I bet the words “darling” and “sweetheart” are very useful to men like BJ!
Jack Monroe #78 All of your food is brown
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Late on the Burberry scarf but I don’t know why she bothers buying the odd “luxury” (hate that word) item when she pairs it with such utter shite? I know the coven hate the scarf but it can look cool af if you can actually dress, which we’ve established she can’t. It’s sad she’s spending £200 a pop on shoes, £350 on cashmere scarves and still look like a Karen old enough to be her mother? Honestly £40 in uni qlo and you can look cool af - this is so unnecessary.
And sad that she can’t fit tuition in her budget after these unveils isn’t it.
And sad that she can’t fit tuition in her budget after these unveils isn’t it.
The last one is hilarious. Sausage, baked beans and lettuce (not shown on shopping list but definitely visible in the pic) in a pitta bread.Who the duck needs a recipe for sausage, chips & beans? Or Sausage, mash, peas & gravy?
Totally. It's just like with her interior design. No style, just throwing money at something expensive which she hopes will impress. I have a total weakness for expensive clothes but before I make a big purchase (which is relative cos I'm quite poor - I'm talking like sth from Sandro not Burberry!) I imagine how I'll wear it, what it'll go with, what situations I can apply the piece to... Part of the fun is making a statement piece work in your wardrobe of, as you say, uniqlo
Jack MonroeWho the duck needs a recipe for sausage, chips & beans? Or Sausage, mash, peas & gravy?
I'd call him Dad..
“Smokey” sausage. Not sure where the smokiness comes from when pairing Lincolnshire sausages with baked beans and no additional seasoning.
Your write-ups are brilliant @Pocahontas but also educational. I can now add “joie de vivre” to my growing list of new words & phrases learned from your thread recaps. I’ve still yet to use “betwixt” IRL.
It's the brown sauce, innit?
Can you imagine Jack's recipe for sausage, mash, peas and gravy?
INGREDIENTS
6 x sausages (3p each)
Asda essential cola (17p) - to marinade the sausages
1 tin of sweetcorn INC. ephemera
Instant potato mash
POBP
1 tin spaghetti hoops (rinsed) mixed with 1 tin of marrowfat peas
red lentils
Gravy granules
1 kilo lard
Handful of kale
1 tin Tesco finest sardines
1 5 day old bag of lettuce
1 cup cold tea
3 tablespoons tomato puree mixed with 500ml stock & some tiny bits of carrot
EQUIPMENT
Bullet blender
Slow cooker
Mandolin
Sieve
Chainsaw
Le Creuset casserole dish
Sunglasses
Potato ricer
Air Fryer (aff link)
Ah yes sorry, you’re right! Didn’t see that bit
@HarderFaster, sterling work there (too slow to reply before thread closed) only need to add lip filler 
BBQ might be better, but maybe too FANCY?
Chainsaw! HAHAHA! HAHAHA! That's done me!
Ohhhhhh I can’t keep up with these threads at the mo! But I had to comment on that insta post from the last thread because it made me absolutely seethe. You know she absolutely loved that two people were concerned for her and took time out of their day to pay some attention to fragile little troubled Jack (if it happened which it probably didn’t). It’s so pathetic. Jack Monroe, the protagonist of reality.
‘Notoriously deep lake’. How deep does a lake have to be to obtain notoriety? Does it penetrate into the earth’s core? Is it a gateway into hell? To be fair I’d consider any place with Jack sat waiting at the end of it the gateway to hell.
‘Notoriously deep lake’. How deep does a lake have to be to obtain notoriety? Does it penetrate into the earth’s core? Is it a gateway into hell? To be fair I’d consider any place with Jack sat waiting at the end of it the gateway to hell.
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She claimed she joined but was banned, she was going to provide details to yel, but no idea if she ever did
I’ve always thought that shop gave off major gammon vibes, but I guess I got it confused with sausages.
I think the inference was that she might put stones in her pockets and put herself in.
On the one hand it’s a load of nonsense attention seeking that would be dismissed as such.
On the other, it feeds in to just the kind of thing that triggers vulnerable, kind people who she dangles on her line.
Despicable.
Chipotle Tabasco sauce gives a nice smoky hint too, but with a bit of a kick.
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