Niomi Smart #12 Back at home drinking alone, dressing sexy with no one to bone

[Coldfeet]

Sorry to just jump in randomly but does anyone know why her and Joe broke up? I know it's none of my business I just want the goss

Dimbobs discovered that Joeeey was a cross dresser. To add insult to injury, he looked better in her slip dress than she did.
She confronted him and said, 'It's me or your new lacy underwear'.
He went for the camisole and matching garters.
She grabbed her spice jars and ran to Notting Hill.
End of pahhhhhfect life.

 

[QueenBW]

She suffered a huge loss, no living in the countryside with her 'bestie' now. Must find a replacement for Joey ASAP
This convo is like between two 12-year olds
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THIS is why I've never ever believed she actually wanted to move to Australia/follow Joe to India. She's been raised to think that success looks a certain way: a big manor house in the English countryside, 2-3 kids going to posh schools, a husband with a fancy job, her looking slimmer every year. Living abroad with all the change that brings has never been part of that equation.

 

[coriander]

THIS is why I've never ever believed she actually wanted to move to Australia/follow Joe to India. She's been raised to think that success looks a certain way: a big manor house in the English countryside, 2-3 kids going to posh schools, a husband with a fancy job, her looking slimmer every year. Living abroad with all the change that brings has never been part of that equation.

Agreed. I think she said those things to seem more up for adventure/make her life more exciting, when in reality she won't do it.

 

[Ramster93]

I am so bleeping sick of the whole “wellness” industry and people like Niomi who peddle it.

it’s such an incredibly privileged industry. Peddling bullshit about constant “self care”. Most of us don’t have the privilege of spending hours doing yoga and meditating every day. We have tough jobs with long hours. Long commutes. Hard studies. Children. Ill family members. I’m so so sick of being told by bullshit wellness merchants who have literally no worries, financial or otherwise, that I should be making time every day to practice wellness. Getting up at 6am to do yoga in front of a sunrise. If I could spend the rest of the day sat on my arse counting my money, maybe I would. But I have a toddler to get up with and care for, get to childcare, and then spend a full day working in a busy job before making dinner for my child, myself, and wrestling him to sleep sometime before 9pm.

Like most people I would love to spend hours a day practicing “self care” but my life is too busy. I’m so sick of smug wellness coaches and influencers who have no real job, no real responsibilities and a bleeping tit ton of money telling us that we aren’t happy or fulfilled enough if we don’t spend hours a day engaging in naval gazing and emotional masturbation like they do. It is causing people more stress than anything - it’s just another thing to fit into their busy days.

Sorry, slightly OT rant but I’m getting so fed up with the bullshit people like Dimbobs who don’t have a clue how real people live are promoting!

Insanely well said!

THIS is why I've never ever believed she actually wanted to move to Australia/follow Joe to India. She's been raised to think that success looks a certain way: a big manor house in the English countryside, 2-3 kids going to posh schools, a husband with a fancy job, her looking slimmer every year. Living abroad with all the change that brings has never been part of that equation.

100%!! And now, Dimbobs, miss single as a plant-based Pringle thinks she’ll have all of that in 2 years. Delusional AF, nobody who can surpass Joe in her eyes will actually want her, whether she’ll admit that or not is another story.

 

[agnor]

I mean with her looks she could get herself a decent guy but there’s no substance for the guy to stay longer. Only if she finds somehow her male version

 

[Fifi999]

Can someone share this link with. This woman called the yoga dissident talks about how the practice of yoga has been appropriated by Niomi-ittes with their skinny Lycra, bra lettes and misuse of the term namaste

 

[emm]

Oh please, she would withhold her child from social media. Her sister is different, that’s not really HER child. She treats her sister just like she treats the dog, awkward posing and giggles, then returns them quickly to mom.

confused about what you meant? I comes across as very aggressive. my first thought was "is this drunk niomi"?

 

[Jackie Daytona]

confused about what you meant? I comes across as very aggressive. my first thought was "is this drunk niomi"?

No, just being sarcastic. I’m saying she wouldn’t have a problem withholding her own child from social media but doesn’t apply the same standard to Daisy May, because after all, that’s not her child. She still got the, “you’re going to be such great parents” comments whenever she posted pictures of DM and Joe, without having to sacrifice her own child’s privacy.

 

[judgejohndeed]

I don’t think I can make it through this painful video but lol how she starts with skincare, no mention of HER OWN SKINCARE LINE and the first two products are two diff brands! You couldn’t make this tit up I swear to God!
also I really haaaaaate the blonde hair, it washes her out so much and she just looks so nondescript. At least when she had brunette hair she was a bit closer to being ‘pale and interesting.’ That particular shade does nothing for her complexion.

 

[coriander]

So she's trying to shill foundation and concealer, whilst using a filter on the video? Did BareMinerals tell her to do that? Technically it's false advertising.

 

[judgeydrudgey]

THIS is why I've never ever believed she actually wanted to move to Australia/follow Joe to India. She's been raised to think that success looks a certain way: a big manor house in the English countryside, 2-3 kids going to posh schools, a husband with a fancy job, her looking slimmer every year. Living abroad with all the change that brings has never been part of that equation.

