Met at work over zoom

[LittleMy]

Can’t we all settle this over a McMilkshake?

 

[MrsEms]

You mean… you met at work?

Nah, I was going out with his best mate

 

[watermelon sugar]

Will you also try and shag me though?

If you're lucky

 

[Giggling Squid]

I’ve met this man through work but because of the panny d I’ve only ever met him over zoom and I am head over heels! He’s exactly the type of man id go for and I want to get to know him better BUT we don’t live anywhere near each other.

I only know him in a professional capacity but we gel so well and the attraction is so strong. My friends found out he’s single but I don’t know how to make the first move over zoom he’s actually superior to me too so don’t want to be disciplined for Being inappropriate . I have a feeling he likes me too but it’s zoom so can’t assume.
Is there any way I can talk to him out of work?? I can’t find his insta but could add him on Facebook I guess. It’s also urgent because he’s getting reassigned soon. Or do I just forget?!

This doesn’t sound like OP has only met him once, that seems to be something someone has assumed - which I definitely wouldn’t from this.

I honestly don’t see the problem with her adding him. As has been said, ball is in his park if she adds him, he can accept or ignore it. I’ve been added by male co workers, and have deleted the request - it’s ok for a man to do it so why not a woman?

 

[Scorpihoe]

Haha. Trust me, I'm wondering myself!

The worst part is that at the time, I wasn't looking for anyone at all. I had just started in the company and he had just returned from a secondment overseas from my understanding. I was so heartbroken that I had willingly left my previous job that befriending anyone in the new company was not on my radar at all (that's also why it took me two months to notice him). He just popped up out of nowhere, literally.

I could possibly try, especially as I've now left the company, but I deactivated my LinkedIn first and homeboy deleted his Instagram a few days later (go figure - at least we have social media instability in common lol). To be honest, I can't get over him even after all this time. I'm the perfect example of what you shouldn't do (as in sit in a corner and rely on hope).

In all honesty, I've never ever made a move on anyone aside from some kid at school at 15 and he said he didn't like me. I've been traumatized ever since and swore to myself I'd never make a move as more than likely, no one would reciprocate. I'm hopeless!

You’ve left the company so you can’t even get in trouble over it too imagine if, after 2 years he’s still thinking about you too okay I’m probably romanticising this all in my head but it could happen! For OP too, we only regret the chances we didn’t take. Either it turns into a beautiful romance or you get the answers you wanted. I am a highly curious person though, no stone is left unturned

I met my now boyfriend by chance, we both attended a party just as I was getting out of an awful relationship. I saw him and just felt like I wanted to be with him forever. I never approached him but thought about him for weeks, until my friend pushed me to get his number from a mutual friend! Been together for 4 years and planning to get married soon not the same thing because I only waited a few weeks not years (can you tell I’m impatient?)

 

[WilmaHun]

I think the jury is out and the OP should definitely add her colleague on FB

 

[watermelon sugar]

I have just witnessed something truly beautiful...I can feel the love in the room right now
Big mac anyone?

This truly beautiful thing.. are you gonna add it on Facebook?

 

[watermelon sugar]

It seems pretty self-evident.

Work is not a dating app. I think now that we have moved into this "virtual" world, people seem to blur boundaries.

Not really, work has been a place that many people have met before. Why should it be any different because it's over Zoom? She thinks he's attractive, go for it.

 

[Giggling Squid]

Yeah that’s kind of my point.

Take it out of context for a second.

You are working in a bar. A guy comes in and orders a drink with a group of his friends. They come in a few times and you serve him his drinks and have a few conversations about what drinks he wants etc - all professional and related to the job you are doing at the bar.

Then you random get a friend request from this man on your personal Facebook. He’s somehow found your profile, when you’ve never given him any encouragement to do so or bedn anything other than professional and you don’t actually know him nor really like him, he’s just a guy that comes into the bar.

you don’t think that’s weird?!

