Lucy Letby Case #4

[Ittybittytittyclub]

It says “killing me”
“Them” is part of the next line that says “care for them”

Some bits I can work out are; ‘I don’t deserve mum and dad’ ‘I don’t deserve to live’ ‘all getting too much’ ‘taking over my life’ ‘what does the future hold’ ‘how can I get through it’

What I think people are glossing over is the fact the note was found on her first arrest. I’m presuming at this point she had no idea she was potentially going to be charged with murder. So why is she writing about killing children?

It says in the note about police investigation. So I don’t know if she knew they were investigating before she wrote the note, or if she wrote the note after being arrested the first time.

 

[stardust1]

Can anyone work out what is said on top of the post it not the bit that is underlined?

 

[Ittybittytittyclub]

Can anyone work out what is said on top of the post it not the bit that is underlined?

Just underneath that starting on the left hand side says ‘there are no words’. Next to that it says ‘I am an awful person, I pay everyday for that’

 

[Milktray]

I find that note really sad to look at tbh. I’m not saying I think she’s innocent, I’m still undecided on this. But all the ‘I don’t deserve to live’ and the feeling of hate she seems to have for herself is just sad. It’s hard to articulate because if she has committed these crimes I don’t want to feel any sort of empathy for her, but just seeing that note has made me feel… I don’t really know the word. Not how I expected though. This is all scrambling my brain a bit. It’s not black and white and I think there will be a lot of twists and turns over the next few months. Thinking of the families always though as it’s easy to get swept up in this and forget it’s so very real for these people.

Its a tough one isn't it? This seemingly lovely girl who had her whole life ahead of her. And it begs the question, what happened? She could be guilty of these crimes...but what happened to her frame of mind to get to that point? She may be innocent and her whole life will never be the same.
I don't believe that she went into that job because she was evil.

 

[Its_Me]

What I think people are glossing over is the fact the note was found on her first arrest. I’m presuming at this point she had no idea she was potentially going to be charged with murder. So why is she writing about killing children?

Good point. But the cps obviously didn’t consider that a confession and think it was enough to charge her at that point. I wonder what it was that did eventually secure the charge.

 

[Lucyxxxx]

Some bits I can work out are; ‘I don’t deserve mum and dad’ ‘I don’t deserve to live’ ‘all getting too much’ ‘taking over my life’ ‘what does the future hold’ ‘how can I get through it’


It says in the note about police investigation. So I don’t know if she knew they were investigating before she wrote the note, or if she wrote the note after being arrested the first time.

Didn't they only search her house the third time she was arrested? I could be wrong though.

 

[stardust1]

Just underneath that starting on the left hand side says ‘there are no words’. Next to that it says ‘I am an awful person, I pay everyday for that’

I thought it said not good enough but can’t work out the third underlined. If it does it is a bit of a bizarre title. The note comes across very me me me considering babies have died and parents have lost their children.

 

[CharlieTYBT]

When Christopher Halliwell was arrested he told police he was a sick bastard. I know it's different circs but the way she speaks in her notes may not necessarily mean she's innocent and having an innocent outburst of anguish and like a pp said it could just be her panicking about being caught along with the mentioning of never having her own family because of this all. It could be an anguished outburst at finally being found out and the realisation of the trouble she's in hitting her. Remember she texted a doctor asking if she should be concerned about questions another doctor asked her before she was investigated and arrested, maybe like guilty conscience

 

[MmmB777]

What I think people are glossing over is the fact the note was found on her first arrest. I’m presuming at this point she had no idea she was potentially going to be charged with murder. So why is she writing about killing children?

This is really interesting. If it’s the scrawling of a seriously mentally ill person in anguish… I’m wondering when you get to that point or if you’re truly innocent you’d be terrified but would you maybe retain some confidence for a period of time because ultimately you know you did nothing wrong. Certainly people (with low IQ especially) can falsely confess under duress and lots of interrogation. How much of that was she under at this point and when at home? I think I’d still be in disbelief and quite sure I’d be proven innocent because I was. If she was seriously mentally ill with something like bipolar or having a severe mental breakdown(so severe she wrote I did it I’m evil
I killed them) at her first arrest, why has she recovered enough now to be fit to stand trial? Just thoughts! The difference in pressure and the look of the pen is interesting too.. maybe a handwriting expert would be able to analyse whether they thought the confessional parts were added at a later date, it sort of looks possible. Fascinating and terrifying!

