Jack Monroe #77 Further into the depths of culinary depravity

[Tabitha D]

If anyone wants the full collection of Jack comments: https://profile.theguardian.com/user/id/10074495?page=1

Our one-stop slop shop was as charming as ever in her Graun days, without a thankyou in sight.

Wow, she is so obnoxious.
Also, she “only eats higher welfare meat”??? What absolute steaming bollocks.

 

[MooBelle]

Just putting this here for the reference to Jack's grandfather's restaurant, chip shop and his guest houses (plural).

Did we have 'broken toe' on the list of ailments?

 

[Veronicaaa]

Creamed tuna on toast. It involves making a white sauce (without oil) though.

While looking at her comments on the Guardian, I came across this - I can't believe what a faff she makes of it, I've never had to sieve lumps out a white sauce, maybe I'm just some sort of culinary genius (though I expect not). https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2015/feb/18/jack-monroes-anchovy-aigrettes-recipe

 

[Emmapism]

thank christ she's finally posted the recipe on twitter!

she's committed to stealing @Alansbigplate 's bit though View attachment 253149

much like the fake account finding lard as funny as I do after I mentioned it here...

whoever's behind it, it's really not funny

'Oh this old joke? I've used it LOADS. Before you even thought of it, probably. I'm hilarious'

 

[NP]

While looking at her comments on the Guardian, I came across this - I can't believe what a faff she makes of it, I've never had to sieve lumps out a white sauce, maybe I'm just some sort of culinary genius (though I expect not). https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2015/feb/18/jack-monroes-anchovy-aigrettes-recipe

So she did know how to make a white sauce THEN, but for some reason chooses to blend oil, flour and cold milk NOW?

 

[Lumpyspaceprincess]

She might only eat high welfare meat. She feeds her child the tit.

 

[Veronicaaa]

So she did know how to make a white sauce THEN, but for some reason chooses to blend oil, flour and cold milk NOW?

I'm guessing that she messed it up so many times that she eventually gave up? Also I think this was her Allegra period, I'm picturing Allegra standing over her each time she attempts it, on hand to sieve out the lumps, return it to the pan, and whisper encouraging words in her ear.

 

[SoulRebel]

Did we have 'broken toe' on the list of ailments?

No! Now added and will update stat.
Thankyou xoxo

 

[JoyceDivision]

So she did know how to make a white sauce THEN, but for some reason chooses to blend oil, flour and cold milk NOW?

Yes absolutely x

 

[lilamay]

Did we have 'broken toe' on the list of ailments?

And what about broken foot? Or was the broken toe exaggerated into a broken foot?

 

[Captainmouse]

While looking at her comments on the Guardian, I came across this - I can't believe what a faff she makes of it, I've never had to sieve lumps out a white sauce, maybe I'm just some sort of culinary genius (though I expect not). https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2015/feb/18/jack-monroes-anchovy-aigrettes-recipe

If it’s got lumps, you’ve done it wrong and the flour won’t be cooked

 

[LavaFlake]

I'm actually mortified on her behalf that she lurked in the Guardian comments like that. I mean I guess I'm not surprised after her patrolling of the DKL hashtag, but it's so immature.

Also screaming at her property magnet Grandad. Multiple guesthouses, a chippy AND a restaurant is quite a portfolio? The best thing is that it's all from her own admission!

 

[Jay-cloth Cow]

anyway, I noticed this yummy scrummy gratin was tagged in "entertaining" (ye gods it is) and I thought what else does she think is suitable for entertaining? so I had a scroll.

in amongst the bleak brown offerings, I thought oh this looks ok, you know, there's large bits at least

View attachment 252795

then upon studying said recipe, it concludes thus

View attachment 252796

"make a slurry"
followed by a plea to get her on the telly.

some things never change

I made this back in't day! It was actually quite nice. Once I added about another 15 spoonfuls of mustard as prior to that, bland bland bland.

 

[Eurgh]

Is it just me who hates when people say Graun?

 

[Montrachet]

And what about broken foot? Or was the broken toe exaggerated into a broken foot?

View attachment 253197

Love little Annie Urchin feigning ignorance about the fancy clancy hoity-toity breads that the Mrs has in her lavish London home. #stubbornaboutfacts

 

[Debarkle]

To be fair to Jack, writers for the Guardian are encouraged to comment and interact with readers BTL (below the line) ... just not like that

 

[ComeForTheX StayForTheY]

Is it just me who hates when people say Graun?

Babe, same x

 

[I’MBUSY!]

No no no no NO.

That proper gives me the heebie-jeebies.

 

[Begborrowsteal]

No no no no NO

STOP IT

 

[LavaFlake]

No no no no NO

Is JM becoming a... furry?! Tbf might be a societal subset with a lot of Patreon potential.

Another attention-seeking photo, another day of not quite believeing this person is 32 (Jack: this is a reference to you posting like a 15 year old weeb, not your incorrect Company's House data).

Eta: this properly chills my blood too. It seems so sinister?! Like a purge mask idk?!