Thank you for posting this. I have been unwell with a very bad salivary gland infection, time of the month and just feeling really low and under the weather. But then I begin to panic that im not thinking happy thoughts ir being positive. The more I moan how tired I am or how much pain im in, the universe will give more tiredness and pain to me!
I hope you feel better soon
it's horrible how clusters of sickness, seem to come at the same time, and it can be difficult to find respite, sometimes.
I am going through my own bad patch at the moment (co vid again!) and have been practically bed bound. No fun, hardly sleeping and with gastrointestinal issues and then the bloody hacking cough! Lovely
So I feel for you, right now,
it is tough.
This time though I'm just accepting it, and going with the flow, I hate being sick (who doesn't?) but I told myself (because this thread also inspires me) that this time I will cope with it as best I can.
So this time I made myself as comfortable as possible, I got a good list of films on netflix, I got my husband to shop or got in takeaway....I tell myself I'm lucky to be able to do that.
I do my theta meditation video's before sleep, and when my cough was really disturbing me it helped calm my nerves and I slept afterwards....
I just think yeah I can do this.... remember the coping mechanisms... remember the tools you have learnt?
Surrendering, letting go, not being hard on myself all help? I caught myself having a bit of a meltdown the other day (quite comical as I can't shout, just screech
)...then I thought ok...hang on I'm being ridiculous here....there is another way to deal with this.
So I went downstairs and explained to my husband what I needed and asked for help.
I think having (or reminding myself) of a mindset of manifestation (gratitude) helped me to do that.
I haven't always been the best at being assertive, and had a I'll go it alone mentality...but that's the fastest way to burn out isn't it?
The universe I think or abundance in general, reminds us that we are not alone, and asking for help and support when really needed is just part of trusting life?
That took a lot for me to learn, but I remind myself it's ok to be sick or ill or bad tempered or needy so long as I am honest with myself.
When you're honest life responds to that, I feel this.... manifestation is not for liars! Or it is but that's a false paradise.....maybe that's the toxic positivity that's called denial, and yes I have felt pushed into that at times.
Like life was maybe for some of us so hostile at some point that we had to construct a different reality, one in which our needs were met!
People are ingenious! Thats a survival strategy right there! We all need to survive, but we need to live as well.
When the ideal or idealisation (and that's what denial is a projection of the ideal imo) doesn't work is when we can feel like we are not good enough or never will.
Chronic insecurity/anxiety can really be soul destroying though and it's this mindset that I am gradually moving away from.
First because we can rescue ourselves, I don't believe in the concept of a saviour anymore (I was brought up in a religious family). That was my Achilles heal,and people pleaser tendancies getting triggered?
We are all given gifts and tools even if they are hidden or we don't always see them.
So it takes the sting out of feeling needy or helpless for every bad state we find ourselves in, there is another corresponding state of helpfulness or courage as well.
This only comes though, when we accept our limitations, then we can work through them
I really believe that a lot of us suffer when we are ill because as a society we seem to be very stuck on the idea and execution of purpose and doing things and being productive even performative?
We've all had those times when we felt forced to put on a brave face, or soldier on, or felt guilty for not being able to give?
If anything this whole pandemic has taught me, that I really don't want to do that anymore!
It's ok to be sick, I'm not a performing seal, and the world isn't going to end if, my children eat pizza or I don't do the all the housework, etc etc..
All this buzz for example with influencers and be kind, but maybe the best way to be kind is not to have unrealistic standards (that society encourages, dissatisfaction is very profitable).....
Unrealistic standards or expectations of ourselves that is? We are here to live, to experience pleasure to be loved, and to be helped, as long as we help ourselves to that as well?
My point being that it's not normal to push ourselves beyond limitations day in day out, or try to do it all.
Yet life can be relentless (or feel like it) but then by facing up to that, and saying hang on that's not what I want, we can with practice get what we really want?
More time or more space or more pleasurable experiences, yes we can all do that. It is possible, when you go through the pain, it just adds to your appreciation of these precious things.
For me that's the real meaning of manifestation cultivating a sense of gratitude....and grace in times of uncertainty and stress.
We have all done this, we just need to remind ourselves?
I was the woman on the cardio ward doing Tai chi after heart surgery....I was the one that the lovely Italian doctor commented on that, she has a positive attitude, she wants to recover I can see that...and he gave me admiration for that! How humble and generous and kind people can be.
Our attitude does make a difference, and positivity does help but as a support to our vulnerabilities not a denial of them.
Thank you
and
@fusspot and all the other lovely people on this thread.I was down as well and that article just reminded me of perspective.
Sometimes we all need that, I also needed to be reminded to trust life a bit more, (or universe) and not be so wary, pain is better dealt with understanding and kindness.
I matter I am a person I have needs, so do all of us and that's absolutely as it should be, we are all human and striving after a happiness (that if you have been programmed by narcissistic parents like me)was based on the promise of others, so never found within!
Well that turned out to be the biggest lie! That other people could provide the answers or play god, when all the time we have a higher power at our disposal, but that comes from us, I believe when we connect to source (intuition) and love ourselves, not egotistically but with the awareness of limitations that pain brings, just makes it all the sweeter, when we eventually ease beyond them, and that is more than possible.
Sorry this turned into another long post! Thanks again for reading.
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