Don’t rub your fanny on me!
Jack Monroe #79 Big mistake. Big. HUGE.
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I find it particularly jarring when you watch an interview with her, because she has such a flat monotone, and is quite inarticulate when unscripted. It's really hard to reconcile Twitter Jack with Real Life Jack.
Alan: Right, let battle commence! [Slightly muffled] Do you like me doing that? Shall I do it more quickly or shall I maintain the same speed?
Pocahontas: That’s fine.
Alan: Right. Shall I move on to the other one? Oh, that’s lovely. That’s first class. That is superb. Ooh, there you go, it’s all happening! Poca, I’m afraid I have no sheathes.
Jill: No what?
Pocahontas: Sheathes, er, prophylactics, you know, rubber johnnies. Actually, being your age and everything there’s probably no need for them. I’m talking about the menopau – whoooo! Poca, you know your onions! Do you mind if I talk? It helps me keep the… wolf from the door, so to speak. Poca, what do you think about the pedestrianisation of Norwich town centre? I’ll be honest I’m dead against it. People forget that [increasingly breathless] traders need access to Dixons! [Regaining himself] They do say it’ll help people in [half-sighing] wheeeeelchairs…
This is perfect
I waited 22 years to get another cat. I say "get" - both cats arrived and moved themselves in 27 years apart. The first was from a gorgeous litter of kittens that were born to a stray in the neighbourhood, that my I pestered my mother to let in when I was 12. The second is purring on my lap now - she appeared in the garden of a house I was renting 5 years ago, and she was determined to move in, leaving dead rodents outside the back door as rent while I looked for her owners. (I quickly learned not to go outside barefoot.) No one claimed her, which made me sad because she is a lovely friend, so I took her in, even though it was against the lease, because I knew I would have my own house soon. In the years between 18 and 40, I didn't have a home for a pet, much as I would have liked one. Maybe Louisa is the same. I know she has a lot more money than I do, but even if you can afford good kennels and dog-walkers if you are away a lot, a pet is part of the household and it isn't fair to be leaving them and changing their environment too much. Jack has absolutely no shame if she is thinking of getting a dog to live in her chaos.
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#80 DON’T RUB YOUR FANNY ON ME
Thank you, this is actually very helpful to see
It's something I wonder about more and more as though I never struggled in a classroom/social situation, outside of that when it comes to organisation, timekeeping, sticking to a plan and getting anything done unless I'm working to someone else's schedule - smouldering disaster well into adulthood. I can't tell how much is simple rubbishness inherent to me and how much could possibly be something else. I really take my hat off to you for your discipline, and I agree that it's really hard to see someone not helping themselves when they have the resources - almost as hard as watching myself when I get into the pit
Speaking tangentially of which, this sounds excellent!!
It was found to be unlawfully discrimination and so it shouldn’t be happening but there is no independent force to monitor it. It will depend on individuals taking cases if prevented from renting a house. Sadly I think a lot of landlords and agents will risk it and keep saying no DSS (which on a separate note always annoys me as it hasn’t been the DSS for years).
Read that to the tune of 'Don't You Forget About Me'
I'm honestly so ancient that I *still* refer to it as the DHSS, old habits die hard.
Me too. Wham rap.
Everyone still knows what it is. It’s like the Inland Revenue. How many people call it HMRC?
Similar boat here, grew up with dogs and would do anything to have another. I regularly browse the dogs Trust website looking at them all. But I don't have the money, don't have the space, don't have the security of owning my own home (if I had to rent another place, would I be able to find a dog friendly house?) and work full time. It wouldn't be fair on the poor pup. You can want an awful lot in life and still recognise that a) you're not in the right place for it and b) it's not just you who'll be affected if you get a pet and then a month later can't cope/can't give it the life it deservesI would *love* to have a dog but aside from the financial implications, I have numerous health conditions which mean I simply couldn't guarantee I would be able to look after a dog/walk it regularly. Mr IW is not interested in getting one so I would need to be certain I could manage it regardless of if Mr IW started to love the dog too..
(I appreciate a well person could get a dog and then suddenly find themselves unable to care for it. But I know from the outset that I wouldn't be able to manage..)
Ugh. She rinses my beans
What the duck does that even mean? She's so frustrating.
Wow, is that a first? Jack actually being self aware? 
She's the bloody queen of word salads.
She's now asking Spanish folk whether using orzo in a rice dish would be seen as sacrilegious. Wtf when has she ever given a tit about the authenticity of a dish? Literally EVERYTHING is interchangeable 
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