Yep. At most, she’s spend 2-3 months in another country, staying at an #adgifted Airbnb and call that “living there” so she sounds more interesting and adventurous than she is

 

[milanolo]

So she's trying to shill foundation and concealer, whilst using a filter on the video? Did BareMinerals tell her to do that? Technically it's false advertising.

Agreed! She's trying to so hard to hide the true state of her skin with that filter but it glitched a few times during her video.

I don't have perfect skin myself but if she's trying to claim that whatever skincare (Smart Skin, Origins, new £££ brand etc.) is doing wonders for her skin while using a beauty filter, that really is just false advertising.

P.S.: thanks to you guys, all I can see in every photo/video of hers now are her clubbed fingernails

 

[just_popping_in_to_say...]

Hi, popping in here again! I can't believe that a week or two ago I unfollowed Niomi and checked out of this and... there have been so many posts! It seems like not much has changed with her. Again, who knows what is going on behind the scenes but I just find my major breakups have led to this period of either self-reflection or dramatic change in my life/schedule. How does she do it! Anywho, I am a big fan of Brittany Bathgate's videos (she put so much effort into titles, editing, music... almost as if this was her job, cough!) and she recently announced her own separation from her long time (12 year) partner. Just a year or two older than Nims but light years ahead in communication, thought and emotion. At least on camera. Do watch her announcement, first 10 mins of this. I found it really mature and a great direction for her viewers, it was honest and she spoke about what she will not discuss and also boundaries!!! It is so healthy sounding esp. when compared to others... cough cough cough hack cough. Also she reads a ton, she shares a lot of her book recommendations in this vid and others. And it's almost as if reading more than one book a year improves your vocabulary.

 

[Swipeupyouguys]

yeh i really agree, most people (who aren't shallow influencers) wouldn't broadcast their children on line like this, i bet he ends up with someone very private

I pray he ends up with gabby lindley

Sorry to just jump in randomly but does anyone know why her and Joe broke up? I know it's none of my business I just want the goss

they had four magical years but were on the wrong path and now she is on the right path of dreamyness.

We think they got on one anothers nevers when living under lock down rules in joe's family's (idyllic) holiday house on their estate. They both looked dreadful, she seemed to gain weight and he lost it. He hurt himself on a 10k couples funrun and she left him behind only to sing passively aggressively at him for eating toast on their special wellnessday.

She's never revealed more, so clues were located in the lock down videos. She seems pretty heartbroken, currently working her way through anger and having a rebound fling. Breaking the government safely guidelines in the process.

 

[ktboo]

Oh god guys I was nearly influenced after watching Niomi’s latest video (on the bare minerals site colour matching my foundation and everything) then I come on here and learn the truth that her skin actually isn’t that bloody perfect Bloody influencers.

 

[Swipeupyouguys]

Nerves*

Joey seemed sex starved and food starved.

 

[Qwert12]

I’m so glad her skin isn’t actually perfect, she’s just a normal person with skin textures and bumps like everyone else. Just wish she could be honest and not hide behind filters, pretending that all her exorbitantly priced skincare and facials has made her pahhhhfect. I can’t imagine lying so easily and encouraging hardworking people to waste their money on garbage when they could just buy a couple of the ordinary products and get the same results - skincare doesn’t fix all problems and only a few people will naturally have baby smooth skin (lucky them)

 

[Swipeupyouguys]

I

Hi, popping in here again! I can't believe that a week or two ago I unfollowed Niomi and checked out of this and... there have been so many posts! It seems like not much has changed with her. Again, who knows what is going on behind the scenes but I just find my major breakups have led to this period of either self-reflection or dramatic change in my life/schedule. How does she do it! Anywho, I am a big fan of Brittany Bathgate's videos (she put so much effort into titles, editing, music... almost as if this was her job, cough!) and she recently announced her own separation from her long time (12 year) partner. Just a year or two older than Nims but light years ahead in communication, thought and emotion. At least on camera. Do watch her announcement, first 10 mins of this. I found it really mature and a great direction for her viewers, it was honest and she spoke about what she will not discuss and also boundaries!!! It is so healthy sounding esp. when compared to others... cough cough cough hack cough. Also she reads a ton, she shares a lot of her book recommendations in this vid and others. And it's almost as if reading more than one book a year improves your vocabulary.

I watched, thanks for the comparison. I know nothing about Brittany but it seems this was a mutural falling out of love? Still painful, but niomi was (in her eyes) suddenly dumped after securing the ring and letting everyone know her fairy tale ending was coming to fruition. She was blindsided, and humiliated.

Really like that Brittany is buying second hand books. Niomi could start off listening to an audiobook, then gradually ease herself back into reading. She only references 50 shades of grey perhaps she likes erotica?!
Maybe she's a dom!!?

 

[judgejohndeed]

but Dimbobs...it’s not smoothie bowl weather

 

[kittymeowlondon]

does anyone else want a review of the yoga course? like who her teachers were, if it was worth the money?
methinks niomi hasn't got an analytical cell in her body to take on that, and clings to buzzwords so i doubt we may get a rundown of the course.
ah well.

also thanks to the person who posted those skin pics, i was feeling low about my skin but now i am so happy it is healthy and love it again.