Jack Monroe #71 Jack flew over the cuckoo’s nest

[MarmiteExtract]

Yes you have to join us, @MancBee! Shall we pop a lovely little Viv Westwood number on you and sneak you in?

Prison Break was set in a men's prison. Well, the first season was, anyway — I think they escaped after that (spoiler!).

 

[SoulRebel]

I have no desire to change gender, but I am beginning to consider it to join you lot "within these walls" (one for the oldies). Has there ever been a TV drama about life inside a Men's prison? I can only think of the comedy Porridge, you have had quite a few that I can think of.

Oh my life, I am distantly (through marriage) related to Sonia Graham, how old are we? You can be my witch pad mate when we're all locked up, Mancy.

 

[HarderFaster]

Maybe I should be worried that I'm going to be arrested for Crimes Against Jack Monroe but I'm actually sitting her cackling at the idea of Jack compiling her "police report" in - I dunno - bleeping Comic Sans or something and putting it in a slip wallet folder to hand in at the station, where she'll be assured that they'll take the nasty coven lies Very Seriously Indeed, and her scurrying home to tweet that we're going to be in sshhhhoooooo much trrrrouble for saying Mean Things.

Much as I loathe her, I genuinely wouldn't wish any harm to come to her, but if her literally seeking out a forum where a group of people call out her many, monetised fibs is the worst thing that has ever happened to her then she needs to speak to some actual victims and gain a sense of perspective.

 

[Malacandra]

Daddy! He’s 10

Many Northern Irish people call their aged parents Mummy or Mammy and Daddy.

 

[NellieBoo]

she will probably bring a walking frame to the court.

Or a wheelchair like Katie Price.

 

[MarmiteExtract]

Maybe I should be worried that I'm going to be arrested for Crimes Against Jack Monroe but I'm actually sitting her cackling at the idea of Jack compiling her "police report" in - I dunno - bleeping Comic Sans or something and putting it in a slip wallet folder to hand in at the station, where she'll be assured that they'll take the nasty coven lies Very Seriously Indeed, and her scurrying home to tweet that we're going to be in sshhhhoooooo much trrrrouble for saying Mean Things.

She's always banging on about her lever arch folders — she'd definitely hand her report in in one of those.

 

[BeautifulTrauma]

Maybe I should be worried that I'm going to be arrested for Crimes Against Jack Monroe but I'm actually sitting her cackling at the idea of Jack compiling her "police report" in - I dunno - bleeping Comic Sans or something and putting it in a slip wallet folder to hand in at the station, where she'll be assured that they'll take the nasty coven lies Very Seriously Indeed, and her scurrying home to tweet that we're going to be in sshhhhoooooo much trrrrouble for saying Mean Things.

Much as I loathe her, I genuinely wouldn't wish any harm to come to her, but if her literally seeking out a forum where a group of people call out her many, monetised fibs is the worst thing that has ever happened to her then she needs to speak to some actual victims and gain a sense of perspective.

Comic Sans font has me HOOTING!!

However, don’t ever get JM started on a game of who’s had it worse, surely Tattle can’t be as bad as all of her illnesses, assaults, shin kicking, black eyes, walking sticks, bleeding feet. Surely not?!

 

[Candytuft]

@MancBee there was a character on Prisoner (Cell blockH) called Alan who got into Wentworth in bad drag to be with his girlfriend Lainey Dobson. It was a terrible storyline, though and you are more worthy.
Best we keep you out of it.
You can send fruit, cunningly laced with vodka like the Costa Cons did, if you would be so kind.
Love a prison drama, me.

 

[MarmiteExtract]

Imagine our dismay when Jack turns out to be the prison chef.

"Excuse me, prison guard? Any chance I could just take some stale bread and water in my cell please? Thanks"

 

[Babysnark]

I was wondering why noone's posted any of her new instagrams but then i remembered she's gone private..

Spoiler: Kitten

Hope this is okay to say it's just she's reposted a selfie with the poor little kitten in the cartoon filter and it makes me so mad and sad and just ugh I didn't need that

 

[Bwidge]

Remember the Mills/McCartney divorce hearing where Heather chucked a jug of water over Macca's lawyer? I'm imagining Jackie lurking outside the courtroom ready to douse us all with bottled lemon juice and bowls of assorted slop while screaming at us to duck OFF.

That is quite a scary thought

 

[busylass]

I'm picturing it like the prison scene out of Bridget Jones 2. Endless fags, some rather fetching Wonderbras and an organised sing-song, starting with a rousing rendition of Bare Depressipes.

In my early teens I was really into American culture. Always wanted to go to summer camp. I'm feeling this will be my chance with my fellow fraus.

 

[NellieBoo]

@MancBee there was a character on Prisoner (Cell blockH) called Alan who got into Wentworth in bad drag to be with his girlfriend Lainey Dobson. It was a terrible storyline, though and you are more worthy.
Best we keep you out of it.
You can send fruit, cunningly laced with vodka like the Costa Cons did, if you would be so kind.
Love a prison drama, me.

Ah Prisoner Cell Block H was amazing! Very daring at the time too, I think.

 

[BeautifulTrauma]

Was this ever discussed on Tattle following the kitten?

As usual, JM would tweet when she goes to the toilet so the fact she doesn’t call out these death threats and sets a pile on is rather strange. Probably because they didn’t happen. The article even says the vet told her to have the kitten put to sleep, and still she has a sympathy article in the paper. It’s disgusting, it’s all about Jack, the poor kitten was just a prop.

Jack Monroe hit with death threats after cat Pretzel dies

Jack Monroe resolved to do some 'serious living' instead.

metro.co.uk

 

[GrunkaLunka]

I have no desire to change gender, but I am beginning to consider it to join you lot "within these walls" (one for the oldies). Has there ever been a TV drama about life inside a Men's prison? I can only think of the comedy Porridge, you have had quite a few that I can think of.

Prisoners' Wives (BBC) was quite an accurate representation of men in prison.

 

[TheDragonWithAFlagon]

I have no desire to change gender, but I am beginning to consider it to join you lot "within these walls" (one for the oldies). Has there ever been a TV drama about life inside a Men's prison? I can only think of the comedy Porridge, you have had quite a few that I can think of.

Prison Break and Oz. It's not exactly Ronnie Barker.

 

[ChickenPorridge]

All this cartoon filter nonsense will be mass deleted at some point in the near future and never spoken of again just like all the other phases of Jackie. The cycle is getting shorter

 

[Switchstreetz]

In my opinion, her 'rabbit' is actually a guinea pig with a set of Playboy ears.
#IsaidwhatIsaid

Just remember we need to back this all up in court so....will the rabbit be called to stand as a witness? The guinea pig rabbit i mean, not the ones in her famous drawer

Hoof
verb (informal)
to kick a ball

that could literally be anything!!!

take the filter off Jackie, surely even you know a basic part of food photography is being able to IDENTIFY THE FOOD

 

[Upthisweek]

New Profile photo on Twitter. The wig has finally gone!

 

[Blurp]

SB's 'daddy' works in bakery she says. I'm sure he's got unfettered access to bread pudding and doesn't want her revolting adaptation of it.

Didn't she say at the beginning of lockdown that he was a retail store manager? Of course, it could be a baker's shop.