Granted it was a few years ago now, but I have been in that exact situation- I ignored the request and thought nothing more of it

 

[MaryX82]

Is there anyway you can get his email?Send him something a little bit flirty and add your mobile number and social media for him to get in contact.Go for it.Although that being said don’t shit where you eat.Is he higher up in the company so that if he pisses you off you won’t have to see him or deal with him at all.Anyway good luck

 

[Easilyannoyed]

Wouldn’t you think it was really weird though if you were him? God knows how many people he’s in contact with over zoom as part of his job - can you imagine then having some random person from work who you’ve never met in real life and have no real world interactions with, and no non-work related conversations with - if they had trawled Facebook to find you and then added you as a friend?!!!! It’s a bit stalker-ish/bunny boiler?! The guy hasn’t made any moves - has been nothing but professional- and yet this girl has built some fantasy around it where she thinks they have “a connection” - the poor bloke!!!!! It’s all well and good finding someone attractive or whatever but bloody hell - stalking them on private social media is pretty unhinged!!!

I get your point but if he doesn’t accept it kind of answers the question he isn’t into her. I added my partner 7 years ago on it we met at work now we are engaged and are expecting a baby. I think the real thing here is she only knows him in a professional way which is difficult to gage if he is just being polite.

 

[jarv]

I was being sarcastic.

Eh?! Or do you just feel foolish and trying to save face

 

[LaurieLaurie]

I think if he was interested he would have made a move to talk to you elsewhere. Men don’t hang around imo.

 

[watermelon sugar]

Everyone please

Stop arguing

Let's settle this, come to my Mcdonalds, where I supposedly work, and I'll give you all a big mac X

 

[watermelon sugar]

Going by that standard then, you should never add anyone you meet off Tinder on social media because it makes you a stalker and a weirdo!!! I forgot people are only allowed to be interested in people they know in the flesh...

Exactly?!

 

[nbt]

Nah, I was going out with his best mate

Oh I’ve been there girl! That’s a whole other thread though

 

[potatowaffles]

No advice but absolutely adore “the panny d”. That is absolutely the type of nonsense my husband and I would be spouting and I’m going to introduce it this evening He’s gonna love it too.

Sorry I can’t be of any actual help

OT but pls report back with what he says

Honestly though, I’d just sent him a friend request or a wee message and take it from there. I mean if he’s leaving anyway it’s almost the best possible scenario as it means if it doesn’t work out there won’t be as much/if any awkwardness.

I honestly just say shoot your shot and see where it lands. Good luck

 

[July9696]

I’ve met this man through work but because of the panny d I’ve only ever met him over zoom and I am head over heels! He’s exactly the type of man id go for and I want to get to know him better BUT we don’t live anywhere near each other.

I only know him in a professional capacity but we gel so well and the attraction is so strong. My friends found out he’s single but I don’t know how to make the first move over zoom he’s actually superior to me too so don’t want to be disciplined for Being inappropriate . I have a feeling he likes me too but it’s zoom so can’t assume.
Is there any way I can talk to him out of work?? I can’t find his insta but could add him on Facebook I guess. It’s also urgent because he’s getting reassigned soon. Or do I just forget?!

 

[watermelon sugar]

The panny d this is what I'm gonna call it from now on

 

[Mrs Cucumber]

I’ve met this man through work but because of the panny d I’ve only ever met him over zoom and I am head over heels! He’s exactly the type of man id go for and I want to get to know him better BUT we don’t live anywhere near each other.

I only know him in a professional capacity but we gel so well and the attraction is so strong. My friends found out he’s single but I don’t know how to make the first move over zoom he’s actually superior to me too so don’t want to be disciplined for Being inappropriate . I have a feeling he likes me too but it’s zoom so can’t assume.
Is there any way I can talk to him out of work?? I can’t find his insta but could add him on Facebook I guess. It’s also urgent because he’s getting reassigned soon. Or do I just forget?!

If he's being reassigned maybe drop him a message saying thanks for making working via zoom bearable etc, see if he responds! Life's too short for maybes