 

[Emmelina Ball]

That’s why I am interested to hear about one of the babies. I know my baby had the same thing and he was never on deaths door but ultimately we were under the care of one of the best uk children’s hospitals. He did need bag mask ventilated due to a morphine overdose however it was dealt with so quick and a report was drawn up about it and an investigation to see if he was brain damaged. there was definitely no one getting the blame or pinned to a murder trial. The hospital it’s self have a lot of answering too but hopefully something will come up in evidence about who or if anyone raised concerns.

Hope your baby is doing better now
I agree we need to hear more and I really hope there is evidence of people raising and acting on concerns because it’s their duty to, I hope those parents can get answers for what did happen and be confident it’s the truth so justice can be served. Nothing will ever bring their precious babies back but they are even being robbed of grief without knowing exactly what happened and all the wondering of what side are right.

 

[Stiltoncheese]

I'm presuming prosecution will call their first witness tomorrow now both opening speeches have concluded. I wonder if they will go straight in for the medical experts as they appeared to attend today or whether they will call character witnesses or perhaps colleagues?

 

[Ittybittytittyclub]

Didn't they only search her house the third time she was arrested? I could be wrong though.

I honestly don’t know so wouldn’t like to say. I was replying to another poster asking the timing of when the note was found x

 

[Hannah_204]

Could she have done it because she couldn’t cope under a lot of stress didn’t really think it through then the weight of what she’s done sinks in when she’s put on admin and that’s when she starts writing the note? Just thinking out loud
That note just makes me think if she’s done it it wasn’t cold blood type of thing it was extreme stress

 

[stardust1]

Hope your baby is doing better now
I agree we need to hear more and I really hope there is evidence of people raising and acting on concerns because it’s their duty to, I hope those parents can get answers for what did happen and be confident it’s the truth so justice can be served. Nothing will ever bring their precious babies back but they are even being robbed of grief without knowing exactly what happened and all the wondering of what side are right.

Thank you, he is a lot better now. It must be terrible having to play it back in your mind over and over there must be so many what ifs for them

 

[Former_Antelopee]

I thought it said not good enough but can’t work out the third underlined. If it does it is a bit of a bizarre title. The note comes across very me me me considering babies have died and parents have lost their children.

I mean if she is innocent and these are her worried about what’s going to happen to herself then wouldn’t it be normal for it to be about her? She may not have been thinking about the babies/parents as she was worried about what would happen to herself even if innocent or guilty

 

[Tangent Tiger]

Its a tough one isn't it? This seemingly lovely girl who had her whole life ahead of her. And it begs the question, what happened? She could be guilty of these crimes...but what happened to her frame of mind to get to that point? She may be innocent and her whole life will never be the same.
I don't believe that she went into that job because she was evil.

I really have no idea. The notes do make it seem she was guilty. A lot of us have times when we feel down about ourselves but not to the extent where we'd take it out on children or animals, so it's incomprehensible.

I don't know, it has to be left to trial.

 

[stardust1]

I mean if she is innocent and these are her worried about what’s going to happen to herself then wouldn’t it be normal for it to be about her? She may not have been thinking about the babies/parents as she was worried about what would happen to herself even if innocent or guilty

I guess but someone said the note was found at the first arrest so if you were innocent and at that point in time would you really feel that strongly about it by then? I’d like to think she knew there was nothing to hide as after all she is innocent.

 

[bringingdownthebs]

Just catching up after being offline all day! I think the timing of the note is perhaps more key than the content of it. Just my early thoughts but I’m catching up with the thread!

 

[Former_Antelopee]

I guess but someone said the note was found at the first arrest so if you were innocent and at that point in time would you really feel that strongly about it by then? I’d like to think she knew there was nothing to hide as after all she is innocent.

Guess so. Only thing I could think is maybe if she is innocent but as we know she was there for all the deaths. It could’ve been on her mind and blaming herself so wrote what she did even though she was innocent and it was circumstantial?

 

[Tofino]

Nobody’s said she took a photo of dead babies on her phone.

It was said she took pictures of the two deceased siblings together. There was no context. This could have been a reasonable request from parents.

If there is a completely innocent explanation for the photo, because the parents asked her to take it, even on her phone to send to them, then this twisting is even worse than daily Mail fodder. I know there is no context here but why would the prosecution completely discredit themselves if the defence are just going to come back and say the parents asked her to do it.