Coffee Moaning and it is Caturday!
Oh and Mark is here to bore, disgust, infuriate and on the odd occasion amuse us. Title is "Britney Spears is FREE, Xmas Parties, Xmas Dinners, Saying Sorry & Losing Things."
"Are we still there?" He is wearing his LA Dodgers cap backwards, so cool NOT! "Hey guys! How you doing?" Roll call. "Hit the like button if you like and hit the dislike button twice if you don't like." He titters away after that comment, he thinks he is so hilarious.
Nads is off on her girls weekends and Mark shows us a pic of Nads holding a baby Maddie in diapers giving her a kiss on some holiday. Emma has an ear infection. Mark shows us another baby pic with Maddie, Fleur and Izzy. He says he is at home chillin' with the girls. Asks how we all are for the 5th time.
Just get on with it asshat! 
He is trying to find a word to alliterate with Saturday and can't find one.
How about SUCK IT SATURDAY, cuz that is how I feel watching this. Sinead asks if Mark will be cooking this evening.
Seriously Sinead? It will be take-out.
Someone says Super Saturday, Saturday Shenanigans. Stewart has finished painting the living room. Louise has had her booster and a flu jab coming.
16/8 chat. What is your favourite breakfast? Cold or warm? Mark says he is a cold, but likes a fry-up. Jane says a BLT and Mark says he has never got on with a BLT, whatever the hell that means. The way he pronounced pain au chocolat hurt my Francophone ancestors' souls.
Chocolatine!!!! 
And just when you think he can't get more annoying, the bugger has his porridge cold. Chelsea Girl says Salacious Saturday. "Oooh ding-dong."
Now he doesn't like that he asked the chatters they favourite breakfasts, as he is not eating until after noon today.
Dipstick.
Big, big, big earlobe news about Britney he says. They are all saying "freedom" in the chatbox. Mark says he hopes it all doesn't go south now.
Won't surprise me if it does. He is doing his Bojo mumbling routine. Mentions it being a disaster for Jedward if they went bald. He shows us his t-shirt that he found at the bottom of an old suitcase, "Save the Sinners." "It's naughty and I like it." Question how is it going to turn out for her? PLEASE HIT THE DISLIKE BUTTON TWICE IF YOU ARE DISLIKING US.
Elaine made a joking remark about Mark not being able to use his mouth and he says there was a little bit of an edge to it.
Twerp. No one else can make sarky remarks other than Mark. Jane thinks Britney will be hounded by the press for a slip up. Other than the conservatorship, is anyone checking for Britney these days? Anne said Jedward shaved their hair off for charity. It's Helen's 2nd anniversary today. Someone thinks she will do a tell all interview with Oprah. Elaine says no edge and he says he is only joking.
Yeah, right. Plugs Nadia's 16/8 vlog, the Rushes and the Cornwall vlog is going up today, finishing the Sunday Show, lost his glasses and
bored to death had a philosophical convo with Tim the Postie. Anyone watching Red Notice on Netflix? Mark might tonight. He watched The Many Saints of Newark and says he is a massive Ray Liotta fan. Millie Bobby Brown shooting second series of Enola Holmes "so cool." Cloddagh wants an introduction to Tim the postie.
Poor Tim.
Who says I love you to their children? This relates to the convo he had with Tim, who always says I love you to his kids. Awww. Mark posted a pic of him with a churros, much younger of course.
I don't understand this putting your whole life on the Internet. I see younger relatives and it's all just "look at me on vacay, look at me eating something, look at me in my bikini, look at trying to be artsy, LOOK AT ME, LOOK AT ME, LOOOOOKK AAAT MEEEEEE!!!!! 
Deep breath. Exhale. The chatters are all saying yes, other than Stewart who doesn't have kids but say it to his beagle.
Mark asks if it is too easy to say I love you.
Yes. Can you use the word love too much? He keeps saying I love you and it is CREEPING ME OUT!!! MAKE IT STOP!!
Mel is always emotional if she says it. Stephy says it to friends. Mark wonders if he has ever said that to a male friend.
Doubt it. Sharon says it depends on the type of person you are. Mark sent a text to Lisa telling her that he loves her and how she is a good friend etc. Emma says her mum always says she loves her before she goes out, just in case one of them dies.
Mark asks if Emma is a Scorpio by any chance. Talks about doing the love languages thingy for a HTSM and says it takes a lot out of them to do it.
Save it.
Mark's therapy session continues with Nanny Thelma telling him as a kid that she loved him so much, she could eat him.
