Jessontheplussize #35 Jess Your pizzas on fire and contents still dire!

[honey&lemon]

Pre inthestyle ‘party wear’ versus the new collekshun.

Old Jess 10000% would not have worn any of the stuff she brings out now. Such a shame, not at all who she was when I started following her.

 

[LostScot82]

Anyone else cringing thru the whole wine storybook this evening? Admits knows nothing about white wine, nothing about reisling, some pal told her to swirl it around the glass and if it sticks its good (doesn't matter about the taste), its expensive because its nearly £10 a bottle, and thinks she is so grown up and fancy because her and Milli have opened a bottle to have with their "dinner, dinner, double portion dinner"
All this after the washing line and washing the sheets questions?
This is a woman, an actual woman, who has owned a house and been married for yaaars?

 

[LostScot82]

It’s either that or she’s not feeling comfortable in her clothes and not liking what she’s seeing in the mirrow, regardless of what she’s wearing.

Mirrow Mirrow on the wall
Who is the laziest of them all?

 

[Diddikins]

So she knew she’d ordered a chocolate fudge cake but still felt the need to make two massive cakes, millionaire shortbread PLUS cornflake cakes.
I get that she did the cornflake cakes for the kids but she could have gotten away with just those and the cheesecake knowing she had the chocolate cake coming too.

 

[Tiny-T]

If she sat down with her bank statement and looked at all the money she’s wasted in the last couple of months alone she’d have her new sofa.

 

[Tiny-T]

If you're that out of breathe moving some potatoes about, might be time to reassess your life choices.

Wey no, have your Sunday dinner and follow it up with some carrot cake, cheesecake, shortbread then polish off with a crispie cake.

 

[Em_]

At least if most of her family are big or like food at least she won’t get fat shamed like I did the other day by my future MIL.

she was going to put some t shirts in a roller at work (she does laundry and cleaning) because some of her husbands t shirts had shrunk in the dryer
So she decided to tell me that once she had done that ‘they will be as big as yours are’


Also my car broke down today and had to drive home about 5 miles a hour so it wouldn’t overheat

I swear if she says she’s had a gusto with extra shit it will tip me over the edge haha

Your MIL sounds like a cunt.

Millies parents had to look after Darcey well she entertained her family, thats fucking cheeky.

 

[GiftedNotFree]

She seems to be getting more and more reclusive / housebound. She only leaves the house to go to shoots, her aunties for dinner, the pub / a restaurant occasionally or to get her hair or nails done.

She has SO much free time and seemingly endless money, why doesn’t she do something!? Take a cooking / baking class, go swimming, take Darcy on walks or to a dog park. Literally anything!!!

All she seems to do is loaf around the house all day.

 

[Loubell83]

That’s where I live in a little village, it’s cheaper where my parents live. Having said that, Jess could afford to pay the £7, she could actually go to the supermarket.

I have to mention the ice, why can’t she make up some ice and put it in the freezer? I do wonder at times how she’s got this far in life.

Why the fuck is she getting a delivery in the first place? She literally has nothing to do.

I get deliveries because I work full time from home and have kids, any chance I get to go and shop in the supermarket I jump at it.

Wouldn’t pay £7 for a slot though, Tesco is extortionate for delivery (my boring take on slotgate)

 

[Diddikins]

Urgh look at them both cramming it in. It was like watching Bruce Bogtrotter.

 

[Lurkeryaar]

I love little Darcy and I’m sure Jess does too, but honestly it’s no wonder she’s “needy”, what with the house moves and being left with different people when Jess and Milli go away.
She doesn’t seem to have any walking routine either.
Dogs need a routine and a bit of security.

She's probably also terrified by what probably to her sounds like two t-rexs stomping round the house all the time. When Jess starts dancing she probably thinks it's an earthquake.

 

[Skinny]

I mean, it’s Tattle, we are all horrible rude insulting wankers aren’t we

 

[Rnttfl]

Won't spend money on a sofa when that's where she spends all her time. Make it make sense

 

[DizDog32]

Grazing tables make me feel werpy it all being sat out like that and then all those grubby unwashed fingers, rank

 

[GerardNoWay]

Imagine going to someone’s house for lunch and they serve you up triple pastry dishes all with huge slices taken out

I physically wouldn’t be able to eat it knowing they’ve had their paws all over it. Even more so if I’d seen those stories. Absolutely bogging.

 

[Crusty_punk]

She grabbed the first oversized t-shirt she could find? So why didn't she put it on instead of that tight one?

 

[Also_smoke_and_mirrors]

Every time I think of what their 'design' meeting must be like, I think of chubby mermaid's high street plus size clothing reels and I bet she's so close to the truth.

 

[HanHan.]

Why ?

It’s giving thumb head guy vibes…

---

 

[Loobloo]

Why does she dye her eyebrows jet black? They look monstrous against her complexion and hair colour. Strange choice.

Also, do we think that moving her eyebrows about to that tune, was to prove she hasn't had botox?! She's defo been reading here.

 

[instamumsaredaft]

At least she's starting to exercise its going in the right direction. Maybe when she's lost a couple of stone she'll walk outside more. I find it strange she hates doing that bit parades round in bikinis on holiday.