Why 2 cups of coffee
Jake Quickenden #96 Hello, I'd like to file for a divorce please. My husband is a gayboi cock tease! 🌈
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Either:Why 2 cups of coffee
a) to pretend she's a good beard and that he's at home with her.
b) one for her and one for her massive chin.
A day in the life of someone who needs to get off their bony ass and go to work. I dont have time for burnt pancakes plus gym and swimming cos I'm at bleeping work all day every day!! And as you can tell I've had a day of it today so don't need this pair of twats adding to it
You're not wrong - you do look rough
imagine nearing the end of your life and looking back on your achievements or what you did, and realising that so much time was spent chatting vacuous crap to complete strangers on an app. Who does she think she is with her notes, Fiona Bruce? Tell me you’re bored without telling me you’re bored. Maybe some volunteering would make her more humble and grateful just like her son
Sleep ain't gonna make you look any better 'bro'. 
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As if he’s blaming lack of sleep for looking like the back end of a badgers arse! Sleep can’t fix uglySleep ain't gonna make you look any better 'bro'.
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Yep, he looks rough as duck! Just goes to show how many filters are used every single day! Happy Friday Fakey’s 
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Has his delusion gone so far now he doesn’t think that’s what he actually looks like without his beloved filters? Most people wouldn’t share something if they thought they looked so rough but because they’ve said he is the ‘nicest and most down to earth guy’ and ‘so talented’, Mr Ego has to post it. Probably still seething from the 2 women on Flappys post slagging him off so wants to show people that there are still ‘fans’ out there that think he’s ‘nice’ His biggest ‘fan’ went last night so get ready for more stories today on what a wonderful person he is
His biggest ‘fan’ went last night so get ready for more stories today on what a wonderful person he is Attachments
It’s simply the real unfiltered monstrosity!Sleep ain't gonna make you look any better 'bro'.
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Need sleep why what the hell has he been doing? duck all! Yesterday boxing at 9.30 is the earliest we have seen him in weeks! Bet he doesn’t emerge from his hotel room much before midday lazy twit! Another 86 followers lost yesterday maybe needs to stop biting back at people especially when his engagement is tit he’s getting nastier aswell that person wasn’t even unkind just said it was funny the first time well I tell you what would be funny if he got dropped from Masterchef before it even started for being such a prick
I’d love to see him dropped because he’s not been able to stop hinting that’s what he’s doing and the contestants are meant to keep it a secret. The non stop cooking stories and following other rumoured contestants plus the little things he’s been saying, to me make it blatantly obvious that’s his next reality gig.
The irony is he claims to live a healthy lifestyle, exercise, teetotal, healthy eating and yet he still looks dreadful.
I bet she's still a virgin.Has his delusion gone so far now he doesn’t think that’s what he actually looks like without his beloved filters? Most people wouldn’t share something if they thought they looked so rough but because they’ve said he is the ‘nicest and most down to earth guy’ and ‘so talented’, Mr Ego has to post it. Probably still seething from the 2 women on Flappys post slagging him off so wants to show people that there are still ‘fans’ out there that think he’s ‘nice’
Awww look at Sam living the life Fakey has been manifesting! Please check on Jaknob! Fakey you see it makes a difference being someone people want to work with, unlike you who only pretends to be nice on Insta!
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I think he maybe but doubt it
Has realised he is just a last minute.com stand in when they need a competition doing on the cheap.Neither of them have anything about them as a couple.Leo just a well used pawn in this loveless marriage.Shes obviously in the states and him once again gone missing in action as his prize monkey not around to exploit.
Has realised he is just a last minute.com stand in when they need a competition doing on the cheap.Neither of them have anything about them as a couple.Leo just a well used pawn in this loveless marriage.Shes obviously in the states and him once again gone missing in action as his prize monkey not around to exploit.Oh dear no wonder he’s quiet this morning I think it was end of last year he was absolutely desperate to get back on Loose Men preferably as a panel member let’s face it that’s the only reason he got his saggy sack out on there
He just gets the dregs of work that nobody else will do.
You can imagine ITV sending out job details to a variety of agents of zelebrities -
"Hi, we've got a slot coming up that would require your client to swim in a freezing Welsh lake in February/ have a naked testicular examination on tv for about five minutes airtime"
Everyone else's agents "No, thank you, but thank you for thinking of my client. Hope to work with you in the future on other projects. Warmest regards"
Polly "OMG YES! Jake will happily do it!!!
xxxxxx"
You can imagine ITV sending out job details to a variety of agents of zelebrities -
"Hi, we've got a slot coming up that would require your client to swim in a freezing Welsh lake in February/ have a naked testicular examination on tv for about five minutes airtime"
Everyone else's agents "No, thank you, but thank you for thinking of my client. Hope to work with you in the future on other projects. Warmest regards"
Polly "OMG YES! Jake will happily do it!!!
xxxxxx"What a disappointment she is. Now it’s a LBD reel and still not a pair of jeans in sight
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