He actually thought she would.
It would take a lot of butter, seasoning and spice to swallow Mark down. I think Nadia would just slather him in oil, tomato sauce, between some bread and make a toastie out of him. Mark would kiss his granddad on the forehead, until he was about 13 and he told him he was too old for that. He sobbed in bed that night.
Mayboo says it was a generational thing. Mel says their dad said they never had a relationship, even though they felt they had moments.
Good Lord, it's a group therapy session now. "It's like when Izzy says I love you dad, it's like oh wow, that's so cool."
"Like when I saw Fleur she said aww I love you dad and you're just like aww yeah, that's a result."
Who says sorry too much?
As a Canadian that is in the DNA. Chatters are agreeing. Mark says he is about to make a bold statement: says that saying sorry too much you are apologizing for being you.
I need to make note of that for my e-book "tit Mark Says." Huge sweeping statement: "That if you do, I think you're probably quite a nice person. You might lack confidence, you might be quite nervous, you might be, might be, you might be wanting you might be a bit co-dependant, you might be wanting a bit more from people than they are willing to offer, but I think probably a good egg."
Laura says no, she tries not to say sorry even if she is wrong.
Is Laura a Leo? 
Chat about sorry-offs. Helen says sorry I'm late.
Talk about sorrys being said too much. Mark says Nanny Di does it all the time and says it too much. He says he says sorry just to end an argument with Nads when she is wrong. Angie says no. Another says not when you don't mean it. Agree to disagree? Mark says Nadia uses that phrase all the time, but says it in a way that she still feels she is right.
Isn't that what that means? Sorry and being a walkover.
A walk over is an element in gymnastics, you mean pushover, the one who gets walked over. FFS! Did you know the word parliament comes from the word parler to talk? Thanks Mark. Mark wants us to make a pledge, to not say sorry for the small things.
I'm not one of your FANS!! Chelsea Girl says Brenda Lee was very sorry.
Pauline says HTSM is genius. Deborah says we will all be divorced tomorrow if we don't say sorry.
Do men apologize more than women. Chatters say no. Uses the word walkover again.
Talk about apologizing in front of the kids. Discovering at 17 that Nanny Di didn't know everything. Christine says 18 sleeps till Vlogmas. Emma says she apologizes for her existence.
It's never the shitheads who apologize for their existence is it? Bloody failed walking abortions. 
Mark wants us to report back tomorrow after not saying sorry. Talk about the use of the word fine and Mark wants people to say no, I'm fuckin
tit. Who likes parties?
Depends who's there. Julienne has a phobia about eating in public. Mark waffles on about having to get to know people and being alcohol-free. More ramblings from Mark and social phobia, wishes he could go to social gatherings with Nads.
She doesn't need you, she can chat to a lamp that one. Talks about finding people doing naughty things in the loo. Party chatter. Faith asks if Mark dances at wedding. Mark tells us about going to Nadia's Jordanian relative's wedding, says he won't dance, then ended up dancing in the bedouin wedding dance. Nadia was with her Jack and Coke in a corner, "pissing with laughter...pointing in that way that she does." Christine asked if he had a good time and the answer is no. He felt "humiliated and stupid."
Miserable sod.
Bookings for business celebrations down because of COVID.
I have never been to an office party, feigned illness because it is that time of year. Though I wish I went the time one of the young IT guys was drunk, trying to get the big boss lady on the dancefloor. Mark asks if you have every photocopied a body part at an office party. Of course he has, his face and butt. Juvenile. Chelsea Girl did her boob. Emma says no, she can't even look at herself in the mirror and Mark says "Oh Emmaaaa! Giving you big hugs." Sharon says boobies at a party and they put them all on a wall!
Mandy says "2 words-Advent Calendars." Oh yes, remember that shambles last year? Mark points his finger and
. Hey Sharona. HOPE YOU'VE HAD FUN. HIT THE DISLIKE BUTTON TWICE TO GET DOUBLE THE SATISFACTION BUT HIT THE LIKE BUTTON ONCE. HAVE A LOVELY DAY, CONTENT IS COMING, MEMBER'S LIVE LATER WITH NANNY DI, RECORDING MESSAGES. CONFESSIONS ON BEING TOO SOFT ON THE KIDS, RUSHES AND NADIA'S FASTING DIARY. WE TRY TO DELIVER A VARIETY, POT POURRI, LUCKY DIP, SAWDUST, SEE YOU LATER! Bye!
