Mumsnet #38 imagine spending £100 on a notebook and writing 'bleach arsehole' in it

[TheMiceInTheShed]

Some more fantastic reading comprehension being displayed today
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First reply
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God almighty!

The drama over name-stealing is off the scale in MN.

I don't know why they don't keep their chosen name in the hidden wall safe, next to their tiaras, and only bring it out for the baptism.
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The what now?
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I'll bet you that that effete twit has written a slim volume of verse.

 

[Lovespizza]

Another food thread where someone is arguing that an apple and 50g of hummus is (in her very own words) a nutrituous meal that sees her through 20k steps and a pilates class
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Someone did this on a centre parcs thread
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Trez1510 I love you

 

[Brandshinynew]

Have we seen the one about "should I sleep out in London"? Utter insanity. She's considering leaving her house in the Midlands to sleep rough in London in order to access an employment support scheme. In what world could that ever be an idea?!

As someone on the thread pointed out, if she's homeless she's not going to have sn address, never mind a London one so she wouldn't qualify. And wtf is her blue badge going to do for her if she's homeless??

 

[Sunlifeover50]

Have we spoken about the neighbours builders, on scaffolding outside the OPs bedroom window yet? It’s absolutely disgusting and one person has said it’s absolutely fine because everyone has to poo. I mean who in the right mind would think that’s ok???

 

[orangehead]

Have we spoken about the neighbours builders, on scaffolding outside the OPs bedroom window yet? It’s absolutely disgusting and one person has said it’s absolutely fine because everyone has to poo. I mean who in the right mind would think that’s ok???

I saw that, it’s vile and it surely must be illegal/breaching something! Everyone does have to poo but there’s a time and a place and that isn’t it!

 

[ZanzibarDreaming]

When was that photo taken?

Well, I was in London today and absolutely nobody was dressed like that.

I was in one of the bits MN are all too scared to go to, though!

 

[Cheddar Chalpupa]

I'd be absolutely furious about it anyway, but why the actual duck have they put it bang in front of the window instead a few feet forward where there is no window. I was sat here thinking that I would climb out of my window and stick a raw chicken in there at the weekend so they get maggots (Which is probably why they blocked the window, maybe that's happened in the past!)

Edit - I'd also sit by the window and narrate their comings and goings "the fat blonde fella has gone in there, yet again"

Edit again - and I'd bang on it when I knew someone was in there.

On seconds thoughts there is a lot of fun to be had (just a shame the pay off is a bleeping vile smell permeating your bedroom!)

 

[definitelynotvlad]

What’s wrong with pasta??

 

[bread-pitt]

What’s wrong with pasta??

Take a seat…the therapist will see you shortly.

 

[HotDawg]

Imagine the horror of being raised in a bug squashing home!

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What’s wrong with pasta??

It’s a carb !!!!!!! and it’s very processed. It’s absolutely awful for you and basically poison. You’ll be obese if you eat pasta ever. Maybe you don’t care about being fat and eating UPFs but some people do! (Not me but ya know…?!)

 

[Serene Serena]

It’s a carb !!!!!!! and it’s very processed. It’s absolutely awful for you and basically poison. You’ll be obese if you eat pasta ever. Maybe you don’t care about being fat and eating UPFs but some people do! (Not me but ya know…?!)

Pasta is often served with a tomato sauce and we all know how tomatoes are sugar bombs Plus you can't eat pasta without a handful of grated cheese on the top. I bloody love the stuff and that's why I am size Sicilian.

 

[Geetbo]

I’m just trying to imagine Dteacher coming out and saying “little Persephone squashed a fly today. What are you going to do about it?”

 

[Serene Serena]

I’m just trying to imagine Dteacher coming out and saying “little Persephone squashed a fly today. What are you going to do about it?”

A woman at work squashed a bumble bee recently, and by the furious reactions of my colleagues, you'd have thought she'd murdered her first born child. For context <tinkly laugh> she's a bit thick and thought it was a wasp.

 

[Affiliatemebaby]

I GUARANTEE the boy will be nonplussed and shrug. OP will be back to cry and wail about the amount of money they’ve spent on him, and the thread will descend into:

1. Slagging off the OP for spending all that money on flights when most people can’t afford a pleather tote from Primark

2. Demands that the OP kick out the grateful little tit of a STEP son as soon as he turns 18, and…

3. Dark insinuations about the OP being a wicked stepmother and was she the cause of her husband’s marriage break up?

I can’t believe they’re not planning to tell him they’re in business class. Surely he needs to get his crisp white shirt and drapey cashmere ready? Or is that just women?

 

[Iamonlyhereforthetea]

Isn’t that convenient Allotment Woman missed a call from her solicitor so now is dragging this ridiculous tale out all weekend.

Waiting for the cheerleaders to come up with plans to come to where she lives and help move Babs out

 

[Sunlifeover50]

#justiceforbabs

 

[ZanzibarDreaming]

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Isn’t that convenient Allotment Woman missed a call from her solicitor so now is dragging this ridiculous tale out all weekend.

Waiting for the cheerleaders to come up with plans to come to where she lives and help move Babs out

That really is unbelievably coincidental timing, isn’t it?

 

[orangehead]

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Isn’t that convenient Allotment Woman missed a call from her solicitor so now is dragging this ridiculous tale out all weekend.

Waiting for the cheerleaders to come up with plans to come to where she lives and help move Babs out

Oh, no! A cliffhanger! Who’d’ve thought it.

 

[Miss Begotten]

I’m just trying to imagine Dteacher coming out and saying “little Persephone squashed a fly today. What are you going to do about it?”

Fly squashing is quite clearly a gateway crime. If it isn’t nipped in the bud immediately by this time next year Persephone will be running around the village fete with a rocket launcher in one hand and an umbrella with a poisoned tip in the other.

 

[Geetbo]

Fly squashing is quite clearly a gateway crime. If it isn’t nipped in the bud immediately by this time next year Persephone will be running around the village fete with a rocket launcher in one hand and an umbrella with a poisoned tip in the other.

Or even worse - she may grow up to be a size 12.