Lydia Millen #141 Ascot hat woes, unrestrained toes, Lavazza sales rep promos = new career lows
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I was always told you should use your hands, and just break the leaves.Why did she cut lettuce with a bread knife?
No dear heart - that’s lettuce! Anyone could see she was chopping spinach
To be fair, she had the concentration of a Buddist Monk for the monumental task at hand
Around the 39/40 minute mark in her video she tells Ali she ordered new cutlery and kinda looks at him as if she thinks he’s gonna react badly. The way she says it makes me think he doesn’t react well to her buying new things. Has Ali ever bought anything for their house 
. A chair, a fork.... a pot ?
. A chair, a fork.... a pot ?
At this point I think the wardrobes in her dressing room are empty. She's only wearing the same few items over and over!
I hope EVERYONE noticed the Perennial Trug!
Did you? Did you notice it?
This shows she is a true country woman and has collected her 9 lettuce sorry spinach leaves in her trug!
It‘s all for show you know - Ho Ho…
Did you? Did you notice it?
This shows she is a true country woman and has collected her 9 lettuce sorry spinach leaves in her trug!
It‘s all for show you know - Ho Ho…
Ah damn I must’ve missed the trug. How will I go on w my life.
I have that exact trug...I think I said before, I bought it for my mum and had it when she died.
Correct me if I’m wrong but that Josie in the back at 47:35 in her video ? They didn’t even acknowledge eachother ? I’m still new to who’s who so sorry if that’s not her.
a tip I feel compelled to share to those who go through the pain of watching her videos. Playback speed 1.75 or 2 NOTHING below or you’ll fall asleep
a tip I feel compelled to share to those who go through the pain of watching her videos. Playback speed 1.75 or 2 NOTHING below or you’ll fall asleep
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That chopping board looks absolutely RANK
With all the dirty parcels she lays there to unbox...that must be the only seasoning she uses (re: the saddest mozzarella salad ever)
I’m a (formerly) working class, country northerner who has become a pretentious prick London corporate whatever and I have never heard anyone outside of a menu somewhere rural refer to the ‘kitchen garden’.
Now I may stand alone as the moneyed folks I spend time with are city-dwellers but you’d think in either my country life or my twattier life, I’d have heard this if it were common.
Am I alone in this?
Not much to say about the flog. It’s incredibly dull. But to be fair, even though I’d absolutely love to spend time in such a beautiful place (Thyme, not the bunga garden), I’d get nothing from an enforced tour of it - much less a video about it. Maybe I’m just a misery. It’s likely. But Christ…I mean, OH MY GOODNESS. Which is another thing folks around me don’t say.
I think I just need to go to bed.
PS. I feel like she said somewhere that you had to meticulously wash the leaves because of little slugs but I may have hallucinated that as I usually listen after a Valium when I’m trying to sleep.
Now I may stand alone as the moneyed folks I spend time with are city-dwellers but you’d think in either my country life or my twattier life, I’d have heard this if it were common.
Am I alone in this?
Not much to say about the flog. It’s incredibly dull. But to be fair, even though I’d absolutely love to spend time in such a beautiful place (Thyme, not the bunga garden), I’d get nothing from an enforced tour of it - much less a video about it. Maybe I’m just a misery. It’s likely. But Christ…I mean, OH MY GOODNESS. Which is another thing folks around me don’t say.
I think I just need to go to bed.
PS. I feel like she said somewhere that you had to meticulously wash the leaves because of little slugs but I may have hallucinated that as I usually listen after a Valium when I’m trying to sleep.
Yes I remember you mentioned. A lovely keepsake!
I have been known to put small trugs of potpourri in my bathrooms.
She goes trug-swinging for effect…Mind you at least she knows what it’s for!
Why did she delete tbe latest pics of her and ali on holiday off her grid
Well it’s funny you should say that! Keep this to yourself but there’s a rumour going round that the chopping board got arrested for being filthy in a public kitchen. I don’t know how true these rumours are though and cannot comment on their veracity. Personally, I think that’s a bit steep when a bit of Dettol would probably sort everything out. I am a rank amateur in the kitchen though so don’t even deserve an opinion…
Kitchen garden is deffo an affectation.
