New Zealand Influencers #59

[shh77]

So annoying cos I used to like her and now I actually can’t stand her stupid rants that say the same thing over and over again. Cries poor, lives it up and then cries poor again. Also, their brow pencils are tit lol I got two and one wouldn’t wind and one snapped on the first use. Don’t buy them hahah.

Same here! I find her to be so annoying now!
Oh no really?! I did wonder about the quality of her products?.. she’s always saying how she’d never release anything she wasn’t 100% happy with and is only the BEST quality, but clearly not! I hope you got a refund!

 

[notmadjustdisappointed]

Uggghhh bloody Edna is back with all her crew and friends with the real actors on shorty street and she's such a tit actress

Hope she's not on it too long she makes me cringe

 

[canigetfreestufftoo]

Watched Molly with the sound on today for a laugh. Fuuuuuuuuck. Her Koiwoi accent is criiiiiinge. And the vocal fryyyyyy. That would be annoying AF to listen to for any length of time. Maybe childfree could help her round out her vowels a bit…. But I did catch that she was going to catch up with someone in Rakaia, so maybe she’s got a dude….

 

[Bluntastitganache]

I genuinely don’t believe they’ve been approved for a mortgage with her “career”. Or it’s a tiny one which is why they aren’t successful lol.

I don’t think she will find her mid-century mansion in Fendalton on her $220,000 mortgage approval (joking have no idea if she rilly rilly is approved).

Good !! now I never have to see Brett no neck shilling candles ever again after today.

Molly go to the ear nurse and get your ear wax sorted no one deserves to see you picking like that. Put me off my nachos.

Has Bernadebt got a Barista job at her local BP Wild Bean “cafe” yet?

Danni my house needs a clean if you are up to it? $25 an hour . Please write me a cover letter first.

 

[stanleycupgal]

I don’t think she will find her mid-century mansion in Fendalton on her $220,000 mortgage approval (joking have no idea if she rilly rilly is approved).

Good !! now I never have to see Brett no neck shilling candles ever again after today.

Molly go to the ear nurse and get your ear wax sorted no one deserves to see you picking like that. Put me off my nachos.

Has Bernadebt got a Barista job at her local BP Wild Bean “cafe” yet?

Danni my house needs a clean if you are up to it? $25 an hour . Please write me a cover letter first.

This is the funniest post I've read in the while. Dying at the cover letter.

DD really is a nightmare, I dont think she's in the right job if she has 130k followers and cant monetize it. If I was Alex I would tell her to stop being a dreamer and start putting some money towards their living costs. No kids - they should be loaded.

 

[snarkersusie]

P.S. Danni i tell you what youre really good at. Rubbing people the wrong way.
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Where have you been?
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Fucken Maria. You dont need to keep posting these sort of memes im so sick of seeing it. We know youre bleeping lazy and hate humans and hate your own kids. Proof is your terrible dinner with unpeeled carrots.

What’s going to happen when the kids inevitably get social media and they see their Mums page is a homage to how much she loathes being a parent?

 

[mysteryuser123]

P.S. Danni i tell you what youre really good at. Rubbing people the wrong way.
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Where have you been?
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Fucken Maria. You dont need to keep posting these sort of memes im so sick of seeing it. We know youre bleeping lazy and hate humans and hate your own kids. Proof is your terrible dinner with unpeeled carrots.

Someone message and tell her she'd be a really good SLT

 

[Hinch-a-roo]

Watched Molly with the sound on today for a laugh. Fuuuuuuuuck. Her Koiwoi accent is criiiiiinge. And the vocal fryyyyyy. That would be annoying AF to listen to for any length of time. Maybe childfree could help her round out her vowels a bit…. But I did catch that she was going to catch up with someone in Rakaia, so maybe she’s got a dude….

I don’t follow Molly but I HATE vocal fry. Sarah Harris is another one bad for this.

 

[Humdog]

Who is this Molly ?

