Jake Quickenden Gossip Forum

New thread just in time for the Yukon 1000 race! He's going to be radio silent for the next week - unless he breaks the rules and uses his phone and gets disqualified. Hoping that Flapz will entertain us is probably wildly optimistic, the boring cow. What will dissolve first, his mental health...

Congratulations to our @Mark81 for this fab new thread title 🙌 😘 Old thread here - Jake Quickenden #128 Rubbish Holidays R Us... | Tattle Life As you were, beloved Fakeys xxx

New thread Fakeys! Fantastic thread title with 30 votes by our brilliant @Philimena cunk :love: Obviously, Phili's title was just perfect but we gotta keep the mods happy. Link to old thread (3) Jake Quickenden #127 Someone needs to get a job instead of running around dressed up as a...

Thanks for your votes for my new thread title. 😘 A heinous crime happened in the last thread. The fake Goochi was stolen! 😂 He was undoubtly dumped from Spencer Matthews' podcast as he has since unfriended him! He drove up to Zelda's for money the Leeds Marathon with Spud. By the...

A huge congratulations to our @JazzFan for the new thread title. I have also included in the title the fabulous comment in the Daily Mail about his anger at his running time in the London Marathon. A pure double whammy! 😂 The desperation is strong and getting even more stronger by the...

All hail our queen @CrazyBaldhead for another bobby dazzler of a thread title 🙌 :love: Old thread here: Jake Quickenden #124 On Only Fans floggin' his weiner 🥕 Flaps can order a new fridge freezer | Tattle Life As you were, Fakeys xx

New thread Fakeys! Cracking title courtesy of our @ShowMeThe Money 🙌😘 Link to previous thread Jake Quickenden #123 Rita, Sue and Knobhead Too! | Tattle Life

Thanks all for your votes for my new thread title! 😘 Nothing really exciting happened in the last thread apart from some major fashion disasters from the syrupped one. This one he resembles Kermit the Frog! 😂 We have had multiple stories of 'Father of the Year', missing home (yeah right...

A huge congratulations to @Justdee for our new thread title! 😘 It's been an absolute borefest tbh with the 'Father of the Year' still claiming that he's a doting family man who is a real 'home bird', although at any opportunity, he buggers off faster than a missile into the sunset. He's...

A huge congratulations to our @bluecups for the new thread title - taken from a review of the 'Tapped in the Head' (Untapped) podcast with 'Spenny' Matthews. Fakey has already given it the kiss of death as it is, quite frankly, shit! 😂 What in the name of Grindr is going on here...

A huge congratulations to our @Philimena cunk for the new thread title! You win a year's supply of KitKats and a compilation video of Bernard Breslaw's most iconic moments on the Carry On films! 😂😂 Well, all I can say is that over the last thread, his stories have been manic. For somebody...

A huge congratulations to our @Lico for our new thread title! 😘 Elf has finally finished and the rest of the cast can now breathe a sigh of relief as they will probably never ever see him again! We are still recovering over those God awful Parasite Shoes that he received as a Christmas...

Thank you my fellow Fakeys for your votes for my new thread title! 🥰 Fakey is currently playing the Elf from Temu in a manky old hall and Flapz is still pregnant with SpudRat. Their content has been absolutely appalling as they literally have no lives or souls. Both look extremely desperate...

A huge congratulations to @Eastendskin for our new thread title! You win a shitty Christmas tree just like the one the Colchester Clampets have. Where do we start? Well, the same old, same old really. Flapz is still boring us with the turkey baster pregnancy, RatBoy is still clinging on to...

Thank you so much for your votes for my new thread title! 😘 Short recap: The desperation is off-the-scale for both Fakey and Flapz. He is still grappling for any 5 minutes TV exposure to get his ugly face on TV although nobody wants to see him at all. Flapz is blatantly begging for gifted...

Title by @ShowMeThe Money nominated by Bluecaps Shoutout to @Justdee for this very apt suggestion And the grief drones on,and on. As sophs pregnancy enters month 2076 RECAP - I probably should put this behind a spoiler in case people don't know- Flaps is Pregnant Fakey is still...

A huge congratulations to our @trine for our new thread title! 🥰 Not much to really recap as these two are falling down the hole of actual 'irrelevance' more and more each boring day of theirs. 😴😴😴 Flapz is boring us with her non-bump and looking like she's just been dug up, Spud is still...

A huge congratulations to @PryingPenny for the original quote and our @ChastityDingle for bringing it to the Fakeys' attention. Well done you two. You get a free syrup each from Fakey and some Estrid Razors and Red Bull cans from Flapz. 🥰 After fucking off to Ibiza without Fred on yet...

Thank you for all your votes for my new thread title which is very appropriate! 😘 We saw them manage to grift yet another holiday, this time to Cornwall. Yes, they stayed at the hotel, made the most of the freebies and didn't do any sightseeing as they are skint. Definitely the wrong person...

A huge congratlations to our @Phillimena cunk on our new thread title. 😘😘😘 Our poll results from the last thread! Well, we have finally had the gender reveal but thanks to our inside information from our lovely Fakey and also thanks to my trusty crystal pendulum, we were correct. Flapz's...

Thanks for all your votes for my new thread title. 💖 Brief recap. Yes, the Beard is pregnant, Gail has proven to us even more that he is a horrid little brat and the Beard is currently in Ibeefa with her mate. No doubt Zelda is down to assist as he is incapable of doing it on his own. So...

Congratulations to @CrazyBaldhead for the new thread title She's up the duff with this absolute waster but it's all the work of a turkey baster! 🌈 Had to be edited slightly to fit Carrying on from...

A huge congratulations to our lovely @Vanilla Ice for our new thread title. 😘 Short recap because it's been so embarrassing. He did an abseil for Sarcoma UK and made it all about himself. In fact, the other abseilers were completely forgotten about. He literally jumped on this event for...

A huge congratlations to me, yes me, for this brilliant thread title for I am currently enjoying some Jamaican rum. 🤪 As I have been away for three weeks twerking and acting like 'Shabba' and twerking in the sunshine, nothing much has changed with this wrinkly, old chicken nugget head and his...

Brilliant title by @Cleopops with inspiration from @Hayze2384 and @trine. New thread just in time for Fakey’s star turn ‘supporting’ Soccer Aid, not actually playing again this year. He had a not quite headline slot at a free local festival, only thing is it was a 5 hour drive for him so he...