Unless it’s somewhere like Chatsworth or one of the massive country houses which fed the servants on site.
No one with a small plot of land the size of Lydia’s has a kitchen garden. They have a vegetable patch.
As in:- My vegetable patch is mostly empty as I haven’t really bothered to fill it up after all that fuss and commotion earlier in the year…
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Another Brilliant recap.Congratulations to @Catcher_In_The_Lie for the brilliant thread title with 33 votes
In a stiff competition the winner of the Weak Wrist of the Week Award goes to..... Ali.
His wrist was well and truly slapped out of his boxer shorts by his wife when he was fangirling Splainer in the dark, robbing him of a happy ending. Get well soon Ali! And commiserations...
This recap was written on a blustery afternoon, just sayin! Yup, another quiz, sorry! (Less typing...)
What upset Lidl so much she couldn't vlog for two nights?
A. Bullying a pregnant hairdresser
B. Seeing a woman collapse at The Ascot
C. Travelling to Azerbaijan for the night
D. Going to a concert at the O2
What feature does Lidl like to draw attention to?
A. Her trotters
B. Her wonky boobs
C. Her thigh gap
D. Her cankles
Lidl visited her grandmother...the one who took her in when she was "homeless".... What gift did she take with her?
A. An orange blossom cake
B. A home grown ( in Daylesford ) lemon
C. A jar of home made chutney
D. A bouquet of holey lettuce leaves from the kitchen garden
Lidl told viewers to be "conscious" that a dress she bought in every colour was...
A. Greasy
B. Creasy
C. Classy
D. Crass
What does Lidl have in her English village garden "boarders"?
A. Hollyhock
B. Slugs
C. Foxgloves
D. A gardener
Lidl describes herself as..
A. Endearing
B. Enduring
C. Desperate
D. Amazing
What water sport has Lidl been doing this week?
A. Vertical swimming
B. Synchronised swimming
C. Water boarding
D. Washing "really well"
Who was Lidl twinning with this week?
A. Naked PR man Chris
B. Ali
C. Fairmont hotels PR Nick
D. Grossie
What "didn't have what it takes to thrive in this fast paced environment"
A. Her fashun sense
B. Grossie
C. A fern
D. Her authenticity
What did 'model' Lidl describe as "her runway"?
A. The airport
B. The M1
C. Her private lane
D. Her garden
What was Lidl sad about?
A. She forgot to leave instructions for watering the Greedhouse
B. Her failing career
C. Ali's grandfather's garden
D. A deer
How did Lidl describe the ruching on a bikini from her 'collection'?
A. Simplistic
B. Sympathetic
C. Synthetic
D. Gold dust
What is Lidl not comfortable with?
A. Loose clothing
B. Feathered hats
C. Nipple tassels
D. Ruffled bikinis
What did Lidl wear to the Bertoli by Thyme summer soiree table linen launch?
A. One star Amazon dress
B. Polyester Karen Millen dress
C. Sweaty dirty Erdem dress
D. Tablecloth
What habit has Lidl adopted lately?
A. Swallowing mid sentence
B. Speaking slowly and over enunciating like Rosie the Londoner
C. Walking on tippy toes
D. Hanging out of the Velux window taking pics of the sunrise
What was Lidl complaining about?
A. Cities
B. The cost of filling up the RR with petrol
C. British Airways
D. Ali fangirling
E. Squitty doggy bottoms
Which veg featured this week (do not have to be from kitchen garden!)?
A. Chili Peppers
B. Mange tout
C. Carrots
D. Onions
In other news
Amelia has bought a black Hermès Kelly 25
Grossie was #gifted an Anya Hindmarsh gardening tote and is working with Rodial
Ali met David Beckham...again
Photo courtesy of our @Peppypoopar
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I certainly hope you did not injure your left wrist typing this amazing, funny quiz. I started to sweat at question #2. What feature does Lidl like to draw attention to?
A. Her trotters
B. Her wonky boobs
C. Her thigh gap
D. Her cankles
I was thinking… all above… were is all above!
I guess we will know when the happy couple decide to have a baby - there will be an industrial sized stiff yard brush head strategically placed in the bedroom for the pregnancy/pollination process
Not sure I will be able to cope watching her use a make-up brush on her face again 🫣
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