Mollybrownlee_ 2nd cousin or something to THAT Brownlee in parliament.
Profweeessional makeup artist from age of 14 (according to her).
Never washes her make up off - mascara can stay in place for days.
Talks and acts like a bogan grot. Photographic evidence of her peeing beside a boat at water's edge. Talks about it too. Does things you'd probably not prefer to see. Is trying to be relatable to ??? dunno.
Desperate for a farmer to rescue her and whish her off to his magnificent farm so she can dag sheep..
Travels the country providing make up tutorials to home bound farm wives, for far too much money but nothing to show for it. Maybe IRD came knocking.
USED to go every week to get hair washed and blow-dried at the salon cos she doesn't know how to do it. Has recently discovered it's a cost-of-living crisis and her business is going downwards fast. So bought a blow-dryer (LOL) to do her own hair. Also had to buy Revlon (shock horror) as her usual is now too expensive (double LOL).
Lives at home with mummy and daddy.
Turns 30 this August.
Had WLS, got skinny, is getting fat again due to copious alcohol and food intake.
Moulds herself into whoever the new bloke needs her to be. The last guy she saw referred to her as Mol-Hol - I kid you not. Sick - what she needs to do is realise her worth and focus on her own growth.

 

[Pentothal]

What’s going to happen when the kids inevitably get social media and they see their Mums page is a homage to how much she loathes being a parent?

I think they will know already Even Maria restricting what they can see doesnt stop their friends ability to use SM and then use it to make fun of them.

When your mum stays home to eat pies and doesnt turn out to your award presentation at school. That's a huge hint

When your mum doesn't let you go to friends after school, because she needs to control where you are all the time.

And when she constantly uses both children as forms of engagement, and has no qualms about embarrassing them with her posts, shows typical narcissistic mother behavior. If Maria puts the effort into her children, that she did for sign language week.....oh wait, she does

 

[rheanna231]

I don’t think she will find her mid-century mansion in Fendalton on her $220,000 mortgage approval (joking have no idea if she rilly rilly is approved).

Good !! now I never have to see Brett no neck shilling candles ever again after today.

Molly go to the ear nurse and get your ear wax sorted no one deserves to see you picking like that. Put me off my nachos.

Has Bernadebt got a Barista job at her local BP Wild Bean “cafe” yet?

Danni my house needs a clean if you are up to it? $25 an hour . Please write me a cover letter first.

duck me dead. This entire post is so funny
Gold

 

[purplestar01]

Awesome work phill. Unfortunately your wife would be far to lazy to make you a cake.

 

[rheanna231]

What’s going to happen when the kids inevitably get social media and they see their Mums page is a homage to how much she loathes being a parent?

Im surprised Chloe doesnt have social media yet?
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Awesome work phill. Unfortunately your wife would be far to lazy to make you a cake.

Geez Maria. You are 42. Act your age for once you old flop

 

[Pentothal]

Im surprised Chloe doesnt have social media yet?
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Geez Maria. You are 42. Act your age for once you old flop

If Chloe doesn't have it, she'll be seeing it via her friends. Nothing worse than being shown what your "stupid mother" posts on line ; second hand embarrassment, and not great for self esteem

 

[notmadjustdisappointed]

Wow ok.....coz everyone has $1k to drop on a knife making course

 

[ilovekmartlikedontweall]

Awesome work phill. Unfortunately your wife would be far to lazy to make you a cake.

Ohhh you beat me to it! Shame, Phil won’t get the same effort from MFM. Man, only 42 but acts like in the 90s!!! 🥲

 

[trentstillworksfromhome]

Ohhh you beat me to it! Shame, Phil won’t get the same effort from MFM. Man, only 42 but acts like in the 90s!!! 🥲

"Happy Birthday Phil, hahaha I got you a GF cupcake from Bluebells, but then I ate most of it....I was thinking of getting you a present and organising the kids to make a nice dinner for you, but then I didn't, because of wHo I aM aS A pErSoN! HAHAHA lolz memelife"

 

[fakestagram]

Was it her mum or grandma in hospital?

Her nana
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Louisa comment about tom holding the fort while she was away. Hahahahahaha him dealing with a drunk daughter she gonna have fun with those girls

But then let her be home alone and go to Kmart?? If my kid did what she did she would be grounded!

 

[#gifted#]

Awesome work phill. Unfortunately your wife would be far to lazy to make you a cake.

I want to see the kids lunches Phil made

 

[fakestagram]

I know Ellie would be the demanding type like this… I Val already see this is gonna be a flop. Who launches a luxury dog clothing brand in a cost of living crisis? Oh the same people that tried to sell $250 candles. Where are their friends and fam being like guys, what the duck.

And she brushed it off like it’s her personality or ADHD or whatever like uhhh no you’re being rude!!