flat, it's a small semi-detached house. People pay a lot to have fewer neighbours nearby.

I still can't believe she can afford something like that from advertising mops, but that's the society we've created.

 

[LolitaBlah]

Somebody sort this out on Tattle pleaaase I can't!!

Lost and unethical influencer that is signed (still?) to gleam futures. Was engaged to Joe Woodward but broke up over a hidden peanut butter Jar. Unsure as of September 2020 if she has lost her old Kate-Middleton-Woodward-wife-worthy-personality and replaced it with wild-fun-crazy-hair-bimbo mimicking Joe's current GF.

More like it!

 

[Callan]

Very curious as to what wallpaper she will choose, and which classics will be featured on it. Little bit of Shakespeare, some Faulkner and Amy Schumer perhaps?

 

[morningsglory]

She has just posted her latest gifts....

A £555 necklace/plus collection (blue topaz or some rubbish?)

A £265 'tennis goddess' tennis outfit. From her own comments I'm sure she's admitted to not even following tennis, yet she goes to Wimbledon.

Oh and a 4.7kg 'bum' candle which is..... £240! I kid you not, two hundred and forty pounds.

40+ divorced mum evolution is complete.

So another £1k+ of gifts

Meanwhile, in Afghanistan....